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Famous Jeff Foxworthy Quotes
“You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.”
“You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.”
“You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.”
“You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.”
“You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.”
“You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.”
“You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.”
“You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.”
“You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.”
“You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.”
“You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.”
“You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.”
“You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.”
“You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.”
“You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.”
“You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.”
“You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.”
“You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.”
“You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.”
“You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.”
“You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.”
“You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.”
“You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.”
“You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.”
“You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.”
“You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.”
“You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.”
“If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy.”
“To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country.”
“It seems like movies that have heart to them always do well, and they find their audience.”