Best Bullshit Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 3

Source: Carrion Comfort

“Lawyers will always buckle under to something, whether its bribes, violence, court orders, or the weight of their own bullshit.”

Order Violence Weight Court Lawyer Bullshit Bribe Buckles

Book:Ascending

Source: Ascending

“[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is...thinking, 'This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.'”

Thinking Audience Comedy Illusion Bullshit

Author:Bill Hicks

“When it comes to bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion... Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do.”

People Men Stories Religion Watches Sky Promise Claims Convinced Invisible All Time Champion Awe Bullshit Exaggerated Diseased False Promises

Author:George Carlin

“If you want to become enlightened, you've got to get all the bullshit out of your life. You have to clear up your mind completely.”

Ifs Want Mind Effort Clear Enlightened Bullshit

Author:Frederick Lenz

“Fishing from a boat seems like dilettante bullshit - like hunting wild boar with a can of spray paint from the safety of a pick-up truck”

Seems Sea Picks Rivers Safety Paint Fishes Boat Lakes Fishing Hunting Bullshit Truck Spray Dilettantes Boars Spray Paint

Author:Hunter S. Thompson

“Mysticism cuts through bullshit, and it takes you right there to the experience. Everything in your life is eventually set up as a pragmatic energy flow into the light.”

Light Life Is Energy Cutting Flow Mysticism Bullshit Pragmatic Energy Flow

Author:Frederick Lenz

“I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.”

Ifs Wells Might Atheism Angel Positive Atheism Bullshit Zombie Packages

Author:George Carlin

“I think you gotta always do things that keep you excited in an [rap music] industry that's so bullshit. When you know that you have so much energy and so much to give, it would be a shame if the facilitators of that aren't enthusiastic about you doing it, because you've been doing it for so long. So you just gotta figure out ways in this insane business to keep it fresh.”

Ifs Thinking Knows Way Giving Long Would Be Energy Figures Industry Shame Excited Rap Insane Bullshit Enthusiastic Music Industry Rap Music

Author:Nas

“What I love about the way they both [Paul Thomas Anderson and Joaquin Phoenix] work is that all of the monkey business is on film. There's no monkey business outside of the monkey business of making the movie. There's no ego bullshit, there's no wasted energy. It's all directed at the story and that's rare.”

Way Stories Film Energy Ego Bullshit Monkeys Phoenix

Author:Katherine Waterston

“A real good artist is basically a grown-up kid, who never kills the kid. What we call being an adult is basically about killing the kid. People think you have to forget about the kid to become an adult and deal with grown-up problems. But, that's bullshit. We are still kids. It's the same, you just grow up. You're a kid with more experience.”

People Thinking Stills Real Problem Kids Artist Grows Forget Deals Growing Up Adults Killing Bullshit Good Art Good Artist

Author:Quentin Dupieux

“So many people are killing their childhood. It's like, "Okay, today I've decided I'm gonna be a grown-up, and I'm not a kid anymore." But, that's bullshit. You're still a kid. It makes no sense to kill the kid.”

People Stills Kids Today Childhood Decided Okay Killing Bullshit

Author:Quentin Dupieux

“If I lend my support to a specific cause, it has to be something that I look over and that I have a complete understanding of and it's not just some extracurricular bullshit.”

Ifs Looks Causes Understanding Support Bullshit

Author:Immortal Technique

“I had my bad times. But the good news is that every time this has happened I've taken full responsibility for it. I don't try to duck it, I don't try to dodge it, I don't try to bullshit about it. Truth crushed to the ground will rise again. And that's what my life has been about.”

Trying Has Beens Responsibility Taken Happened News Ducks Bullshit Good News Crushed Bad Times Dodge

Author:Marion Barry

“I love the bullshit morning shows. They're so stupid but I love them.”

Shows Morning Stupid Bullshit

Author:Ben Dreyfuss

“After fifty most of the bullshit is gone.”

Gone Fifty Bullshit

Author:Isabel Allende

“There is no blacklist. In the first place, in the entertainment business, money talks, bullshit walks. So Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins won't be blacklisted because they are bankable stars. In the second place, if you are a woman, the only things you're going to be blacklisted for in Hollywood are body fat and aging.”

Ifs Firsts Body Stars Walks Hollywood Aging Entertainment Fats Bullshit Second Place Money Talks Entertainment Business Body Fat

Author:Janeane Garofalo

“If you cannot come to the party, do not cancel at the last minute or give a message to a child to inform the host. And don't bother explaining why you can't attend because anything after 'because' is bullshit.”

Ifs Giving Children Lasts Party Minutes Messages Bother Host Bullshit Explaining Last Minute

Author:Amy Sedaris

“..you just get stoned, get the ideas in your head and then do 'em. And don't bullshit. I mean that's the thing about doin' that guerrilla theatre. You be prepared to die to prove your point.”

Mean Ideas Dies Prove Prepared Theatre Activism Ems Bullshit Be Prepared Guerrillas

Author:Abbie Hoffman

“I was just learning to be by myself. He seemed to really see me, see through the bullshit...He was so handsome, and he could dance. I thought, 'He won't be interested in me; I'm not a contender. He was so cool, so funny - I was such a fan of his and had always fancied his speed and his intelligence. I thought, 'I'm not beautiful enough or his type.'”

Enough Beautiful Fans Type Speed Bullshit Handsome

Author:Olivia Wilde

“I'm not superstitious in my normal daily life but I get that way about writing, even though I know it's all bullshit. But I began that way and so, that's the way it is. My ritual is I never use a typewriter or computer. I just write it all by hand. It's a ceremony. I go to a stationary store and buy a notebook and then fill it up.”

Knows Way Writing Use Hands Normal Computer Stores Daily Life Ritual Bullshit Ceremony Notebook Typewriters Superstitious Stationary

Author:Quentin Tarantino

“They're so boring. They're so pathetic, all those journalists. Most of them are. Most of those kind that write gossip stuff, and most of it's gossip. Things are just invented about your personal life and you just have to take that. It's bullshit. People believe it, though. They just believe everything they read.”

People Writing Believe Kind Stuff Boring Journalist Gossip Bullshit Personal Life Pathetic Just Believe So Boring

Author:Mick Jagger

“Why do we hide all the bullshit? Life is life. Why hide it?”

Life Is Bullshit

Author:Jim Breuer

“Why is Dave Chappelle going to Africa? Why does Mariah Carey make a hundred-million dollar deal and take her clothes off on TRL? A weak person can not get here and talk to you. Ain't no weak people talking to you. So what is happening in Hollywood? Nobody knows! The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It's dismissive. I don't understand this person, so they're crazy. That's bullshit. These people are not crazy, they're strong people. Maybe the environment is a little sick.”

“I would say that each of us has only one thing to gain from the feminist movement: Our whole humanity. Because gender has wrongly told us that some things are masculine and some things are feminine... which is bullshit.”

Whole Humanity One Thing Movement Gains Feminist Gender Feminine Bullshit Masculine Feminist Movement

Author:Gloria Steinem

“If you can't share what's important to you with the people around you, then you have no relationships. It's all just proximity, and turkey, and sports, and weather, and bullshit.”

People Ifs Important Sports Share Weather Bullshit Turkeys What's Important Proximity

Author:Stefan Molyneux

“I'm definitely good. I'm not bad; I'm extremely honest, and I allow no bullshit to pass by my radar. And that will always get lots of people thinking you're a jerk. But there are people who appreciate total honesty and questioning of the conformities in our society, and I'm heroic to those people. And I should be. It's an indictment of the rest of society who doesn't get that.”

People Thinking Should Honest Honesty Appreciate Our Society Conformity Heroic Questioning Bullshit Jerk Radar Indictment

Author:Bill Maher

“One man's accuracy is another man's bullshit.”

Men One Man Bullshit Another Man Accuracy

Author:Alex Winter

“I have less time, less tolerance for bullshit, more interest in good taste, more confidence in my own judgement. The culture with which I surround myself is a reflection of my personality and the circumstances of my life, which is in part how it should be.”

Should Culture Interest My Own Personality Circumstances Taste Reflection Tolerance Judgement Surround Bullshit Good Taste

Book:Songbook

Source: Songbook

“If you love something, set it free. If it was meant to be, it will come back to you. But this, of course, was bullshit. If you loved something and let it go...it would (hello!) find something else to love.”

Ifs Courses Meant To Be Bullshit Hello Let It Go Were Meant To Be

Author:Elin Hilderbrand

“I was never conscious of my screenplays having any acts. It's all bullshit.”

Conscious Bullshit Screenplays

Author:John Milius

“I couldn't imagine being a girl. The bullshit routine they had to go through just to get out the door consumed half of their lives.”

Girl Half Imagine Doors Routine Bullshit Consumed Being A Girl

Book:Walking Disaster: A Novel

Source: Walking Disaster: A Novel

“People say it takes 10 years to change your life. It's bullshit. It takes a moment, a second. But it may take you 10 years to get to the point of finally saying, "Enough."”

People Years May Enough Moments Bullshit Changing Your Life

Author:Tony Robbins

“We have to believe in ourselves more. It's all the same thing: We need to release the guilt. We need to forgive. We need to drop all the bullshit we were taught.”

Needs Believe Taught Forgiving Guilt Release Bullshit

Author:Louise Hay

“You need to quickly recognize when and why you're being spooned bullshit. That happens very often, but it happens for a reason.”

Needs Reason Happens Bullshit Happens For A Reason

Author:David Weigel

“Actors in general are pretty good bullshit artists; we're good at just chewing the fat, interacting with people. So we're good ambassadors for movies.”

People Artist Actors Fats Bullshit Ambassadors Interacting Chewing

Author:John C. Reilly

“When I have just sat down and tried to write the lyrics of a song, usually about half of it sounds like bullshit. I just have to go away from something and come back to it again later. I do a lot of editing and switching around and putting little pieces together to get the right mood and personality, and it takes me forever to get a song finished.”

Writing Littles Together Song Sound Half Forever Pieces Personality Down And Finished Mood Sat Going Away Take Me Bullshit Editing Switching

Author:Matt Berninger

“...I've stopped wanting to do any work at all. All work is bullshit. Everyone knows that. No matter how many telephones and extensions, no matter how many secretaries, no matter how many names in the rolodex. It's all bullshit.”

Knows Matter Names Work Secretary Bullshit Extensions Telephones

Book:Keeper of accounts

Source: Keeper of accounts

“Kids are so smart these days. They sense when there's a phony bologna out there. Especially in music, when they see something that's being marketed to them, they'll call it out. They'll be like, "This chick is bullshit."”

Kids Smart These Days Bullshit Chicks Phony Bologna

Author:Katy Perry

“I've noticed that the more flooding there is, the more bullshit gets talked. I mean it was very noticeable in the Asian tsumai. It happened around Christmas-New Year. The Muslims of Sri Lanka said 'We knew this would happen because the Christians were using alcohol for their Christmas celebrations.' The Buddhists said 'We knew this would happen because of the horrible Muslim slaughter practices.' It's amazing to see how apocalypse or catastrophe makes people behave primitively.”

People Years Mean Said Happens Christian Practice Happened Alcohol Horrible Buddhist Behave Celebration New Year Bullshit Catastrophe Apocalypse Asian Slaughter Flooding Sri Lanka

Author:Christopher Hitchens

“Some people say you can get hepatitis if you do coke with ones because they've been handled so much. But I tested that theory out for about a year, and I decided it's bullshit.”

People Ifs Years Theory Decided Bullshit Tested Coke Hepatitis

Author:The Rev

“The principal thing is the question of how our culture views age: that old is ugly Just think of Rodin, how he dealt with people of all ages. I have the feeling that I'm alive, I have a body I can make it extremely interesting. That keeps me alive and vital. It's a kind of process of energizing myself by my belief that the classical tradition of art that we've inherited from the Greeks is a load of bullshit.”

People Thinking Kind Art I Can Feelings Body Age Culture Belief Process Interesting Views Alive Tradition Ugly Greek Load Principal Bullshit I'm Alive Energizing Rodin

Author:John Coplans

“I think that, every time you saw the word EBITDA, you should substitute the word "bullshit" earnings.”

Thinking Should Saws Investing Substitutes Bullshit Earning

Author:Charlie Munger

“It is almost impossible for anyone outside this damn beltway to really understand how the Congress works. If you aren't here, walking the halls of Congress, sitting at bars and attending parties where you get to knock back some brews with Hill staffers, you don't have a handle on the almost numbing amount of bullshit that goes on.”

Ifs Party Impossible Goes On Amount Internet Walking Sitting Congress Bars Handle Hills Damn Halls Free Speech Bullshit Attending Numbing

Author:Brock N. Meeks

“Men, this stuff that some sources sling around about America wanting out of this war, not wanting to fight, is a crock of bullshit. Americans love to fight, traditionally.”

Men War America Fighting Stuff Source Bullshit

Author:George S. Patton

“I would like to start by calling bullshit.”

Calling Bullshit

Author:Rocco Landesman

“The best defence against bullshit is vigilance. So if you smell something, say something.”

Ifs Smell Bullshit Defence Vigilance

Author:Jon Stewart

“I'm not a moron, but science fiction to me requires a suspension of disbelief and honest curiosity or fascination in that kind of bullshit. I've just never been able to make that jump, really. I like things to be more organic.”

Kind Able Fiction Honest Science Fiction Curiosity Bullshit Fascination Disbelief Moron Suspension Suspension Of Disbelief

Author:Marc Maron

“If you're ever making a television show, don't cast smart actors because they are just a pain in the ass. The moment you start to bullshit them you've lost them, so you have to either know what you're talking about or when you don't talk to them.”

Ifs Knows Moments Shows Pain Actors Lost Talking Television Smart Casts Ass Bullshit Television Shows

Author:Ray McKinnon

“Docs are more exhausting because of the physical labor that's required. Feature filmmaking is more exhausting because of politics and the bullshit. You get to the point of rolling film and until you lock picture it's one political game after another. They're both struggles for survival. They are two different worlds.”

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