“Look at the Metropolitan Community Church today, the gay church, almost accepted into the World Council of Churches. Almost, the vote was against them. But they will try again and again until they get in, and the tragedy is that they would get one vote. Because they are spoken of here in Jude as being brute beasts, that is going to the baser lust of the flesh to live immorally, and so Jude describes this as apostasy. But thank God this vile and satanic system will one day be utterly annihilated and there'll be a celebration in heaven.” WorldTryingLooksHumorTodayHeavenCommunityChurchReligiousGayOne DayVoteTragedyFleshAcceptedLustBeastThank GodCelebrationAgain And AgainCouncilBrutesTry AgainSatanicMetropolitanChurch TodayApostasy Author:Jerry Falwell
“My whole family thinks I'm gay, I guess it's always been that way. Maybe it's 'cause of the way that I walk, Makes them think I like... boys.” ThinkingWayWholeHumorFunnyCausesWalksBoysGayWhole FamilyLike A Boy Author:Bo Burnham
“I have no idea why gay men love me, but I would have to assume it's because they know how much I love the gays! Everyone needs a good gay man in their life.” KnowsMenNeedsIdeasHumorFunnyKnow HowGayAssumingNo IdeaGay Men Author:Chelsea Handler
“I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.” HumorFunnyLove YouGayDesignerGenesLove You LikeI Love You Like Author:Bo Burnham
“And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.” IfsMenHumorFunnyGayTenPercentTwentiesChosenChineseKneesOddsFree Time Author:Bo Burnham
“I'm gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.” HumorFunnyFacesJesusGracePleaseGayAim Author:Bo Burnham
“I'm sitting in the bus station, minding my own business, reading 'Ta-Da!' magazine; a magazine by and for gay magicians, but that's a different story.” DifferentStoriesHumorFunnyReadingMy OwnGaySittingMagazinesStationsBusMagicianOwn BusinessMinding My Own Business Author:Dave Attell
“I'm sorry, was that homophobic? No--I think it was, 'cause I hear that a lot. Dave, What?, You're talking about being gay. You probably secretly are gay. And I'm like listen voice in my head, I'm not! HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT? HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT? I know I wouldn't like it, other scarier voice in my head! 'Cause one time while making a sandwich, a cucumber went up my ass. Three times.” ThinkingKnowsHumorFunnyThreeCausesVoiceTalkingGaySorryAssDo You KnowOne TimeI'm SorryThree TimesSandwichesDaveBeing GayHomophobicCucumbersVoices In My Head Author:Dave Attell
“I really don't have a problem with gay marriage... because I'm tolerant and rational.” ProblemHumorFunnyGayRationalGay Marriage Author:David Cross
“I'm in a weird position, because I like rainbows, but I'm not gay. So whenever I go out wearing a rainbow shirt, I have to put "Not gay." But I'm not against gays, so under that I'll have to put "... but supportive." It's weird how one group of people took refracted light. That's very greedy, gays.” PeopleHumorLightFunnyGroupsPositionGayShirtsRainbowGreedySupportive Author:Demetri Martin
“I went to a gay bar, they wanted proof of sex so I showed them, they said it wasn't enough.” SaidEnoughHumorWantedFunnySexGayProofBarsThey Said Author:Rodney Dangerfield
“You know how some people have gay-dar? I have fat-dar. I can automatically tell if you're fat or not. And I also have cerebral-palsy-dar.” PeopleIfsKnowsI CanHumorFunnyKnow HowGayFatsCerebralCerebral Palsy Author:Zach Galifianakis
“I mean if you two were to make love, that would be gay. Two men touching each other physically and emotionally...erotically caressing each other...on the hood of a car...or the back of a movie theater.” IfsMenMeanTwoHumorWould BeFunnyCarGayTheaterTouchingMaking LoveHoodMovie Theater Author:Kristen Schaal
“You can't just go gay, its not like buying a ladder.” HumorFunnyGayBuyingLadders Author:Noel Fielding