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“When I was young I was on punishment a lot and I used to watch a lot of TV, and I asked myself a question: 'How come people like Mike? How come they like Magic? How come they like Bird? How come they don't like the big guys?' So I just throw a little bit of what they were doing. You smile, you act crazy and silly. And I think people like me because I'm different. I've always been a class clown type of guy. It comes natural.”

“What Mr. Loughner knows is that he has the full support of a major political party in this country ... he knows that ... the Democrat party is attempting to find anybody but him to blame. He knows if he plays his cards right, he's just a victim. ... This guy clearly understands he's getting all the attention and he understands he's got a political party doing everything it can, plus a local sheriff doing everything that they can to make sure he's not convicted of murder -- but something lesser.”

“Jamie Keehn, our second Australian punter. Again, you have to learn the language. You just can't speak to those guys. You have to know how to speak Australian. ... Australians have a higher voice. When you just speak regular English, it doesn't quite get across. Of course, we've had experience with our Australians, so we're pretty comfortable with adjusting our dialect so that it fits the ability to communicate.”

“Let's put it in old movie Mafia terms. There are guys that are in position to get by but they didn't wait their turn. They back-doored the top guy to get the power. For example, Sonny Corleone went up there, and he wanted to be the top guy. And the Godfather said, 'You know what dude, I'm a star.' That's what I'm doing now, and that's what I was trying to do with what's-his-name.”

“We want stuff done right. As long as it's my team, I'll voice my opinion. Yep, it's my team. You media guys might give it to him, like you've given him everything else his whole lifetime, but this is the Diesel's ship. And if we're not right, I'm going to go out there and try to get it right... Just ask Karl and Garywhy they wanted to come here. It was because of one person, not two. One.”

“The biggest thing that will define my legacy is how I've done it, and what I've done, and who I am. I'm a weird big guy. Doing rapping, doing movies. Do a lot of stuff. But always do things the right way. Went to the police academy to become a police officer. Get his master's in criminal justice, stayed out of trouble. Played for three different teams. Changed three different franchises around. This is a guy who they would have secret meetings about to change the rules. So, that's going to be my legacy: the most dominant player ever.”

“Guys have made livings off me. Nick Anderson got a new contract. Travis Knight got a new contract off me. As a matter of fact, Derek Fisher called me yesterday to thank me. If you double me, I'm kicking out to Eddie, who's the best shooter in the East. Or I'm going to give it to Dwyane, or put it on the ground and come bang on you.”

“I am aware that most people only see me as Shaq... the guy on the court. But there is another side to who I am, Shaquille O'Neal. And Shaquille O'Neal wants to explore every part of life. He wants the opportunity to pursue all of his desires. That includes being a part of the music industry as an MC. Music is and will always be a part of who I am.”

“Man, I don't wanna do what all the other guys do. I don't wanna end up in the booth after the games telling you what I think and talking smack about the guys on the floor when they are a lot better than that. I wanna be different. I don't wanna be known as Commentator Shaq. I wanna be a doctor or something good. I wanna be Dr. Shaq, Officer Shaq, Deputy Shaq.”

“It was a weird game. There was ugly shooting and a lot of turnovers and mistakes, and we were just fortunate to get the win. I should have done better, but it was just a very ugly and weird game... I knew the game was going to be an ugly game when I saw those three guys at the scorer's table. Ugly people call ugly games.”

“I remember one guy, Reg Park, a British bodybuilder, who entered Mr Universe when he was very young. But he won it and continued to win it a second and third time. So, he was my idol. I read everything about Reg Park and followed his footsteps and trained like him. I said if he could make it, I could make it. It was a blueprint, basically, for how to get there, to win the championships.”

“I definitely write about things that are universal, that everyone can identify with. You're supposed to write about things you're passionate about and I guess I am a foodie. I do love food and it's kind of like I'm an eccentric observationalist guy. To make it kind of universal, I try a lot of different things. When I first started writing this, I was like, 'No food.' Then, you know, it just always goes there.”

“I'm a spreadsheet guy. But you get to that moment of truth, and it has nothing to do with a spreadsheet. You've got to factor in what your competitors are doing, what the technology is doing, what your shareholders want, what your employees want, what your customers want, and you've got to make it happen sometimes.”