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Famous Jeff Foxworthy Quotes
“If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.”
“If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.”
“If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.”
“If you have more fish on your wall than pictures, you might be a redneck.”
“If your idea of a 7 course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack, you might be a redneck.”
“If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.”
“You might be a redneck if the UFO hotline limits you to one call a day.”
“You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!”
“You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.”
“You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.”
“You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.”
“You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.”
“You might be a redneck if you've ever stolen toilet paper from a public restroom.”
“You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.”
“You might be a redneck if you work with a shirt off... and so does your husband.”
“You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.”
“You might be a redneck if there are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.”
“You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.”
“You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.”
“You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.”
“You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine.”
“You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.”
“You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.”
“You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.”
“You might be a redneck if your satellite dish payment delays buying school clothes for the kids.”
“You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.”
“You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.”
“You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.”
“You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.”
“You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.”
“You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.”
“You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather.”
“You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.”
“You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.”
“You might be a redneck if you have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.”
“You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.”
“You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.”
“You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.”
“You might be a redneck if Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair.”