“When action grows unprofitable, gather information; when information grows unprofitable, sleep.” HumorActionFunnyGrowsSleepActingInformationLeft Hand Author:Ursula K. Le Guin
“Growing up as a girl is always traumatizing, especially when you have the deadly combination of greasy skin and getting your boobs at ten. But I think it's good to grow up that way. It builds character.” ThinkingWayCharacterHumorFunnyGirlGrowsGrowing UpGrowingTenSkinsCombination Author:Tina Fey
“The difference between farce and humour in literature is, I suppose, that farce strums louder and louder on one string, while humour varies its note, changes its key, grows and spreads and deepens until it may indeed reach tragic depths.” MayHumorFunnyLiteratureGrowsDifferencesHumourKeysNotesDepthSpreadTragicStringsVaryFarce Book:In My Good Books Source: In My Good Books
“My kid wants to be a prison warden when he grows up so he can put thumb tacks on the electric chairs.” WantHumorKidsFunnyGrowsFamilyGrowing UpPrisonChairsElectricThumbsWardensElectric Chair Author:Rodney Dangerfield
“I got an ant farm. Them fellas didn't grow anything. Hey, how about some celery? Plus, if I tore your legs off, you would look like snowmen.” IfsLooksHumorFunnyGrowsLegsHeyPlusFarmsAntsFellasSnowmanCelery Author:Mitch Hedberg
“[On the Dating Handbook] 'With a telescope, some munchies, and a warm blanket, watch for Halley's comet.' Yeah. I like that. There's no time limit. Just sit there and grow old together.” HumorFunnyTogetherGrowsWatchesLimitsYeahWarmBlanketTelescopesCometsTime LimitHalley's Comet Author:David Cross
“He has no idea what it was like to grow up in the South, where you had to hold your head down.” IdeasHumorFunnyGrowsGrowing UpSouthNo Idea Author:Fred Allen
“My daughters been picked up so many times she's starting to grow handles” HumorFunnyGrowsDaughterStartingHandleMy Daughter Author:Rodney Dangerfield
“When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.” PeopleHumorFunnyGrowsWhiteGrowing UpCollegeAsianPackingFudge Author:Adam Carolla
“The torture that they are coming up with in China is so creative. They have this other method where they'll take a bamboo and they'll plant it in your anus and just let it grow. So patient. Man, watch out for China, I say. They have all the ambition as we do but none of the heart.” MenHeartHumorFunnyGrowsWatchesCreativeAmbitionMethodPlantPatientChinaTortureBambooAnus Author:Kristen Schaal