“Writing checks to the IRS that include strings of zeros does not bother me ... Overall, we feel extraordinarily lucky to have been dealt a hand in life that enables us to write large checks to the government rather than one requiring the government to regularly write checks to us-say, because we are disabled or unemployed.” FeelsWritingDoeHas BeensHandsGovernmentBusinessLuckyTaxesChecksFinanceBotherStringsDisabledUnemployedIrs Author:Warren Buffett
“Let's talk about how to fill out your 1984 tax return. Here's an often overlooked accounting technique that can save you thousands of dollars: For several days before you put it in the mail, carry your tax return around under your armpit. No IRS agent is going to want to spend hours poring over a sweat-stained document. So even if you owe money, you can put in for an enormous refund and the agent will probably give it to you, just to avoid an audit. What does he care? It's not his money.” IfsWantGivingDoeCareHoursReturnTaxesHumorousDollarsTechniqueEnormousAgentsSweatMailDocumentsAccountingOverlookedIrsTax ReturnsArmpitsRefundsDoes He Care Author:Dave Barry
“However accurate or inaccurate the agency's numbers may be, tax law explicitly presumes that the IRS is always right -- and implicitly presumes that the taxpayer is always wrong -- in any dispute with the government. In many cases, the IRS introduces no evidence whatsoever of its charges; it merely asserts that a taxpayer had a certain amount of unreported income and therefore owes a proportionate amount in taxes, plus interest and penalties.” MayGovernmentLawCertainInterestJusticeNumbersCasesAmountTaxesEvidenceIncomeAgencyPlusAccurateIntroducingPenaltiesDisputesTaxpayersIrsAlways Wrong Author:James Bovard
“All we have to do now is to inform the public that the payment of social security taxes is voluntary and watch the mass exodus.” SocialMoneyWatchesSecurityTaxesMassEconomicsSocial SecurityTaxationPaymentIrsExodus Author:Walter E. Williams
“Warren Buffett's company reportedly owes the IRS a billion dollars in back taxes. When he said he wasn't paying enough taxes, he wasn't kidding.” SaidEnoughCompanyTaxesDollarsBillionsIrsBuffettWarren Buffet Author:Jay Leno
“Rather than passing a thousand pages of tax reform legislation and restarting the tax code manipulation process, we should change the paradigm. It is time to eliminate the IRS and repeal the 16th Amendment.” ShouldProcessThousandTaxesPagesPassingPassingsReformCodeManipulationAmendmentsLegislationParadigmIrsTax Reform Author:Jim Bridenstine
“The government doesn't want us to have weapons and yet, they have weapons. I think the biggest weapon they have is the IRS - Internal Revenue Service. They can use taxes as a weapon, and the IRS code that you can't even figure it out.” ThinkingWantUseGovernmentFiguresTaxesWeaponsCodeInternalsRevenueWant UIrs Author:Glenn Beck
“Churches are tax exempt because they are supposed to provide a public good. To prove that good to the IRS, churches arent supposed to hoard their money. They are supposed to spend it on goods and services for the faithful. Under this pretense, the church has made massive investments in tax free real estate all over the world. And when it comes to labor costs, they are almost free.” WorldMadeRealChurchCostProveTaxesLaborInvestmentFaithfulMassiveGoodsEstatesPretenseIrsPublic GoodGoods And Services Author:Lawrence Wright
“Yesterday the IRS announced that obese Americans are entitled to certain tax breaks. Apparently, under the new rules, you're allowed to claim two or more chins as dependents.” TwoCertainBreakTaxesClaimsYesterdayEntitledChinsIrsObeseTax Breaks Author:Conan O'Brien
“Every year I write a tax advice column and I used to always make fun of that. One year, one of my favorite IRS commissioners, I think his name was Roscoe somebody, wrote that one of the most often-asked questions by taxpayers was, "How can I contribute more?" Well, I tell ya, ol' Roscoe's really been doing situps under parked cars again. I've heard a lot of people ask a lot of questions about taxes, but I never heard anybody say, "How can I, the ordinary person, send more money for no reason?"” PeopleThinkingWritingYearsWellsPersonsReasonUsedAsksNamesFunHeardAdviceCarTaxesOrdinaryMy FavoriteNo ReasonMore MoneyTaxpayersColumnsIrsOrdinary PersonYear OneCommissioners Author:Dave Barry
“When I write my annual tax column, some ex-IRS agent will complain, "There you go IRS bashing again." They're always saying that they're just doing their job. Someone I know once said, "You could get another job."” KnowsWritingSaidJobsTaxesComplainingAgentsExesColumnsAnnualsIrs Author:Dave Barry
“The real problem with the IRS is that they let General Electric not pay any taxes -- and 50 other corporations -- that's the real scandal.” RealProblemPayTaxesCorporationsElectricScandalReal ProblemsIrsGeneral Electric Author:Michael Moore
“I'm not the only taxpayer who has no idea what he's sending to the IRS. This year, only 28 percent of all Americans will prepare their own tax returns, according to a voice in my head that invents accurate-sounding statistics.” YearsIdeasVoiceReturnTaxesPercentNo IdeaStatisticsAccurateTaxpayersIrsTax ReturnsVoices In My Head Author:Dave Barry
“The only people helped by the death tax are lawyers, accountants, and IRS agents.” PeopleTaxesLawyerAgentsAccountantsIrs Author:Bob Schaffer
“Get rid of IRS; get rid of income tax; get rid of spending.” TaxesSpendingIncomeIncome TaxIrs Author:Ron Paul
“When preparing your return, you should be sure to avoid common mistakes. The two most common taxpayer mistakes, states the IRS booklet, are (1) "failure to include a current address," and (2) "failure to be a large industry that gives humongous contributions to key tax-law-writing congresspersons."” GivingShouldWritingTwoStatesLawCommonMistakeKeysIndustryReturnTaxesCurrentsContributionAddressesPreparingTaxpayersIrs Book:The World According to Dave Barry Source: The World According to Dave Barry
“The IRS sent back my tax return saying I owed $800. I said If you'll notice, I sent a paper clip with my return. Given what you've been paying for things lately, that should more than make up the difference.” IfsShouldSaidGivenDifferencesReturnTaxesPaperIrsClipTax ReturnsPaper Clips Author:Emo Philips
“Finally, the House is working to require a comprehensive federal review of IRS regulations with a follow-up report to Congress on possible actions to reduce the tax paperwork burden imposed on small businesses.” ActionHouseTaxesCongressBurdenReportsReviewsRegulationSmall BusinessComprehensiveIrsPaperworkFollow Up Author:Michael K. Simpson
“The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hotlines staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly.” KnowsShouldIdeasKnow HowInformationTaxesEmployeePrintGod KnowsTollsIrsDynamite Author:Dave Barry
“Is there another way? Of course there is. There is a way based on simple moral principles: Everyone keeps his own money. Everyone decides what to do with his own money. No income tax. No IRS. No government grants or assistance to anyone. All charity is voluntary. It's called freedom. It's a peaceful, harmonious way of life, one that Americans once believed in.” WayGovernmentCoursesSimpleMoralPrinciplesTaxesCharityIncomePeacefulGrantsAssistanceAnother WayHarmoniousIncome TaxIrsMoral Principles Author:Jacob G. Hornberger
“Punishing enemies and rewarding friends - politics Chicago style - seems to be the unifying principle that helps explain the Obamacare waivers, the NLRB action against Boeing and IRS's gift tax assault on 501(c)(4) donors. They look like examples of crony capitalism, bailout favoritism and gangster government. One thing they don't look like is the rule of law.” LooksHelpingSeemsGovernmentActionLawEnemyPrinciplesOne ThingStyleExampleTaxesCapitalismChicagoAssaultRule Of LawObamacareGangstersIrsDonorsUnifyingBoeingBailoutsFavoritismCroniesCrony CapitalismWaiver Author:Michael Barone
“No matter what federal program one selects - Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, the drug war, the income tax and the IRS, education, foreign interventions and wars - they are all a giant mess.” WarMatterSocialSecurityDrugTaxesProgramNo Matter WhatIncomeMessGiantsSocial SecurityInterventionIncome TaxMedicareWar On DrugsIrsMedicaid Author:Jacob G. Hornberger
“I talked to one accountant, a very nice fellow who I would have been glad to have his family marry into mine. He said, "What these other accounting firms have done is very unethical. The [tax avoidance scheme] works best if it's not found out [by the IRS], so we only give it to our best clients, not the rest, so it's unlikely to be discovered. So my firm is better than the others." [Laughter] I'm not kidding. And he was a perfectly nice man. People just follow the crowd...Their mind just drifts off in a ghastly way.” PeopleIfsMenWayGivingMindHas BeensSaidDoneFoundNiceMinesTaxesLaughterFellowsCrowdsGladFirmSchemesClientsUnlikelyAvoidanceVery NiceAccountingAccountantsIrsGhastlyUnethicalNice Man Author:Charlie Munger
“In 2013 Citigroup had profits of $6.4 billion in the United States. They paid no federal income tax and, in fact, received a rebate from the IRS of $260 million. That same year J.P. Morgan had $17.2 billion in profits in the U.S. They also paid no federal income tax. Do you think it's time for tax reform?” ThinkingYearsStatesFactsUnitedMillionsUnited StatesTaxesPaidProfitBillionsIncomeReformIncome TaxIrsTax Reform Author:Bernie Sanders
“Your taxes are due a week from today. You can make out your check directly to Halliburton. Or you can do what I'm going to do. I'm filing my first joint return. No, I'm not getting married, I'm sending the IRS an actual joint with a note that says, 'If you think I'm paying for this war, you must be high.'” IfsThinkingFirstsWarTodayCan DoWeekReturnTaxesMarriedNotesDuesChecksJointsGetting MarriedIrsMake OutFiling Author:Bill Maher
“In enforcement, you always have to have both a focus on the really worst actors - you know, gang bangers, in this case, drug dealers, that sort of thing - but also routine enforcement because think about, for instance, the IRS. They don't say, OK, well, if you're not a money launderer, it doesn't matter whether you fill your tax return out right or not. They have both. They go after the really bad actors and they have a kind of general, routine enforcement.” IfsThinkingKnowsWellsKindMatterActorsCasesFocusWorstReturnDrugTaxesInstanceRoutineEnforcementGangDealerIrsDrug DealersTax Returns Author:Mark Krikorian
“Another agency - the IRS - did not do as well under Republicans who control Congress. The IRS is largely flatlined in their spending, but they did get about 300 million more funding. But I can only be used to help people pay their taxes and answer questions. It can't be used for any other purpose.” PeopleWellsI CanHelpingUsedPurposeAnswersPayMillionsRepublicanTaxesCongressSpendingAgencyFundingIrs Author:Susan Davis
“Suppose that throughout your childhood you were good with numbers. Other kids used to copy your homework. You figured store discounts faster than your parents. People came to you for help with such things. So you took accounting and eventually became a tax auditor for the IRS. What an embarrassing job, right? You feel you should be writing poetry or doing aviation mechanics or whatever. But then you realize that tax collecting can be a calling too.” PeopleFeelsShouldWritingHelpingKidsJobsUsedParentRealizingNumbersChildhoodCallingTaxesStoresFasterYour ChildrenAviationCopiesEmbarrassingMechanicCollectingHomeworkAccountingIrsDiscountsWriting PoetryAuditors Author:James Hillman
“In 1848, Karl Marx said, a progressive income tax is needed to transfer wealth and power to the state. Thus, Marx's Communist Manifesto had as its major economic tenet a progressive income tax. ... I say it is time to replace the progressive income tax with a national retail sales tax, and it is time to abolish the IRS.” SaidStatesWealthEconomicNeededTaxesMajorsIncomeProgressiveCommunistTransfersIncome TaxAbolishRetailIrsManifestosCommunist ManifestoSales TaxRetail Sales Author:James Traficant
“Most people don't know this, but if you settle a debt for less than the amount you owed, you are potentially responsible for taxes on the forgiven debt. Look at it this way: You received goods and services for the full amount of debt, but you're only paying for a portion of it - sometimes less than 50%. Anything more than $600 is generally considered taxable, but the IRS will sometimes waive the tax if you can prove that your assets were less than your liabilities when the debt was settled.” PeopleIfsKnowsWayLooksSometimesAmountProveTaxesResponsibleDebtSettlingGoodsAssetsPortionsForgivenLiabilityIrsGoods And Services Author:Jean Chatzky
“Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages.” AmericaPayLibertyProgressTaxesHumorousProfoundAverageInsaneWagesTaxationIncome TaxIrsTax DayPaying TaxesTaxes FunnyProperty Taxes Author:H. L. Mencken
“1913 wasn't a very good year. 1913 gave us the income tax, the 16th amendment and the IRS.” YearsTaxesVery GoodIncomeAmendmentsIncome TaxIrsGood Years Author:Ron Paul
“Anybody who is familiar with the historical data from the IRS knows that raising income tax rates will likely actually reduce federal revenues.” KnowsTaxesHistoricalRateIncomeFamiliarDataRevenueIncome TaxIrs Author:Mike Pence