“I had a career before the Stern show, on Mad TV. I was on the first two seasons of that and I got kicked off it because of possession of cocaine.” FirstsTwoShowsCareersTvsSeasonsMadPossessionCocaine Author:Artie Lange
“My mother would say, before I left the house, 'Remember Art, hugs are better than drugs.' And I believed my mother, I believed everything she said - until the first time I got high at a party. I leaned back, and I went, 'God, this is way better than when my Uncle Perry hugs me. What else has my mother been lying to me about?” WayFirstsArtSaidRememberLyingMotherHouseLeftPartyDrugFirst TimeHugUnclesLie To MeHug Me Author:Artie Lange
“Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.” FirstsWebsiteBeing DepressedEarly Death Author:Artie Lange
“I once dealt with a prima donna on a movie set. I won't say who, but his first name is a country. A communist country. Run by Fidel Castro.” FirstsCountryRunningNamesCommunistCastroMovie SetsPrima Donnas Author:Artie Lange
“When political correctness first started coming around, it ruined Andrew Dice Clay and Eddie Murphy's stand-up career. Sam Kinison died at just the right time, 'cause no one was going to tolerate what he was saying anymore either.” FirstsPoliticalCausesCareersDiedTolerateRuinedRight TimeClayPolitical CorrectnessCorrectnessAndrewDiceMurphy Author:Artie Lange
