Best Snarky Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings

“I detest goodbyes. That is, with people I like.”

Humor Friendship Friends Goodbye Farewell Parting Saying Goodbye Snark Snarky Valediction

Source: Cali the Destroyer

“Hey, boss,” Alanna approached from the hallway. “We fucked up.” The woman was all sharp angles, her plucked eyebrows precise enough to slice, cheekbones like a declaration, and obsidian eyes that bored into him.”

Character Introductions Snarky Descriptions

Book:Midnight Heist

Source: Midnight Heist

“I can hiss and spit with the best of them, but is it really necessary for me to demonstrate it? - The Malwatch”

Life Philosophy Wisdom Truth Dark Ironic Weird The Malwatch Quip Snarky

Author:Scaylen Renvac

“Ryker, you ride with Orlando,” Ryker mocked in a snarky voice as he turned to the other man. He gestured toward the Pinto with a look of revulsion on his rugged face. “How the hell does he expect both of us to fit into that tiny metal trap? Even if we could squeeze in, the tires will probably pop. In fact, let's just carry it over. It'll be faster that way.”

Funny Laughter Humorous Satire Hilarious Werewolves Cars Snarky

Book:My Wolf Cowboy

Source: My Wolf Cowboy

“The stench of sweat, sex, and Chanel Number Five were never going to come out of Liz O’Brien’s jeans.”

Sex Fae Sexy Humor Opening Lines Rockstar Snarky

Book:Captivating Melody

Source: Captivating Melody

“Danny smiled sweetly. “I’m an Aquarius who enjoys long walks on the beach and playing in the blood of my enemies.”

Banter Sass Snark Aquarius Snarky Blood Of My Enemies Walks On The Beach

Book:Taking Root

Source: Taking Root

“Gripping his hand, she shook. “The name’s Neve, not damsel in distress.”

Damsel In Distress Snarky Tough Lady Spunky Tough Chicks

Book:Poisoned Apple

Source: Poisoned Apple

“I’d normally spare you the details, but that would kind of defeat the purpose of writing a story.”

Humor Funny Humorous Witty Clever Satire Insightful Narrator Snarky Fourth Wall

Book:The Stork Ate My Brother...And Other Totally Believable Stories

Source: The Stork Ate My Brother...And Other Totally Believable Stories

“If she did bitch-slap me, I'd bitch-slap her right back, but I resented the word bitch and all its familiar forms, as it was degrading to women and dogs everywhere.”

Humor Comedy Feminist Zombies Zombie Apocalypse Snarky Humor Snarky

Book:Vegan Teenage Zombie Huntress

Source: Vegan Teenage Zombie Huntress

“Now when you say staring, are you including yourself in this assessment? I recall you taking in the view on several occasions." "For the last time, I was not staring at you." I was a terrible liar. "Now, if you're done, I'd like to finish asking my question.”

Romance Young Adult Paranormal Rowan Teen Fantasy Snarky Mortal Enchantment Kalin

Author:Stacey O'Neale

“I gotta say, I was really feeling the robe, but there's something about a girl in cartoon pajamas that does it for me.”

Romance Young Adult Paranormal Rowan Teen Fantasy Snarky Mortal Enchantment

Book:Storm Born

Source: Storm Born

“He smirked and sat up "Simmer down, Jelly Bean.”

Romance Young Adult Paranormal Rowan Teen Fantasy Snarky Mortal Enchantment

Book:Storm Born

Source: Storm Born

“Why did Nicky call me the Baby Killer?" Kiara sniffled. "Because she is a bitch," Leontes said. Jaeger gave him a chastising look. "She's dead." "Dying did not make her any less of a bitch," Leontes replied.”

Funny Honest Dead Badass Blunt Bitch Snarky Kiara Jaeger Leontes

Book:Midnight Poison

Source: Midnight Poison

“Talk later." Prophet kissed the side of his neck. "Fuck, then sleep, then fuck again, then pack." "Good itinerary.”

Prophet Snarky Tommy Se Jakes

Book:Daylight Again

Source: Daylight Again

“On her bad days, she felt like a dead albatross would be more appropriate headgear for her, suiting her mood and her apparent role in life.”

Self Deprecating Humor Snarky

Book:The Gate of Gods

Source: The Gate of Gods

“Don't say a f*cking word,' she warned Mister Kindly. (...) '. . . considering your childhood, it's little wonder you lack people skills . . .' 'Not. A. F*cking. Word.' '. . . meow . . .' ' . . . STRICTLY SPEAKING, THAT IS STILL A WORD . . . ,' Eclipse growled.”

Hilarious Lol Snarky Godsgrave

Book:Godsgrave

Source: Godsgrave

“Some days, the sheer amount of enemies we attracted made me question if maybe our crew was a little too trigger happy. That maybe we’d pissed in too many pots without thinking of the consequences. But then I remembered most folks couldn’t hold to a basic code of honor if it killed them. And kill them we did. Repeatedly.”

Enemies Pirates Steampunk Fights Opening Lines Smugglers Snarky Code Of Honor Airship

Book:The Airship Also Rises

Source: The Airship Also Rises

“True cynics kill themselves. The rest are posers, trying to use clever sarcasm and snarky remarks to hide insecurity and the fear that if they put themselves out there, they will fail.”

Life Life Lessons Fear Insecurity Sarcasm Cynical Insecure Insincerity Insincere Snark Snarky Posers Fakers Cynics

Book:Never Broken: Songs Are Only Half the Story

Source: Never Broken: Songs Are Only Half the Story

“At the risk of hurting your feelings, I think you should know that some kisses are more special than others.”

Feelings Hurt Special Kiss Kisses Snarky

Book:Reluctant Relative

Source: Reluctant Relative