“The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.” MatterHumorFunnyWallTennisDepressingMotivational TennisTennis BallsInspirational TennisFunny TennisTennis Team Author:Mitch Hedberg
“I was going to stay overnight at my friend's house - he said, "you'll have to sleep on the floor." Damn gravity! You don't know how bad I wanted to sleep on the wall.” KnowsSaidHumorWantedFunnyHouseSleepKnow HowWallMy FriendsDamnGravity Author:Mitch Hedberg
“There's a deep fly ball... Winfield goes back, back... his head hits the wall ... it's rolling towards second base.” HumorFunnyWallBaseballBallsRolling Author:Jerry Coleman
“When the boys at school found out I had a potentially fatal peanut allergy, they used to hold me up against a wall and play Russian Roulette with a bag of Revels!” PlayHumorSchoolFunnyUsedFoundBoysWallBagsPeanutsHold MeAllergiesRouletteRussian Roulette Author:Milton Jones
“What was wrong with train toilet doors that just locked, instead of this multiple choice system? If anything goes wrong, you'll be sitting there while the whole toilet wall slowly slides away, unveiling you like a prize on a quiz show. For 500 points, a shitting woman!” IfsWholeShowsHumorFunnyChoicesDoorsWallSittingTrainPrizeLockedMultipleToiletsSlidesAnything GoesQuizMultiple ChoiceUnveilingQuiz Show Author:Frankie Boyle
“Stephen Hawking: Brainier than Kurt Cobain's garage wall.” HumorFunnyWallGarageCobain Author:Frankie Boyle
“Donald, I'm not sure if you're even aware of this, but the only difference between you and Michael Douglas from the movie, Wall Street, is that no one's going to be sad when you get cancer.” IfsHumorFunnyDifferencesStreetsWallCancerNot Sure Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“I took my father on a coach trip last summer.We were halfway there when the driver lost control of the coach, it flew down a hill around a bend and crashed through a brick wall. I wasn't hurt but luckily my father had the presence of mind to kick my head in.” MindHumorFunnyLastsFatherLostHurtWallSummerCoachesHillsKicksDriversBricksHalfwayFlewBrick WallLast SummerPresence Of MindHalfway There Author:Chic Murray