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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.”

Brain Pieces Subjects Produce Paper Humorous Capacity Productions Defined Division Frontiers

Book:Plymouth Rock and the Pilgrims and other salutary platform opinions

Source: Plymouth Rock and the Pilgrims and other salutary platform opinions

“Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.”

Long Ends Funny Music Pieces Humorous Witty Piano Composer Funny Music Famous Musician Classic Music Composing Music Piano Music

Author:Igor Stravinsky

“She dotes on poetry, sir. She adores it; I may say that her whole soul and mind are wound up, and entwined with it. She has produced some delightful pieces, herself, sir. You may have met with her 'Ode to an Expiring Frog,' sir.”

Mind May Soul Whole Funny Pieces Mets Humorous Wounds Adore Delightful Frogs Entwined Odes

Book:The posthumous papers of the Pickwick Club

Source: The posthumous papers of the Pickwick Club

“I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.”

Ifs Way Funny Nature White Pieces Feet Humorous Scream Sharks Seaweed

Author:Axl Rose

“Here is the piece. If you can't say fornicate can you say copulate or if not that can you say co-habit? If not that would have to say consummate I suppose. Use your own good taste and judgment.”

Ifs Use Funny Pieces Habit Taste Judgment Humorous Good Taste Swearing Profanity Obscenity Taste And Judgment

Book:Ernest Hemingway Selected Letters 1917-1961

Source: Ernest Hemingway Selected Letters 1917-1961

“I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.”

Said Wanted Remember Father Comedy Pieces Dad Humorous Fingers Happy Proof Fathers Day Kidnapped Funny Fathers Day Funny Father Funny Happy Fathers Day

Author:Rodney Dangerfield

“It looked something like a pen wiper and something like a piece of hearth-rug. A second and keener inspection revealed it as a Pekinese puppy.”

Pieces Humorous Pens Puppy Inspection

Author:P. G. Wodehouse

“I was trampled to death by a man who believed his luggage would be the first piece off. If he were an experienced traveler, he would know that the first piece of luggage belongs to no one. It's just a dummy suitcase to give everyone hope.”

Ifs Knows Men Giving Firsts Humor Would Be Funny Pieces Food Humorous Traveler Airports Airline Suitcases Luggage Dummy Air Travel

Author:Erma Bombeck