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Poop Quotes

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Poop Quotes

“Harry is heavily into camping, and every year in the late fall, he makes us all go to Assateague, which is an island on the Atlantic Ocean famous for its wild horses. I realize that the concept of wild horses probably stirs romantic notions in many of you, but this is because you have never met any wild horses in person. In person, they are like enormous hooved rats. They amble up to your camp site, and their attitude is: We're wild horses. We're going to eat your food, knock down your tent and poop on your shoes. We're protected by federal law, just like Richard Nixon.”

YearsPersonsLawFallRealizingAttitudeMetsOceanLateHumorousConceptsHorseNotionShoesEnormousIslandsCampsProtectedSiteRatsTentsCampingPoopWild HorsesAtlantic Ocean
Author:Dave Barry
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“The cardinal points are a direct reference to the astrological colures. The Cardinals surround the Pope as the cardinal points surround the sun. The sun casts its rays on the Houses as it passes, turning them crimson. The color worn by the physical Cardinals is red, to symbolize that they are illuminated by their proximity to the Pope, the representative of God on earth. The word Pope, may also be a derivative of the word in Egyptian for the evil serpent Apep, Apophis or Apopsa (See Poop Deck and Pupa, and Pepsi, Pepsid, Dr. Pepper, Sgt. Pepper, etc,).”

MayEarthEvilHouseSunColorRedDirectCastsEtcSurroundRaysRepresentativesWornDrsPopeDeckSerpentCardinalsEgyptianPeppersDerivativesProximityCrimsonPoopPepsiSgt PepperDr Pepper
Author:Michael Tsarion
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“You're looking, moment by moment and scene by scene, how you can tell the most interesting story. So, we had this great short and we knew that we had a story about a boy and his dog. Because we had that pure emotional core, we could go on crazy tangents and always come back to Victor and Sparky. When I wrote in stuff like Weird Girl and the cat poop, Dutch Day and the windmill, it felt like it was part of Tim's universe.”

MomentsStoriesGirlUniverseFeltStuffInterestingBoysCrazyDogEmotionalGoes OnScenePureCatCoreMost InterestingDutchPoopWindmillsInteresting StoriesGreat Short
Author:John August
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“If I was to really get at the burr in my saddle, it's not politics - and this is, I think, probably a horrible analogy - but I look at politicians as they are doing what inherently they need to do to retain power. Their job is to consolidate power. When you go to the zoo and you see a monkey throwing poop, you go, 'That's what monkeys do, what are you gonna do?' But what I wish the media would do more frequently is say, 'Bad monkey.'”

IfsThinkingNeedsLooksJobsPoliticsWishMediaPoliticianHorribleThrowingMonkeysAnalogiesZoosPoopSaddlesBurrs
Author:Jon Stewart
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“When you get called the n-word, as a black person you can do anything. It's like getting a gold star in Super Mario Brothers and junk. I hear the music when I hear the n-word. I get right into it; I get really into it. You can do anything. You could be in a fancy restaurant - just start throwing poop at the walls. People be like, 'What are you doing?' 'Someone called him the n-word.”

PeoplePersonsStarsBlackCan DoBrotherWallGoldFancyRestaurantsThrowingGet RealJunkPoopBlack PersonMarioSuper Mario
Author:Donald Glover
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“I want to make sure to fix these obvious things - like keeping the box CLEAN! Another thing that might affect this [cats going outside the litter box] is if you put the litter box in a laundry room where people are walking by there all the time, the cat might feel kinda too exposed. When you gotta poop, you know, it takes a little longer. You want a little more privacy.”

PeopleIfsKnowsWantFeelsLittlesMightRoomsWalkingCatCleanObviousBoxesPrivacyExposedLaundryPoopObvious Things
Author:Temple Grandin
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“When [George W.] Bush was elected, I think they thought I would have some sort of special "in" with that administration, to provide some sort of inside poop. Which is not something I'd be interested in doing, and anyway, I didn't. I actually knew more people in his dad's administration. So it was obviously winding down at Rolling Stone, and they were having financial troubles, too. They weren't getting the advertising, and the issues were getting thin. They fired Bob Love, who'd been my editor there for a long time.”

PeopleThinkingLongIssuesTroubleSpecialDadLong TimeStonesFinancialAdvertisingAdministrationEditorsBobRollingRolling StonesPoopWinding Down
Author:P. J. O'Rourke
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“All these people talk so eloquently about getting back to good old-fashioned values. Well, as an old poop I can remember back to when we had those old-fashioned values, and I say let's get back to the good old-fashioned First Amendment of the good old-fashioned Constitution of the United States - and to hell with the censors! Give me knowledge or give me death!”

PeopleGivingFirstsWellsI CanStatesRememberValuesUnitedUnited StatesHellAtheismConstitutionGive MePositive AtheismGet BackCensorshipAmendmentsOld FashionedFirst AmendmentConstitution Of The United StatesPoop
Author:Kurt Vonnegut
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“Woke up this morning to the incredible news that I was nominated for an Emmy, and a shower full of dog poop. Apparently my dog is so excited, she has explosive diarrhea. I truly could not be more thankful to the Emmy voters for including me in this brilliant company of extraordinary women. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go clean up an enormous amount of dog poop out of my shower. Yay!”

IfsCompanyMorningDogAmountNewsCleanExtraordinaryIncludingIncrediblesExcuseExcitedBrilliantEnormousVotersShowersMy DogExplosivesExcuse MePoopEmmysDiarrheaYay
Author:Martha Plimpton
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“If you haven't noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and utterly devoid of awesome. It is hard, it lasts all day, the lighting is generally fluorescent, and, apparently, drinking at your desk is frowned upon. If you ever needed to ruin someone's fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.”

IfsMeanHardLastsMovingFunPartyHavensNeededDrinkingRuinsDriversDesksWorkplaceAstronautLightingPoopBeyonce
Author:Aisha Tyler
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