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Humor Quotes

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Humor Quotes

“Humor and laughter are not necessarily the same thing. Humor permits us to see into life from a fresh and gracious perspective. We learn to take ourselves more lightly in the presence of good humor. Humor gives us the strength to bear what cannot be changed, and the sight to see the human under the pompous.”

Giving Humans Humor Changed Perspective Bears Laughter Sight Permit Gracious Pompous Good Humor Humor And Laughter

Author:Joan D. Chittister

“humor bears the closest relation to emotion, either bubbling up as from a deep and happy wellspring, or in an opposite fashion rising like a re-birth of feeling from dead levels after turmoil.”

Feelings Humor Levels Emotion Fashion Bears Birth Opposites Relation Rising Closest Turmoil Wellspring

Author:Constance Rourke

“Our democratic faith is more than the creed of our country, it is the inborn hope of our humanity, an ideal we carry but do not own, a trust we bear and pass along. And even after nearly 225 years, we have a long way yet to travel.”

Way Years Long Country Humor Political Humanity Bears Ideals Democratic Our Country Creeds Long Way Political Humor

Author:George W. Bush

“And, I know that I'll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad.”

Knows Littles Helping Humor School Religious Millions Baby Bears Mad Court Burden Gods Will Innocent Throwing Squares Court System

Author:Jerry Falwell

“Stupid National Anthem... Look at this flag; Two bears fighting over a pineapple. What kind of message does that send to the world? "Come to Belarus, where wild animals will steal your fruit."”

World Looks Kind Doe Two Humor Funny Fighting Animal Stupid Bears Citizens Messages Fruit Stealing Flags Anthem Imitating Wild Animal National Anthem Pineapples Belarus

Author:Bill Bailey

“Remember that the wit, humour, and jokes of most mixed companies are local. They thrive in that particular soil, but will not often bear transplanting.”

Humor Funny Remember Company Humour Particular Bears Jokes Wit Locals Soil Thrive

Book:Lord Chesterfield's Letters

Source: Lord Chesterfield's Letters

“When we were on acid, we would go into the woods, because there was less chance that you would run into an authority figure. But we ran into a bear. My friend Duane was there, raising his right hand, swearing to help prevent forest fires. He told me, "Mitchell, Smokey is way more intense in person!"”

Way Persons Helping Humor Hands Running Funny Chance Fire Figures Bears Authority My Friends Woods Intense Forests Ran Acid Swearing Forest Fires Authority Figures

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I went to England to tell jokes, and I wanted to tell my Smokey the Bear joke, but I had to ask the English people if they knew who Smokey the Bear is. But they don't. In England, Smokey the Bear is not the forest-fire-prevention representative. They have Smackie the Frog. It's a lot like a bear, but it's a frog. And that's a better system, I think we should adopt it. Because bears can be mean, but frogs are always cool. Never has there been a frog hopping toward me and I thought, "Man, I better play dead!"”

People Ifs Thinking Men Should Mean Play Humor Wanted Funny Asks Fire Bears Jokes England Forests Representatives Frogs Prevention Hopping Forest Fires

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“The Second Amendment! It says you have the right to bear arms, or the right to arm bears, whatever the hell you want to do!”

Want Humor Funny Hell Arms Bears Amendments Second Amendment Right To Bear Arms

Author:Robin Williams

“It was a pretty posh place. They were so used to fur coats that two bears strolled in and ordered lunch and nobody even noticed.”

Two Humor Funny Used Bears Lunch Coats Fur Posh Fur Coats

Author:Chic Murray

“Are you recycling? Are you!? You just killed a polar bear! YOU!”

Humor Funny Bears Recycling Polar Bears

Author:Russell Howard