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Defensive Quotes

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Defensive Quotes

“Playing nice" comes naturally when our neuroception detects safety and promotes physiological states that support social behavior. However, pro-social behavior will not occur when our neuroception misreads the environmental cues and triggers physiological states that support defensive strategies. After all, "playing nice" is not appropriate or adaptive behavior in dangerous or life-threatening situations. In these situations, humans - like other mammals - react with more primitive neurobiological defense systems. To create relationships, humans must subdue these defensive reactions to engage, attach, and form lasting social bonds. Humans have adaptive neurobehavioral systems for both pro-social and defensive behaviors.”

SocialFearTrustDistrustTriggersComplex PtsdDangerous PeopleDefensiveInterpersonal RelationshipsNeurophysiologyPolyvagal TheoryUnsafe People
Book:The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation
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“Soon he essentially stopped talking. "I am retreating into silence as a defensive mode," he mentioned. Eventually, he was down to uttering just five words, and only to guards: yes; no; please; thank you. "I am surprised," he wrote, "by the amount of respect this garners me. That silence intimidates puzzles me. Silence is to me normal, comfortable." Later he added, "I will admit to feeling a little contempt for those who can't keep quiet.”

SilenceTalkingPleaseQuietNormalComfortableRespectWordsContemptThank YouPuzzlesNoYesSurprisedDefensiveGuardsRetreatingIntimidates
Book:The Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit
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“For so many years, I lived my life in a defensive stance, putting up a fight when the only thing I was fighting was my own suffering and the fear that someone would find their way through the armour, to the very tender soul I always was, and destroy me all over again.”

SufferingFightingFearArmourDefensiveTender Soul
Book:Truth Telling: Seven Conversations about Indigenous Life in Canada
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“I need to ask, are you afraid of spiders?" Nicholas blinked, suddenly caught off guard, "Yes, I'm afraid of spiders." "Were you always?" "What are you, a psychiatrist?" Pritam took a breath. He could feel Laine's eyes on him, appraising his line of questioning. "Is it possible that the trauma of losing your best friend as a child and the trauma of losing your wife as an adult and the trauma of seeing Laine's husband take his life in front of you just recently..." Pritam shrugged and raised his palms, "You see where I'm going?" Nicholas looked at Laine. She watched back. Her gray eyes missed nothing. "Sure," agreed Nicholas, standing. "And my sister's nuts, too, and we both like imagining that little white dogs are big nasty spiders because our daddy died and we never got enough cuddles." "Your father died?" asked Laine. "When?" "Who cares?" Pritam sighed. "You must see this from our point of - " "I'd love to!" snapped Nicholas. "I'd love to see it from your point of view, because mine is not that much fun! It's insane! It's insane that I see dead people, Pritam! It's insane that this," he flicked out the sardonyx necklace,"stopped me from kidnapping a little girl!" "That's what you believe," Pritam said carefully. "That's what I fucking believe!" Nicholas stabbed his finger through the air at the dead bird talisman lying slack on the coffee table.”

MindDeathLossGriefAngerMurderSuicideSarcasmSanityQuestioningInsultedChildhood TraumaAnalyzingTraumatic ExperiencesDefensiveRationalizing
Book:The Dead Path
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“Prudence is precaution, prudence is protection.”

InspirationalWritingPhilosophyWisdomMotivationalQuotesKnowledgeSpeechProtectionCommon SenseMovieStoryRhetoricCreative WritingPrudenceAmit KalantriAmit Kalantri QuotesPublic SpeakingProverbsSocial NetworkingBloggingPrudentCharactersAmit Kalantri WriterAdageNovel WritingBook WritingEssayScriptAdvertisementBlogConsideratePrecautionMovie DialogueScript WritingCatchphrasesAlliterationsTag LinesScriptwritingCatch LinesSpeechwritingPunchlineDefensivePrecautionary
Book:Wealth of Words
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“Suddenly finding myself imprisoned in the ruins of the fortresses I created, I realize that that which I built to protect me has now become a labyrinth that is set to destroy me. And laying spent in the rubble, I finally realize that there is only one fortress and I cannot create it because there is only one God.”

GodChristianJesusChristianityFailureProtectJesus ChristDestructionProtectionDefenseBoundariesFailDestroyFortressesRubbleSelf ProtectionDefense MechanismsBoundaryDefensiveCaptiveImprisonedFortress
Author:Craig D. Lounsbrough
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“An incredulous scowl crossed his face as he saw a gathering of dockworkers, porters, and cabmen near his wife. A navvy called out to her- "Gi' me a smile, ye sweet tidbit! One little smile! What's yer name?" Cassandra tried to ignore the catcalls, while the coast guard stood by, doing nothing to shield her. "Now, now, Mr. Severin-" the old harbormaster said, following as Tom headed toward Cassandra with swift, ground-eating strides. Tom reached his wife, blocked her from view, and sent a chilling glance at the navvy. "My wife doesn't feel like smiling. Is there something you'd like to say to me?" The catcalls faded, and the navvy met his gaze, taking his measure... deciding to back down. "Only that you're the luckiest bastard alive," the navvy said cheekily. The crowd broke up with a mixture of chuckles and guffaws. "On your way now, lads," the harbormaster said, briskly dispersing the gathering. "Time to go about your business." As Tom turned to Cassandra, he was relieved to see that she didn't seem upset. "Are you all right?" he asked. She nodded immediately. "No harm done." The officer looked sheepish. "I thought they would tire of their sport if we ignored them long enough." "Ignoring doesn't work," Tom said curtly. "It's the same as permission. Next time, pick the ringleader and go for him." "He was twice my size," the officer protested. Tom shot him an exasperated glance. "The world expects a man to have a backbone. Especially when a woman is being harassed.”

Cassandra RavenelCenter Of AttentionDefensiveTom SeverinCatcalling
Book:Chasing Cassandra
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“When you are constantly reacting to having been wronged (or perhaps to what you may regard as a wrong); when you are always giving in by practically living to defend, retaliating one time after another, again and again, you then spend double that time trying to prove the whole story: because to third parties, you will frequently appear to be on the attack, and therefore potentially receiving attacks once more - henceforth an unending pattern of misunderstood retaliations.”

Wasting TimeMisunderstoodReactingMove OnRetaliationDefensiveWasting LifeReactionaryMisunderstood FightsDefending Yourself
Author:Criss Jami
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“Do you understand what it means when you imply you don't trust us to help you? To respect your wishes if you want to do something alone? When you lie to us?' 'You want to talk about lying?' I didn't even know what came out of my mouth. I wished I'd killed Ianthe myself, if only to get rid of the rage that writhed along my bones. 'How about the fact that you lie to yourself and all of us every single day?' She went still, but didn't loosen her hold on my arm. 'You don't know what you're talking about.' 'Why haven't you ever made a move for Azriel, Mor? Why did you invite Helion to your bed? You clearly found no pleasure in it- I saw the way you looked the next day. So before you accuse me of being a liar, I'd suggest you look long and hard at yourself-' 'That's enough.' 'Is it? Don't like someone pushing you about it? About your choices? Well, neither do I.' Mor dropped my arm. 'Get out.' 'Fine.”

LyingArgumentAngrySarah J MaasFeyreFeyre ArcheronA Court Of Wings And RuinMorThe MorriganDefensive
Book:A Court of Wings and Ruin
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“When are you going to talk about how you wrote a letter to Tamlin, telling him you've left for good?' The question hit me so viciously that I sniped, 'How about when you talk about how you tease and taunt Mor to hide whatever it is you feel for her?' Because I had no doubt that he was well aware of the role he played in their little tangled web. ... Cassian let out a startled, rough laugh. 'Old news.' 'I have a feeling that's what she probably says about you.' ... But the question he'd asked swarmed in my skull. You've left for good, you've left for good, you've left for good. I had- I'd meant it. But without knowing what he thought, if he'd even care that much... No, I knew he'd care. He'd probably trashed the manor in his rage. If my mere mention of him suffocating me had caused him to destroy his study, then this... I had been frightened by those fits of pure rage, cowed by them. And it had been love- I had loved him so deeply, so greatly, but...”

RageSarah J MaasFeyreFeyre ArcheronA Court Of Mist And FuryCassianTamlinTalkMorDefensive
Book:A Court of Mist and Fury
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“July 15, 1991 Nita: My mother was a paragon of our neighborhood, People always come up to us with hugs, saying "You have the most wonderful mother." l'd think. “Don't you see what's going on in this house?” To this day, if somehow even in jest raises their hand to me, I will do this (raises hands to protect face and cowers) I cringe. Then they look at me like, what's your probem? You don't get that from a great childhood.”

TraumaPtsdTraumatizedPost Traumatic Stress DisorderPosttraumatic Stress DisorderDefensiveTraumatic StressOverreactionTrauma SurvivorHypervigilanceJumpyOverreact
Book:Becoming One: A Story of Triumph Over Dissociative Identity Disorder
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“The detection of a person as safe or dangerous triggers neurobiologically determined pro-social or defensive behaviors. Even though we may not always be aware of danger on a cognitive level, on a neurophysiological level, our body has already started a sequence of neural processes that would facilitate adaptive defense behaviors such as fight, flight or freeze.”

PtsdDefensivenessDangerous PeopleDefensiveFight Or FlightNeurophysiologyPolyvagal TheoryFight Flight FreezeUnsafe PeopleFreeze ResponseFight Or Flight Responsive
Book:The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation
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“A child's (or an adult's) nervous system may detect danger or a threat to life when the child enters a new environment or meets a strange person. Cognitively, there is no reason for them to be frightened. But often, even if they understand this, their bodies betray them. Sometimes this betrayal is private; only they are aware that their hearts are beating fast and contracting with such force that they start to sway. For others, the responses are more overt. They may tremble. Their faces may flush, or perspiration may pour from their hands and forehead. Still others may become pale and dizzy and feel precipitously faint.”

FearThreatFrightenedPtsdNervous SystemTriggerDefensiveNeurophysiologyFight Flight Freeze
Book:The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation
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“A person whom fails to conquer oneself will always live in fear, and experiences life filled with conflict and emotional storms. Fearfulness prevents a person from perceiving reality and ever knowing oneself. Unable to cope with fear and uncertainty, a person resorts to denial, repression, compromise, and hides behind the mask of a false self.”

DenialSelf ControlRepresentationSelf MasteryDefensivenessDefense MechanismsDefensiveSelf Mastery QuotesFalse SelfSelf Master
Book:Dead Toad Scrolls
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“You can all relax. I do not need to see a therapist. I most certainly do not need to see some woo-woo yoga self-help life-coach guru person who manufactures incense in the middle of Palo Alto and travels around the world lecturing people about how to breathe." The attention of the room shifted to him like a spotlight. Every brow rose. The silence was so intense he could hear himself breathing. Not in the correct way, no doubt, but who needed training on how to breathe? What kind of scam was that? "I only know those things about her because I've heard Ashna mention them so many times." Actually, he knew because he'd read about India in the Daily Post last month. It was his job to read the local papers. Ashna frowned at him. She had never mentioned India around him until now and her narrowed eyes told him exactly how well she knew this. But she kept her mouth shut. Which meant Yash was in more trouble than if she'd said something. "Then you'll agree that I know what I'm talking about. It won't hurt to meet her once," Ashna said. Was that a threat in her eyes?”

JudgementalDefensiveAshna Raje
Book:Incense and Sensibility
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“To switch effectively from defense to social engagement strategies, the nervous system must do two things: (1) assess risk, and (2) if the environment looks safe, inhibit the primitive defensive reactions to fight, flight or freeze.”

DistrustMistrustNervous SystemTrust IssuesDefensivenessDangerous PeopleDefensiveInterpersonal RelationshipsWithdrawnPolyvagal TheoryFight Flight FreezeSocial EngagementFear RapeImage PeopleInterpersonal ProblemsNeutral Circuits
Book:The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation
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