“I have no problems with buying tampons. I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a "proper" present. "Happy birthday, mum!"” MenProblemHumorFunnyModernBuyingMumNo ProblemModern ManTampons Author:Jimmy Carr
“My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike.” HumorFunnyAsksGivenSexNiceDoorsAdviceDadMy DadUpsetMumSecretaryBedroomBikeBest TimesBest Advice Author:Jimmy Carr
“A 66-YEAR-OLD woman has become the oldest new mum in Britain after giving birth to a baby boy. I'm amazed she needed to have a caesarean section though, you'd think at 66 she would have needed some masking tape down there just to stop it falling out.” ThinkingGivingYearsHumorFunnyFallBoysBabyBirthNeededBritainTapeMumAmazedSectionsOld WomanGiving BirthBaby Boy Author:Frankie Boyle
“When I left home, my mum said "Don't forget to write", I thought, "That's unlikely"... It's a basic skill isn't it.” WritingSaidHomeHumorFunnyLeftForgetSkillsMumUnlikely Author:Tim Vine
“So I told my mum that I'd opened a theatre. She said, "Are you having me on?" I said, "Well I'll give you an audition, but I'm not promising you anything."” GivingWellsSaidHumorFunnyTheatreMumAuditions Author:Tim Vine
“Dulwich College takes me back after seventy years: My Mum must have written one hell of a sick note!” YearsHumorFunnyHellWrittenCollegeSickNotesTake MeMumSeventiesTake Me Back Author:Bob Monkhouse