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Family Quotes

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Family Quotes

“Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: each generation repeats the mistakes the previous one made.”

Children Made Hard Humor Funny Business Mistake Family Generations Repeats Hardship Raising Children Cumulative Risky Business

Book:Fatherhood

Source: Fatherhood

“It is not possible for one to teach others who cannot teach his own family.”

Love Inspirational Wisdom Funny Family Teach Confucianism

Author:Confucius

“I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.”

Funny Found Family Tree Humorous My Family Witty Forests Sap Genealogy

Author:Rodney Dangerfield

“My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.”

Humor Wanted Funny Wish Family Dying Chairs Electric Uncles Lap Start The Day Funny Family Electric Chair

Book:It's Not Easy Bein' Me: A Lifetime of No Respect but Plenty of Sex and Drugs

Source: It's Not Easy Bein' Me: A Lifetime of No Respect but Plenty of Sex and Drugs

“A day wasted on others is not wasted on one's self.”

Love Self Funny Happiness Time Family Time Management Wasting Time Wasted Time Managing Time Tale Of Two Cities Efforts Wasted Not Wasting Time

Author:Charles Dickens

“The ideal age for a boy to own a dog is between forty-five and fifty.”

Age Funny Family Boys Five Dog Ideals Fifty Forty

Book:Chips Off the Old Benchley

Source: Chips Off the Old Benchley

“I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.”

“Too soon did she find herself at the drawing room door. And after pausing a moment for what she knew would not come, for a courage which the outside of no door had ever supplied to her, she turned the lock in desperation and the lights of the drawing room and all the collected family were before her.”

Funny Family Courage Irony Sarcasm Dread Shyness Door Fanny

Book:Mansfield Park

Source: Mansfield Park

“Oh, hell no!” Ferd clapped to get our attention. “You’ve been drinking…without me!”

Humor Funny Family Friends

Book:A Sinful Sacrifice

Source: A Sinful Sacrifice

“A little of an over-exaggeration, don’t you think?” He was clearly as unnerved by her outburst as me. “But I missed so much. Just let me be dramatic for once.” “You’re dramatic ninety-nine per cent of the time,” Sin told her when he returned. “And you took the consequences for your bullshit. Behave yourself, woman!”

Funny Family Friends

Book:A Sinful Sacrifice

Source: A Sinful Sacrifice

“The fact that you have just buried your parent or parents and/or sibling or siblings does not make you less likely to die today.”