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One Day Quotes

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One Day Quotes

“The whole city gives you the impression of impermanence. You have the feeling that one day someone is going to yell, "Cut! Strike it!" and then the stagehands will scurry out and remove the mountains, the movie-star homes, the Hollywood Bowl--everything.”

Giving Whole Feelings Home Funny Stars Cities Cutting One Day Mountain Hollywood Strikes Impression Remove Los Angeles Bowls Movie Star Impermanence

Author:Allan Sherman

“My mother made us eat all sorts of vitamins and supplements, until one day I nearly choked on part of The Sunday Times.”

Made Humor Funny Mother One Day Sunday Vitamins Supplements

Author:Milton Jones

“When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!" One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun.”

Humor Kids Funny Used Parent Sun Saws Nice Wonderful Doors Tree Strange Flower One Day Grass Wonderful Things Cellars Emo

Author:Emo Philips

“God doesn't seem to talk to people like he used to. Who's he talking to now? I don't know. Then I'm walking down the street in Manhattan one day, and I realize maybe it's those guys you see walking down the street talking to themselves. You know, those guys that are like, 'I can't! No, I can't!' Maybe the other side of that conversation is God going, 'You're the new leader.' 'No I can't!' They're not crazy - they're reluctant prophets.”

People Knows I Can Humor Seems Funny Used Guy Sides Realizing Talking Leader Crazy Streets Walking One Day Conversation Prophet Manhattan Reluctant

Author:Marc Maron

“I come home from work early one day, and I see a guy jogging down the street in his underwear. I ask him, "Why are you jogging in your underwear?" He says, "You came home from work early".”

Home Humor Funny Guy Asks Streets One Day Coming Home Underwear Jogging

Author:Rodney Dangerfield

“Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'”

Men Humor Funny Girl Asks One Day My Friends Ask Me That Girl One Day At A Time

Author:Adam Ferrara

“One day, when I came home from work, I accidentally put my car key in the door of my apartment building. I turned it, and the whole building started up. So I drove it around. A policeman stopped me for going too fast. He said, "Where do you live?" I said, "Right here!" Then I drove my building onto the middle of a highway, and I ran outside, and told all of the cars to get the hell out of my driveway.”

Said Whole Home Humor Funny Hell Doors Middle Car Building Keys One Day Ran Apartment Highways Policemen Driveway Car Keys

Author:Steven Wright

“The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.”

Source: The Wit and Wisdom of Abraham Lincoln

“There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.”

Life Humor Inspiration Funny Political Politics Ought One Day Seasons Just One Senators Political Will Best Political Open Season

Author:Will Rogers

“I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.”

Inspirational Philosophy Funny Change One Day Anxiety Humorous Witty Dread Peanuts Sweet Love One Day At A Time Off The Wall Living One Day At A Time Take It One Day At A Time Snoopy Take One Day At A Time

Author:Charles M. Schulz

“I wear black skinny-fit jeans - I can't get away from them. It's funny because I wore baggy jeans for ages, then one day my friend convinced me to try on a skinny pair and I thought they were great.”

Trying I Can Age Funny Black Fit One Day My Friends Convinced Pairs Get Away Jeans Skinny

Author:Shaun White

“I abhor averages. I like the individual case. A man may have six meals one day and none the next, making an average of three meals per day, but that is not a good way to live.”

Men Way May Funny Three Next Individual Cases Food One Day Six Humorous Average Meals Statistics Good Day Good Way Way To Live

Author:Louis D. Brandeis

“I try to take it one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.”

Trying Sometimes Humor Funny Success Women One Day Stress Stress Relief Stress Management One Day At A Time Reduce Stress Life Stress Living One Day At A Time Take It One Day At A Time Funny Stress Inspirational Stress Take One Day At A Time

Author:Ashleigh Brilliant