“Some people take the spelling bee very seriously. These people are called "parents of children in the spelling bee." They're trying to make up for their own childhood of crushed dreams and misspelled words.” PeopleTryingChildrenDreamParentChildhoodBeesCrushedSpellingMisspelled Words Author:Craig Ferguson
“Personally, I hope he doesn't get out of the campaign. I need Rick Perry. I don't want to spend the next year trying to do jokes about Mitt Romney.” WantNeedsTryingYearsNextJokesCampaignsRomneyNext Year Author:Craig Ferguson
“I salute Rick Perry for the way he's trying to overcome this. Today he came out and said he's not one of those slick politicians, that this just shows his human side, and some third excuse he can't remember.” WayTryingHumansSaidShowsTodayRememberSidesPoliticianThirdsOvercomingExcuseSaluteSlick Author:Craig Ferguson
“Now, I know Obama was trying to take the long view, but talking about solar energy in the middle of the oil spill is like watching your house engulfed in flames and saying, 'We really should change the curtains.'” KnowsShouldTryingLongHouseEnergyViewsTalkingMiddleOilFlamesCurtainsSpillsSolar EnergyOil Spill Author:Craig Ferguson
“A New York City judge struck down a proposed law to ban sodas larger than 16 ounces. I think Mayor Bloomberg should spend his time trying to improve stuff like education. New York needs a better education system if kids didn't figure out they could get around the 16-ounce soda ban by simply purchasing two 12-ounce sodas.” IfsThinkingNeedsShouldTryingTwoKidsLawStuffCitiesFiguresNew YorkJudgingNew York CityBansMayorsEducation SystemSodaPurchasing Author:Craig Ferguson
“I think I'll be Scottish in every movie I write. They always try to talk me out of it, but Woody Allen is always a nebbish New Yorker. Why shouldn't I be a goofy Glaswegian?” ThinkingWritingTryingNew YorkersScottishWoodyGoofy Author:Craig Ferguson
“That's the thing about terrorism - it works. Especially for the terrorists - they might not get what they want but it feels damn good trying.” WantFeelsTryingMightTerrorismTerroristDamnDamn Good Book:Between the Bridge and the River: A Novel Source: Between the Bridge and the River: A Novel
“People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we accept gay teeth.” PeopleWorldTryingAcceptingAcceptanceGayDollarsTeeth Author:Craig Ferguson
“Anyone who's just driven 90 yards against huge men trying to kill them has earned the right to do Jazz hands.” MenTryingHumorHandsFunnyFootballHugeJazzDanceDrivenYardsJazz Hands Author:Craig Ferguson
“I can't wait to see the debate between Ryan and Joe Biden. Biden is said to be already trying out different strategies. So far the one that Obama likes is where Biden pretends to have food poisoning and they cancel the debate.” TryingSaidI CanDifferentWaitingStrategyDebateLikesPoisoningBidenFood Poisoning Author:Craig Ferguson
“I hope what I do has an art to it, and as an artist you have to try new things and keep yourself entertained.” TryingArtArtistNew Things Author:Craig Ferguson
“I think I'm just someone that just tries to get by. I'm kind of - if it was during the Second World War, I'd be a black marketeer, I think.” IfsThinkingWorldTryingKindWarBlackWar Of The WorldsWorld War ISecond World War Author:Craig Ferguson
“I just do my thing and try each show to be more honest about why I am and who I am. It's quite tricky and actually nerve-racking to do that. It's kind of a happy train wreck.” TryingKindShowsHonestTrainWho I AmNervesTrickyWrecksTrain Wrecks Author:Craig Ferguson
“I try and live my life in bite-size chunks.” TryingSizeBitesLiving My LifeChunks Author:Craig Ferguson
