“A dog came to my door, so I gave him a bone, the dog took the bone into the back yard and buried it. I'm going to go plant a tree there, with bones on it, then the dog will come back and say, "Shoot! It worked! I must distribute these bones equally for I have a green paw!"” HumorFunnyDoorsTreeDogGreenPlantBonesBuriedYardsPawsPlant A Tree Author:Mitch Hedberg
“I'm a mumbler. If I'm walking with a friend, and I say something, he says, "What?" So I say it again, and he says, "What?" Really, it's just some insignificant stuff I'm saying, but now I'm yelling, "That tree is far away!"” IfsHumorFunnyStuffTreeWalkingFar AwayInsignificantYelling Author:Mitch Hedberg
“I cannot tell you what hotel I'm staying at, but there are two trees involved.” TwoHumorFunnyTreeInvolvedHotelStayingTwo Trees Author:Mitch Hedberg
“I just think it's difficult for them to see the forest for the trees right now, which I can't blame them for, given the circumstances they found themselves in.” ThinkingI CanHumorFunnyFoundGivenDifficultTreeCircumstancesRight NowBlameForests Author:Denis Leary
“When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!" One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun.” HumorKidsFunnyUsedParentSunSawsNiceWonderfulDoorsTreeStrangeFlowerOne DayGrassWonderful ThingsCellarsEmo Author:Emo Philips
“I hit two trees and fell down a ditch. And that was just walking from the lodge.” TwoHumorFunnyTreeWalkingLodgesTwo Trees Author:Bill Engvall
“The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.” PeopleHumorFunnySawsTreeFrontsWalkingShadowStandingWoodsCandleRabbits Author:Steven Wright