Quotessence
Home / Topics / Humorous Quotes

Humorous Quotes

Browse 3047 quotes about Humorous.

Related topics

FunnyWittyHumorIfsMenPeopleInspirationalKnowsThinkingSarcasticLifeStupidChildrenWayWantInsaneProfoundShouldFirstsPowerfulAmericaSaidGivingWorldTwoSarcasmYearsSexLaughterWellsGodBookKidsAgeWritingLongMadeComedyFoodMeanTryingBabyComedianLittlesLoveMayLooksMindNamesPoliticalMarriageRepublicanAirlineDemocratDrinkingFactsHumansParentingPersonsDoeNeedsThreeBeerEnglandHandsHilariousMusicNew YorkAir TravelEnoughI CanIdeasPartyPoliticsStillsFunny LifeKindBelieveDoctorsDrinkHas BeensProblemWarFunInspirationRussiaDiesJapanNextPhonesSchoolStatesYoungCountryFeelsHelpingLastsLawyerMightMoneymore

Humorous Quotes

“You should not use your fireplace, because scientists now believe that, contrary to popular opinion, fireplaces actually remove heat from houses. Really, that's what scientists believe. In fact many scientists actually use their fireplaces to cool their houses in the summer. If you visit a scientist's house on a sultry August day, you'll find a cheerful fire roaring on the hearth and the scientist sitting nearby, remarking on how cool he is and drinking heavily.”

IfsShouldBelieveHeartFactsUseHouseOpinionFireSummerHumorousSittingScientistDrinkingContraryHeatRemoveCheerfulAugustRoaringPopular OpinionFireplaces
Book:All the Dave Barry you could ever want: four classic books in one from America's foremost humorist
Create image

“"I go so far as to say, miss, morehover," proceeded Mr. Cruncher, with a most alarming tendency to hold forth as from a pulpit-"and let my words be took down and took to Mrs. Cruncher through yourself-that wot my opinions respectin' flopping has undergone a change, and that wot I only hope with all my heart as Mrs. Cruncher may be a flopping at the present time."”

HeartMayFunnyOpinionMissingMy HeartHumorousDown AndTendenciesPulpitPresent TimeWotFlopping
Book:A Tale of Two Cities and Great Expectations (Oprah's Book Club): Two Novels
Create image

“It is considered in England and the United States that the Government of South Africa is altogether too harsh with its native peoples. It is sadly humorous to notice that the native in South Africa, however, holds an exactly reverse opinion and the fault he finds with the South African Government is that it is far too lenient in its administration of laws throughout the native populace.”

StatesGovernmentLawUnitedOpinionUnited StatesHumorousEnglandFaultsSouthAdministrationNativeSouth AfricaReverseHarshLenient
Author:L. Ron Hubbard
Create image

“Close friends and relatives, while not meaning to do so, often handicap on through 'opinions' and sometimes though ridicule, which is meant to be humorous. Thousands of men and women carry inferiority complexes with them all through life, because some well-meaning, but ignorant person destroyed their confidence through opinions or ridicule”

ThinkingMenWellsPersonsSometimesOpinionPositive ThinkingHumorousMen And WomenComplexesIgnorantDestroyedMeant To BeRidiculeInferiorityClose FriendsHandicapsInferiority ComplexIgnorant Person
Author:Napoleon Hill
Create image

“A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.”

MindI CanHumorFunnyReligionChangeBusinessOpinionSubjectsHumorousMinistersGreat MenPrime MinisterFunny InspirationalMaking ChangesFanaticsFanaticismCan't ChangeMiscellaneousReligious FanaticsBrain PowerYou Can't Change PeoplePolitics FunnyCan't Change People
Book:The Irrepressible Churchill: Stories, Sayings and Impressions of Sir Winston Churchill
Create image