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“No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be; Am an attendant lord, one that will do To swell a progress, start a scene or two, Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool, Deferential, glad to be of use, Politic, cautious, and meticulous; Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse; At times, indeed, almost ridiculous— Almost, at times, the Fool.”

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Author:T. S. Eliot
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“The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around. If you write about someone else, you can stretch the truth from here to Finland. If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.”

IfsWritingMayBookFunnyRealizingTroubleFoolHonorHumorousWittyDirtyLiarsAbout YourselfThievesAutobiographyWriting A BookDeviationFinlandHonor Among Thieves
Book:Groucho And Me
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“Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!”

MenYearsWellsLittlesReasonAgeWomenRealizingFoolSmartPraiseHotBuyingYellowMilkCowsPantsPigsApologizingMultitudesStunningWaitressSausageRelicsReciprocalI ApologizeUpdates
Author:Andy Rooney
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“There was once a little girl who was so very intelligent that her parents feared that she would die. But an aged aunt, who had crossed the Atlantic in a sailing-vessel, said, 'My dears, let her marry the first man she falls in love with, and she will make such a fool of herself that it will probably save her life.”

MenFirstsLittlesSaidDiesFallGirlParentFoolIntelligentFalling In LoveSailingAuntVessel
Book:Collected Stories, 1891-1910
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“I have always thought it rather interesting to follow the involuntary movements of fear in clever people. Fools coarsely display their cowardice in all its nakedness, but the others are able to cover it with a veil so delicate, so daintily woven with small plausible lies, that there is some pleasure to be found in contemplating this ingenious work of the human intelligence.”

PeopleHumansAbleLyingFoundPleasureInterestingMovementFoolCleverDelicateCowardiceDisplayContemplatingVeilsWovenIngeniousPlausibleInvoluntaryHuman Intelligence
Book:Recollections
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“He was free, free in every way, free to behave like a fool or a machine, free to accept, free to refuse, free to equivocate; to marry, to give up the game, to drag this death weight about with him for years to come. He could do what he liked, no one had the right to advise him, there would be for him no Good or Evil unless he thought them into being.”

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Author:Jean-Paul Sartre
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“When at the typewriter I am no longer where I site but am away across the mountains, in ancient cities or on the Great Plains among the buffalo. Often I think of what pitiful fools are those who use mind-altering drugs to seek feelings they do not have, each drug taking a little more from what they have of mind, leaving them a little less. Give the brain encouragement from study, from thinking, from visualizing, and no drugs are needed.”

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Book:Education of a Wandering Man
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“This is the most important thing I will ever say to you. The human mind is the ultimate testing device. You can take all the notes you want on the technical data, anything you forget you can look up again, but this must be engraved on your hearts in letters of fire. There is nothing, nothing, nothing, more important to me in the men and women I train than their absolute personal integrity. Whether you function as welders or inspectors, the laws of physics are implacable lie detectors. You may fool men. You will never fool metal. That’s all.”

MenWantMindHumansLooksHeartMayImportantLawLyingForgetFireFoolIntegrityMen And WomenLettersUltimateFunctionAbsolutesImportant ThingsTrainNotesPhysicsDataLook UpDevicesHuman MindMetalsTestingForget YouLaws Of PhysicsInspectorsEngravedPersonal Integrity
Author:Lois McMaster Bujold
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“Petruchio: Come, come, you wasp; i' faith, you are too angry. Katherine: If I be waspish, best beware my sting. Petruchio: My remedy is then, to pluck it out. Katherine: Ay, if the fool could find where it lies. Petruchio: Who knows not where a wasp does wear his sting? In his tail. Katherine: In his tongue. Petruchio: Whose tongue? Katherine: Yours, if you talk of tails: and so farewell. Petruchio: What, with my tongue in your tail? Nay, come again, Good Kate; I am a gentleman.”

IfsKnowsDoeLyingFoolAngryTongueGentlemanRemedyTailsFarewellKatePluckWaspsTaming Of The ShrewShrews
Author:William Shakespeare
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“This is the excellent foppery of the world, that, when we are sick in fortune,--often the surfeit of our own behavior,--we make guilty of our disasters the sun, the moon, and the stars: as if we were villains by necessity; fools by heavenly compulsion; knaves, thieves, and treachers, by spherical predominance; drunkards, liars, and adulterers, by an enforced obedience of planetary influence; and all that we are evil in, by a divine thrusting on: an admirable evasion of whoremaster man, to lay his goatish disposition to the charge of a star.”

IfsMenWorldEvilStarsSunInfluenceDivineFoolMoonBehaviorSickLaysFortuneDisasterGuiltyObedienceExcellentHeavenlyLiarsVillainThievesDispositionAstrologyCompulsionAdmirableDrunkardsLearKnavesEvasionSun Moon And StarsStars And Planets
Author:William Shakespeare
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“Traveling is a fool's paradise. Our first journeys discover to us the indifference of places. At home I dream that at Naples, at Rome, I can be intoxicated with beauty, and lose my sadness. I pack my trunk, embrace my friends, embark on the sea, and at last wake up in Naples, and there beside me is the stern fact, the sad self, unrelenting, identical, that I fled from. I seek the Vatican, and the palaces. I affect to be intoxicated with sights and suggestions, but I am not intoxicated. My giant goes with me wherever I go.”

FirstsI CanSelfFactsHomeDreamLastsLosesJourneySeaSadnessFoolMy FriendsSightWake UpEmbraceIndifferenceGiantsParadiseRomePacksSuggestionsPalacesIdenticalTrunksIntoxicatedUnrelentingNaples
Book:Essays by Ralph Waldo Emerson: Easyread Comfort Edition
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“...I give you the mausoleum of all hope and desire...I give it to you not that you may remember time, but that you might forget it now and then for a moment and not spend all of your breath trying to conquer it. Because no battle is ever won he said. They are not even fought. The field only reveals to man his own folly and despair, and victory is an illusion of philosophers and fools.”

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Author:William Faulkner
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“A woman may possess the wisdom and chastity of Minerva, and we give no heed to her, if she has a plain face. What folly will not a pair of bright eyes make pardonable? What dullness may not red lips are sweet accents render pleasant? And so, with their usual sense of justice, ladies argue that because a woman is handsome, therefore she is a fool. O ladies, ladies! there are some of you who are neither handsome nor wise.”

IfsGivingMayEyeFacesJusticeWiseSweetFoolRedLipsArguingPleasantFollyPairsUsualAccentsHandsomeHeedChastityDullnessRed LipsBright EyesMinerva
Book:Vanity Fair
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“The last word in ignorance is the man who says of an animal or plant, "What good is it?" If the land mechanism as a whole is good, then every part is good, whether we understand it or not. If the biota, in the course of aeons, has built something we like but do not understand, then who but a fool would discard seemingly useless parts? To keep every cog and wheel is the first precaution of intelligent tinkering.”

IfsMenFirstsWholeLastsCoursesAnimalLandIgnoranceFoolBuiltIntelligentPlantUselessWheelsMechanismLast WordsPrecautionCogsTinkeringLand Conservation
Book:Round River
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