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Gender Roles Quotes

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Gender Roles Quotes

“But as for the rest of you, sisters, when anyone says to you, this, that or the other is natural, then fight. Nature does not know best; for the birds, for the bees, for the cows; for men, perhaps. But your interests and Nature’s do not coincide. Nature our Friend is an argument used, quite understandably, by men.”

FeminismGender RolesFeminist QuotesGender InequalityGender DifferencesFeminist LiteratureGender NormsFeminist Philosophy
Book:Praxis
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“All the backpedaling and backstepping that goes on with powerful women today, with Hillary Clinton saying she could have stayed home and baked cookies and blah blah blah, and then offending everybody so that she had to say that she does, in fact, *love* to make cookies, loves it almost as much as she likes to trade agricultural futures. I mean, what is that about? All this I'm really a lady, I'm really a nice girl crap- who needs it? It really is nothing more than surrender.”

Gender RolesAssertivenessBitchHillary Clinton
Book:Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women
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“She was running for all those ordinary, fragile souls whose bodies had been shamed like hers. In them, she had found herself. And so she ran for them, for those who, like her, had found comfort only in cut-out posters of clownfish. Now they had a different poster they could dream about: an athlete, an international star, her body neither fully boy nor fully girl, but simply the body of Johanna Venter, Girl Wonder.”

GenderGender RolesGender IdentityBody ShameBody Differences
Book:The Sand People: a collection of magical realism and other stories
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“I think my husband loved me as a vessel. [...] He never took the time to discover my body, he never explored it for what it could offer aside from the obvious, he never found in me, in my essence, a purpose other than to carry children, and when I admitted I couldn’t do this for him he turned away from me. He had no more use for my limbs or my skin, my muscles or tongue or fingertips. He couldn’t even see me anymore.”

PainRelationshipsMarriageIdentityWomanhoodIntrospectiveGender RolesObjectificationEmotional NeglectLoss Of Self
Book:Wild Dark Shore
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“I do believe our culture is doing a bad job raising boys. The evidence is in the shocking violence of Paducah, Jonesboro, Cheyenne, and Edinboro. It's in our overcrowded prisons and domestic violence shelters. It's in our Ritalin-controlled elementary schools and alcohol-soaked college campuses.”

ParentingParents And ChildrenGender RolesBoyhoodRaising SonsReal Boys
Book:Real Boys: Rescuing Our Sons from the Myths of Boyhood
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“[A] woman, working fulltime in the home or outside of it as well, married or single, has to put hours of labor into reproducing her own labor power, and women well know the tyranny of this task, for a pretty dress and hairdo are conditions for their getting the job, whether on the marriage market or on the wage labor market.”

FeminismGender RolesGender InequalitySocialist FeminismFeminist SocialismDomestic LaborWages For Housework
Book:Revolution at Point Zero: Housework, Reproduction, and Feminist Struggle
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“Because human beings lived then in a world in which physical strength was the most important attribute for survival; the physically stronger person was more likely to lead. And men in general are physically stronger. (There are of course many exceptions.) Today, we live in a vastly diʃerent world. The person more qualiɹed to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative. And there are no hormones for those attributes. A man is as likely as a woman to be intelligent, innovative, creative. We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.”

FeministGender RolesWage Gap
Book:We Should All Be Feminists
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“The effect of gender is produced through the stylization of the body and, hence, must be understood as the mundane way in which bodily gestures, movements, and styles of various kinds constitute the illusion of an abiding gendered self. This formulation moves the conception of gender off the ground of a substantial model of identity to one that requires a conception of gender as a constituted social temporality.”

Gender RolesSocial ContextNormative Perceptions Of GenderRather Constructed Than Natural
Book:Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity
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“Once established, the young girl's dependency is systematically supported as she proceeds through childhood. For being "nice" - nonchallenging, nonconfronting, noncomplaining - she's rewarded with good grades, the approval of her parents and teachers, and the affection of her peers. What reason is there for her to turn deviant or nonconformist? The going is good, so she conforms. Increasingly, she patterns herself after what's expected of her.”

FeminismPatriarchyGender RolesMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsCinderella Complex
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“We have only one real shot at "liberation", and that is to emancipate ourselves from within. It is the thesis of this book that personal, psychological dependency - the deep wish to be taken care of by others - is the chief force holding women down today. I call this "The Cinderella Complex" - a network of largely repressed attitudes and fears that keeps women in a kind of half-light, retreating from the full use of their minds and creativity. Like Cinderella, women today are still waiting for something external to transform their lives.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependency
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Fear (...) that has no relation to capabilities or even to reality is epidemic among women today. Fear of being independent (that could mean we'd end up alone and uncared for); fear of being dependent (that could mean we'd be swallowed by some dominating "other"); fear of being competent and good at what we do (that could mean we'd have to keep on being good at what we do); fear of being incompetent (that could mean we'd have to keep on feeling shlumpy, depressed, and second class). (...) Phobia has so thoroughly infiltrated the feminine experience it is like a secret plague. It has been built up over long years by social conditioning and is all the more insidious for being so thoroughly acculturated we do not even recognize what has happened to us. Women will not become free until they stop being afraid. We will not begin to experience real change in our lives, real emancipation, until we begin the process - almost a de-brainwashing - of working through the anxieties that prevent us from feeling competent and whole.”

FearWomenFeminismOppressionInsecurityPatriarchyGender RolesBrainwashingMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsPsychological TraumaCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependence
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“While we avoid taking credit for success, women leap at the opportunity to take responsibility for failure. Men tend to externalize the reasons for their failure, putting it off on something or someone else. Not so women, who absorb blame as if they were born to be societys doormats. (Some women like to speak of their willingness to take blame as if it were a form of altruism. It isn't. Women take the blame because they find it scary to confront those who are actually culpable of wrongdoing.)”

WomenPatriarchyGender RolesDouble StandardsMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsPsychological TraumaCinderella Complex
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“The psychological need to avoid independence - the "wish to be saved" - seemed to me an important issue, quite probably the most important issue facing women today. We were brought up to depend on a man and to feel naked and frightened without one. We were taught to believe that as women we cannot stand alone, that we are too fragile, too delicate, needful of protection. So that now, in these enlightened days, when our intellects tell us to stand on our own two feet, unresolved emotional issues drag us down.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependency
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Women (...) have been encouraged since they were children to be dependent to an unhealthy degree. Any woman who looks within knows that she was never trained to be comfortable with the idea of taking care of herself, standing up for herself, asserting herself. At best she may have played the game of independence, inwardly envying the boys (and later the men) because they seemed so naturally self-sufficient. It is not nature that bestows this self-sufficiency on men; it's training. Males are educated for independence from the day they are born. Just as systematically, women are taught that they have an out - that someday, in some way, they are going to be saved. That is the fairy tale, the life-message (...) We may venture out on our own for a while. We may go away to school, work, travel; we may even make good money, but underneath it all there is a finite quality to our feelings about independence. Only hang on long enough, the childhood story goes, and someday someone will come along to rescue you from the anxiety of authentic living. (The only savior the boy learns about is himself.)”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependency
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“(...) performance anxiety [in the worplace] is connected to other, more general fears which have to do with feeling inadequate and defenseless in the world: the fear of retaliation from someone with whom one disagrees; the fear of being critisized for doing something wrong; the fear of saying "no"; the fear of stating one's needs clearly and directly, without manipulating. These are the kinds of fears that affect women in particular, because we were brought up to believe that taking care of ourselves, asserting ourselves, is unfeminine. We wish (...) to feel attractive to men: non-threatening, sweet, "feminine". This wish crimps the joy and productiveness with which women could be leading their lives.”

FeminismPatriarchyGender RolesMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsPsychological TraumaCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependence
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Because of the way society sets them up, women never again experience the need to develop independence - until some crisis in later life explodes their complacency, showing them how sadly helpless and undeveloped they've allowed themselves to be.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional DependenceFinancial Dependence
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Women retain their dependence needs long past the developmental point at which those needs are normal and healthy. Unbeknownst to others - and worse, unbeknownst to ourselves - we carry dependency within us like some autoimmune disease. We carry it with us from kindergarten through college and graduate school, into our careers, and into the convenient "arrangement" of our marriages. (...) Much of the time - for many of us, all of the time - our unwillingness to stand on our own two feet goes unnoticed because it's expected. Women are relational creatures. They nurture and need. This, we have been told for many, many years, is nature. And although it cripples us, we have to let it go unquestioned.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependence
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Much of what is considered "good" in little girls is considered downright repulsive in little boys. Physical timidity or hypercautiousness, being quietly "well behaved", and depending on others for help and support are thought to be natural - if not outright charming - in girls. Boys, however, are actively discouraged from the dependent forms of relating, which are considered "sissyish" in male children.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional DependenceFemale Socialization
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“One strong idea being put forth these days (...) is that women should above all be given choice. (...) But this "right to choose" whether or not we provide for ourselves has contributed mightily to the female achievement gap. Because they have the social option to stay home, women can - and often do - back off from assuming responsibility for themselves. (...) There is something wrong with this. (...) We want so desperately to believe that we do not have to be responsible for our own welfare.”

WomenFeminismGender RolesMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional DependenceEconomic DependenceThe Fallacy Of Choice
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Because of a profound, deep-seated doubt in their own competence, which begins in early childhood, girls become convinced that they must have protection if they are going to survive. This belief is bred into women by misguided social expectations (...) Girls are trained very differently than boys. The training leads to their becoming adults who stay stuck in jobs beneath their capabilities. It leads them to feel intimidated by the men they marry, and to defer to them in the hope of being protected. It even leads (...) to the crippling of women's intellectual abilities. Long praised by teachers for being diligent and dutiful in school, we who rely on dutifulness to get us by in the professional world son find ourselves being treated as if we were not quite grown up. (...) Not to be taken seriously. And (...) easily exploitable. (...) The way girls are socialized continues to predetermine an agonizing conflict over the psychological independence that's necessary if women are ever to spring free and take their place in the sun.”

WomenFeminismPatriarchyGender RolesMale PrivilegeSocietal ConstructsCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependence
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“[...] For instance, a gay man who played with dolls in his childhood, dresses pink and engages in anal sex with another man triggers a gender prejudice, by proxy rather than based on a characteristic of their own, like racism and classism do: dolls and pink are traditionally associated with the feminine sphere, anal sexuality has a higher stigma mainly because a more visible power level play comes into effect (with a dominant and a submissive role) than other sex positions. Consequently, when a man crosses his "designated" gender role boundary of masculinity, strength, dominance into femininity, weakness, submission, then he is no longer valued as a human being, for the man has become [or is] a woman. Therefore, homophobia and transphobia are actually by-products of misogyny, which is is turn gynophobic whitewashing, deeply rooted in the dominant ideology of patriarchy and historical sexism.”

LgbtGender RolesEthics And Moral PhilosophySocial CriticismNon Fiction Books InspirationalPractical Ethics
Book:Philosophy Trips: A Naive's Guide
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“The workplace would allow parents to work part time, to share jobs, to take personal leaves to give birth, tend to a sick child, or care for a well one. As Delores Hayden has envisioned in Redesigning the American Dream, it would include affordable housing closer to places of work and perhaps community-based meal and laundry services.”

WorkGender RolesThe American Dream
Book:The Second Shift: Working Families and the Revolution at Home
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“There is so much more we need to learn and understand. Therefore to be open to learning, understanding, and questioning our social constructed gender box is, in my view, the absolute first step.”

Gender RolesGender StereotypesGender NormsGender Equality Quotes
Book:The Story of Boxes, the Good, the Bad and the Ugly: The Secret to Human Liberation, Peace and Happiness
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“At the birthday parties of friends I wait for the moment when someone’s mum clears away what’s left of the Angel Delight and says plaintively, ‘I wish they were all like you, Robert.’ Which is to say, ‘I wish they were all as quiet as you, Robert.’ I’m almost indignant if I don’t get that compliment at some stage. But then, I’m also uneasy, because I know that boys are not supposed to be quiet.”

MasculinityGender RolesAmab
Book:How Not to Be a Boy
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“(...) psychiatrists today recognize the contortionist's act that was required of women in an age when they were expected to stifle their own healthiest impulses. (...) "To be able to renounce your own achievements without feeling that you were sacrificing requires constant effort. To be lovely and unaggressive, a woman spends a lifetime keeping hostile or resentful impulses down. Even healthy self-assertion is often sacrificed since it may be mistaken by hostility. Therefore, [women] often repress their initiative, give up their aspirations, and unfortunately end up excessively dependent with a deep sense of insecurity and uncertainty about their abilities and their worth.”

WomenFeminismOppressionInsecurityPatriarchyGender RolesDouble StandardsMale PrivilegePsychological TraumaCinderella ComplexEmotional Dependency
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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“Why are women so fearful? The answer to that question lies at the root of The Cinderella Complex. (...) Many women achieve a certain amount of success in their careers and professions and still remain inwardly insecure. In fact (...), it's remarkable how many women these days retain a hidden core of self doubt while performing on the outside as if they were towers of confidence. (...) Lack of confidence seems to follow us from childhood (...) No matter how fiercely we try to live like adults - flexible, powerful and free - that girl-child hangs on (...). The effects of such insecurity are widespread, and they result in a disturbing social phenomenon: women in general tend to function well below the level of their native abilities. For reasons that are both cultural and psychological - a system that doesn't really expect a great deal from us, in combination with our own personal fears of standing up and facing the world - women are keeping themselves down.”

FearWomenFeminismInsecurityPatriarchyGender RolesMale PrivilegeCinderella ComplexEmotional DependencyPsycchological Trauma
Book:The Cinderella Complex: Women's Hidden Fear of Independence
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