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Cameras Quotes

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Cameras Quotes

“If you buy your husband or boyfriend a video camera, for the first few weeks he has it, lock the door when you go to the bathroom. Most of my husband's early films end with a scream and a flush.”

Ifs Men Firsts Ends Humor Funny Film Doors Week Husband Cameras Video My Husband Scream Locks Bathroom Your Husband Video Cameras

Author:Rita Rudner

“You can't have a bad time at Disney World. It's not allowed. They have hidden electronic surveillance cameras everywhere, and if they catch you failing to laugh with childlike wonder, they lock you inside a costume representing a beloved Disney character such as Goofy and make you walk about in the Florida heat getting grabbed and leaped on by violently excited children until you have learned your lesson.”

Source: Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need

“One time the power went out in my house and I had to use the flash on my camera to see my way around. I made a sandwich and took fifty pictures of my face. The neighbors thought there was lightning in my house.”

Way Made Use Humor Funny Faces House Cameras Neighbor My Way Fifty One Time Flash Lightning Sandwiches

Author:Steven Wright

“The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.”

Funny Humorous Cameras Witty Invention Digital I'm Sorry Reminiscing Digital Cameras Great Inventions

Author:Demetri Martin

“Police in Washington D.C. are now using cameras to catch drivers who go through red lights. Many congressmen this week opposed the use of the red light cameras incorrectly assuming they were being used for surveillance at local brothels.”

Use Humor Light Funny Used Comedy Week Red Police Cameras Assuming Locals Drivers Policemen Surveillance Congressman Brothels Red Lights Surveillance Cameras

Author:Dennis Miller

“When you hand someone a camera, why do they act like you just asked them to dissemble a bomb? They take it and they're like, 'What do I do ... I don't really ... ha-huh ...' Yeah, it's the button on the top right where it always is since the beginning of #*@! time!”

Inspirational Hands Funny Like You Travel Cameras Yeah Silly Bombs Buttons Funny Travel

Author:Dane Cook

“It's more important for a photographer to have very good shoes, than to have a very good camera”

Important Funny Photography Cameras Photographer Shoes Very Good Ironic Good Shoes

Author:Sebastiao Salgado

“If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.”

Ifs Helping Funny Advice Police Cameras Video Comedian Help Me Beaten Video Cameras Funny Comedian

Author:Bobcat Goldthwait

“I was on the yearbook staff, so I would take out film cameras and Nikons and take photos around school and at sporting events and things like that. We had a darkroom as well. I just loved it. I also saved up for a video camera to video my friends and cut and paste the videos together and I gave them to all of my friends for graduation.”

Inspirational Wells School Funny Together Film Cutting Events My Friends Cameras Saved Video Staff Graduation Sporting Events Video Cameras Yearbook Darkroom Nikon

Author:Dianna Agron

“I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see a photo opportunity of a fish that I have never seen.”

Humor Funny Lasts Opportunity Cases Minutes Car Rivers Cameras Fishes Crash Underwater Last Minute

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“One time a guy handed me a picture. He said, 'Here's a picture of me when I was younger.' Every picture is of you when you were younger. 'Here's a picture of me when I'm older.' 'You son of bit, how'd you pull that off Let me see that camera. What's it look like'”

Looks Said Humor Funny Guy Bits Son Let Me Cameras One Time

Author:Mitch Hedberg