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Funny Girlfriend Quotes

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Funny Girlfriend Quotes

“I won't lie. Walking into a room and seeing your girlfriend reading a baby-name book can kind of make your heart stop.”

Heart Kind Book Lying Reading Names Rooms Seeing Baby Walking Girlfriend Your Girlfriend Sydrian Funny Girlfriend

Book:The Fiery Heart: A Bloodlines Novel

Source: The Fiery Heart: A Bloodlines Novel

“Not every problem someone has with his girlfriend is necessarily due to the capitalist mode of production.”

Problem Productions Dues Girlfriend Capitalist Funny Girlfriend

Author:Herbert Marcuse

“Well, a girlfriend once told me never to fight with anybody you don't love.”

Wells Fighting Relationship Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Jack Nicholson

“My girlfriend is much better than I am at working hard then resting, and she demands that from me, too. She insists on having time when we don't do anything. We leave the housework and watch a movie.”

Hard Work Watches Demand Girlfriend My Girlfriend Housework Funny Girlfriend

Author:Cynthia Nixon

“I think the reason I don't read is because, when I'm reading, I feel like I'm missing out on something else. You know, What are my friends doing? Where's my girlfriend?”

Thinking Knows Feels Reason Reading Missing My Friends Girlfriend My Girlfriend Missing Out Funny Girlfriend

Author:Adam Sandler

“My bed isn't made, I'm tired, I haven't slept well for two weeks. I haven't been laid in a month. I don't have a girlfriend. I have a warrant for my arrest.”

Wells Made Two Week Havens Months Bed Tired Girlfriend Two Weeks I'm Tired Warrants Funny Girlfriend

Author:Layne Staley

“It's important for me to treat a girlfriend with respect. My mum would be horrified if I behaved any differently - and I have sisters, and would hate for them to be treated badly by guys.”

Ifs Important Would Be Guy Hate Treats Treated Girlfriend Mum Funny Girlfriend

Author:Louis Tomlinson

“Personally, I don't like a girlfriend to have a husband. If she'll fool her husband, I figure she'll fool me.”

Ifs Figures Fool Husband Girlfriend Shanghai Fool Me Funny Girlfriend

Author:Orson Welles

“When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'”

“We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.”

“I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.”

Thinking Fashion Style Hair Refuse Clever Eyebrows Chins Funny Girlfriend

Author:Janette Barber

“My first serious girlfriend, when I was 16, was Mormon. I went to her house for 'family home evening,' and I was like, 'Why aren't you people ignoring each other and watching television?'”

People Firsts Home House Television Serious Evening Girlfriend Watching Television Family Home Funny Girlfriend

Author:Trey Parker

“When you're a teenager, you want to meet a lot of girls - you want to get the most girls. You don't know anything about respect; you don't know anything about being faithful and loyal to your girlfriend.”

Knows Want Girl Teenager Faithful Girlfriend Loyal Being Faithful Your Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend Girl You Want

Author:Nas

“People don't get through to the essence of you right away - it's always the famous 'girl' or the famous 'girlfriend'. I'd rather be known for myself.”

People Girl Known Essence Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Vanessa Paradis

“Just because we are women doesn't mean the only roles we can play are that of the finger-shaking girlfriend.”

Mean Play Roles Fingers Girlfriend Shaking Funny Girlfriend

Author:Sarah Shahi

“We are constantly protecting the male ego, and it's a disservice to men. If a man has any sensitivity or intelligence, he wants to get the straight scoop from his girlfriend.”

Ifs Men Want Ego Dating Males Girlfriend Sensitivity Disservice Male Ego Funny Dating Funny Girlfriend

Author:Betty Dodson

“London is like a girlfriend I loved, then really fell out with.”

London Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Lapo Elkann

“I love my girlfriend to bits. I'd never do anything to hurt her.”

Bits Hurt Girlfriend My Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Charlie Simpson

“My girlfriend and I never let each other forget how much we love each other. It's all about reminding the other person how important and special she is to you.”

Persons Important Forget Special Girlfriend Love Each Other My Girlfriend Reminding Your Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Tyler Hoechlin

“The only people you can really share certain things with in secret are your girlfriends.”

People Certain Secret Share Girlfriend Your Girlfriend Funny Girlfriend

Author:Shirley Knight

“I'm not a lesbian, but my girlfriend is.”

Love Humor Funny Humour Humorous Actresses Girlfriend My Girlfriend Lesbianism Funny Girlfriend

Author:Gina Gershon

“Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.”

Women Power Management Empowering Funny Girlfriend

Author:Lily Tomlin

“When I turned 18, I skipped my party to take my girlfriend on a road trip. It turned out to be an amazing birthday.”

Party Girlfriend My Girlfriend Road Trip Funny Girlfriend

Author:Josh Hartnett