“I saw a commercial for an above-ground pool, it was 30 seconds long. Because that's the maximum amount of time you can picture yourself having fun in an above-ground pool. If it was 31 seconds, the actor would say "The water is only up to here? What do I do now? Throw the ball back to Jimmy? Or put some goggles on and look at his feet?"” IfsLooksLongHumorFunnyActorsFunWaterSawsFeetAmountBallsHaving FunSecondsPoolMaximumJimmyGoggles Author:Mitch Hedberg
“The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.” CountryHumorFunnyAmountSouthIronyShirtsRegionsT Shirt Author:David Cross
“In show business, it takes 10 years to create an overnight success. You've heard that, right? But what you don't hear is that that's the exact same amount of time it takes to create a bitter failure.” YearsShowsHumorFunnyHeardAmountBitterShow BusinessOvernight Success Author:Marc Maron
“So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said 'I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said Hundreds & thousands?' I said 'We'll start with one.' He said 'Knickerbocker glory?' I said 'I do get a certain amount of freedom in these trousers, yes.'” WantSaidHumorFunnyCertainAmountGloryLocalsIceShopsCreamIce CreamTrousers Author:Tim Vine
“'Understanding' art is like having a sense of humour - if you don't have one, no amount of explanation is going to make you laugh.” IfsArtHumorUnderstandingLaughingHumourAmountLaughterArt IsPainterExplanationSense Of HumorMake You LaughLack Of UnderstandingArt Appreciation Author:Michael Craig-Martin