Best wife & ex-wife Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings

“The reality is that I surround myself with very smart, very strong people - including my ex-wives.”

People Reality Strong Wife Smart Including Surround Very Strong Exes Very Smart Strong People Ex Wife

“I want my ex-wife and children to be happy.”

“To his ex-wife in court, he said I lost interest in you when the Botox lost its effect and you looked like a plastic doll that escaped from a fire.”

Said Lost Interest Fire Wife Effects Court Plastic Exes Scorn Dolls Botox Ex Wife His Ex

Author:Peter Jackson

“Other than his ex-wife and despite appearances with a series of cultivated blondes, Edward de Bono has never publicly aligned himself with a woman. 'I’m looking for a fat, cross-eyed hunchback,' he explains, stifling a giggle. 'A prosthetic hump would do.' His delight evaporates when asked about his three grandchildren. 'Am I a doting grandfather?' He pauses. 'I’m a … something grandfather, yes.' The fact that De Bono remains unperturbed by this lack betrays an emotionally austere childhood, and his passions for play, toys, and bad jokes tell of the same deprivation.”

“Besides Bob Satterfield, the only ones who ever hurt me were my ex-wives.”

Hurt Wife Bob Exes Hurt Me Ex Wife

Author:Jake LaMotta

“My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.”

People Play Wish Wife Taught Broken Golf Exes Ex Wife

Author:Bruce Lansky

“She sounds like a screeching ex-wife.”

Sound Wife Stupid Exes Hateful Ex Wife

Author:Rush Limbaugh

“My second ex-wife was really kind of like a ship passing in the night. Only she turned out to be the Exxon Valdez.”

Kind Night Wife Passing Passings Ships Exes Love And Marriage Ex Wife

Author:James Woods

“An ex-wife is a woman with a crick in the neck from looking back over her shoulder at her matrimony.”

Wife Divorce Shoulders Necks Looking Back Exes Matrimony Ex Wife

Book:Ex-wife

Source: Ex-wife

“I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock n roll and ex-wives. In that order.”

Order Jesus Wife Influence Rocks Rock N Roll Exes Ex Wife

Author:Sam Kinison

“All my life there's always been an ex-wife or a girlfriend.”

Wife Girlfriend Exes Ex Wife

Author:Ronnie Wood

“Newt Gingrich had a horrible week in the Iowa caucuses. Only 13 percent of his ex-wives voted for him.”

Wife Week Percent Horrible Exes Iowa Newts Caucus Ex Wife His Ex

Author:David Letterman

“Tonight was the CNN primary debate with the four remaining candidates. It was kind of a change for Newt Gingrich. Usually when he's arguing with three people at once, it's his wife, his ex-wife, and his mistress.”

People Kind Three Four Wife Arguing Debate Primaries Candidates Tonight Exes Mistress Cnn Newts Ex Wife His Ex

Author:Jay Leno

“You will not easily get a man to believe that his carnal love for the woman he has made his wife is as high a love as that he feltfor his mother or sister.”

Men Believe Made Mother Sex Wife Sister Ex Wife

Book:Delphi Works of D.H. Lawrence (Illustrated)

Source: Delphi Works of D.H. Lawrence (Illustrated)

“What women look for in a man: Breathing, IQ over 80, weight under 550 pounds, fewer than six ex-wives. What men look for in a woman: Pia Zadora as she was ten years ago.”

Men Years Looks Women Wife Ten Six Years Ago Weight Breathing Pounds Fewer Exes Ex Wife

Author:Cathy Crimmins

“You ask me about my ex-wife? That is not polite. But I will answer. I got another wife now. Much younger, much nicer, much prettier. And so much more intelligent than Benetton.'”

Asks Answers Wife Intelligent Ask Me Polite Exes Ex Wife

Author:Oliviero Toscani

“My parents, my teachers, my friends, my ex-wife-everybody held up a mirror and I accepted the image that came back. Well, it finally dawned on me that my reflection in others' eyes was the truth once removed.”

Wells Eye Parent Teacher Wife Self Esteem Reflection My Friends Mirrors Accepted Esteem Self Respect Exes Ex Wife

Book:Dallas Down

Source: Dallas Down

“I can't go too much into my domestic life because there are ex-wives ready to do me in.”

I Can Too Much Wife Ready Exes Ex Wife Domestic Life

Author:Frank McCourt

“Losing is like my ex-wife... it's a b****, and it takes a bigger man than me to live with it.”

Men Wife Losing Bigger Exes Ex Wife

Author:Don Frye

“There is something about my aura or essence, or whatever, that draws the ex-wife characters to me. I don't seek them out, but people tend to think of me for that particular archetype, or whatever you want to call it, and I don't mind it. I think there is a strength to it.”

People Thinking Want Mind Character Wife Particular Draws Essence Exes Think Of Me Auras Archetype Ex Wife

Author:Natalie Zea

“My ex-wife was a philosophy major at NYU. Yeah, she and I used to have deep philosophical discussions where she would prove that I didn't exist.”

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Author:Woody Allen

“I got a divorce because my ex-wife left me for another woman.”

Left Wife Divorce Exes Another Woman Ex Wife

Author:Woody Allen

“Apparently, there's something hinky about the new iPhones. They're not hooked up right. ... There's a problem with the antenna. They don't like to be held - like my ex-wife.”

Problem Wife Exes Iphone Hooked Ex Wife Antenna

Author:David Letterman

“There was a man named Robert Dear who in court said he was a warrior for the babies, whose ex-wife talked about his Christian beliefs motivating his desire to attack and murder three people, including a police officer, in Colorado.That man is a Christian. He`s an avowed Christian. He appears to have acted on those Christian beliefs to undertake that act of violence.”

People Men Said Christian Desire Three Belief Wife Violence Baby Murder Police Court Including Dear Warrior Officers Exes Police Officer Colorado Acts Of Violence Ex Wife

Author:Chris Hayes

“And me having kids, with my family history? My mom: mentally ill, shot and killed her last husband. My father: six ex-wives, four heart attacks. Both of my parents think alcohol is a food group.”

Thinking Heart Kids Lasts Father Parent Four Wife Groups Mom Husband Six Shots My Family Ill My Mom Alcohol Exes Family History Heart Attack Mentally Ill Having Kids Ex Wife

Author:Christopher Titus

“My ex-wife, she really didn't like the material that I did. And that's something I regret, that I wasn't more careful about making sure that she was O.K. with it. I just sort of didn't ask. So that's how that goes.”

Asks Wife Materials Regret Careful Exes I Regret Ex Wife

Author:Louis C. K.

“I just don't like when there's a rumor that says I'm dating someone who is below my standards. But when I got divorced, my ex-wife said I was spending all my time with Lindsay Lohan and Angelina Jolie. I was like, 'Thank you for the big ups!'”

Said Bigs Wife Standards Dating Spending My Time Exes Divorced Rumor Ex Wife Dating Someone

Author:Marilyn Manson

“In my divorce, I stood up and said to my ex-wife, 'Hey, I messed up. This had nothing to do with you. I didn't understand what marriage was. I cheated. I was wrong. We couldn't fix it; it got worse. I stepped away because I didn't want it to get any worse. You're the mother of my kids - I don't want to hate you.'”

Want Said Kids Mother Hate Wife Divorce Hey Hate You Exes Cheated Stood Up Messed Up Ex Wife I Cheated

Author:Kevin Hart

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