“You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.” IfsBookHumorMightFunnyValuesComedyBlueGasTruckUp And DownRedneckBlue EyesYou Might Be A Redneck IfRedneck HumorFunny RedneckBlue Book Author:Jeff Foxworthy
“I don't know how to fix a car. If the car breaks down, and the gas tank does not say "E", I'm screwed. But if the gas tank says "E", I get all cocky - "I've got this one, don't worry." So I get out the toolbox AKA wallet.” IfsKnowsDoeHumorFunnyBreakWorryKnow HowCarDown AndGasBreaking DownTanksCockyWalletsToolboxAka Author:Mitch Hedberg
“My father would pass gas and then blame it on imaginary animals.” HumorFunnyFatherAnimalBlameGasImaginary Author:Bill Cosby
“Daddy pays for the water, daddy pays for the gas, daddy pays for the electricity, and if daddy didn't pay for the electricity, he'd pay for the candle on your nightstand, so you can study for the big test tomorrow.” IfsHumorBigsFunnyWaterPayStudyTomorrowTestsGasCandleElectricityDaddy Author:Chris Rock
“I was in the Far East and I went into a restaurant and I ordered octopus and the waiter said: "It takes four hours." I asked why and he said: "It keeps turning off the gas."” SaidHumorFunnyHoursFourEastRestaurantsGasWaiterOctopus Author:Frank Carson
“No parents. You have Uncle Jesse, forever in overalls. Then there's Bo and Duke. What do they do? I never saw them working for food or gas money. You can only kill so many possum.” HumorFunnyParentForeverSawsGasUnclesDukesOverallsPossumsGas Money Author:Bill Engvall