Best President Bush Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 2

“Is it me or is President Bush's life starting to sound like a country song. He's from Texas, his dog just died, and it looks like he might lose his job. Next thing, his truck is going to break down.”

Looks Country Might Jobs Song Next Sound President Loses Break Dog Died Starting Texas Breaking Down Truck President Bush

Author:Jay Leno

“A Newsweek poll said if the election were held today, John Kerry would beat Bush 49 percent to 46 percent. And today, President Bush called Newsweek magazine a threat to world peace.”

Ifs World Said Today President Beats Percent Election Threat Magazines Polls President Bush John Kerry

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush was in Los Angeles yesterday where he announced his new campaign theme - “Safer, Stronger, and Tested.” Isn't that a condom ad?”

President Stronger Campaigns Yesterday Theme Los Angeles Ads Tested President Bush Condom

Author:Jay Leno

“You may have heard this, that NASA discovered water on Mars When he heard about the water on Mars, President Bush said, 'Is it regular or unleaded?'”

May Said President Water Heard Mars President Bush Nasa

Author:Craig Kilborn

“America's humanitarian concern for foreign victims of natural disasters or civil strife is being abused by President Bush when he extends legal status to foreigners in the US when there is no reason that they could not go home safely.”

Reason Home America President Natural Concern Victim Humanitarian Disaster No Reason Strife President Bush Foreigners Natural Disaster

Author:Dan J. Stein

“I was invited by President Bush to come to the United States on the occasion of the 50th anniversary of the mutual defense treaty.”

States President United United States Defense Occasions Mutual Invited President Bush Treaties 50th Anniversary

Author:Gloria Macapagal Arroyo

“Sooner or later something had to give. But President Bush, faced with the unprecedented affront of 9-11, could not wait to take action. So he had to do what we were capable of doing, and he did it brilliantly.”

Giving Action Waiting President Capable Sooner Or Later President Bush Unprecedented Affront

Author:Alexander Haig

“I didnt know that President Bush would endorse a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage.”

Knows Sex President Amendments President Bush Constitutional Amendments

Book:Now It's My Turn: A Daughter's Chronicle of Political Life

Source: Now It's My Turn: A Daughter's Chronicle of Political Life

“Different regions may require different strategies, as President Bush has noted, but not different basic principles. It's either collective security or selective security.”

May Different President Principles Security Strategy Collectives Regions President Bush Selective Basic Principles Collective Security

Author:William Safire

“From the Medicare prescription drug plan to the creation of the Department of Homeland Security and the passage of No Child Left Behind, President Bush presided over a major expansion of the reach of government.”

“President Bush said yesterday that it was appropriate for the White House to invoke Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers's religion in making the case for her to skeptical conservatives, triggering a debate over what role, if any, her evangelical faith should play in the confirmation battle.”

Ifs Should Said Play House President White Roles Cases Battle Court Debate Yesterday Supreme Appropriate White House Supreme Court Skeptical President Bush Evangelical Confirmation Invoke

Author:Peter Baker

“Senator Kerry does not support our troops. If he had won the election, there wouldn't be any troops left in Iraq. President Bush, on the other hand, has given our troops an opportunity to fight without end. That's creating jobs. In fact, the president's policies helped create 104 more job openings last month. Now who's stupid, Senator?”

“President Bush demanded that Kerry apologize. Can you imagine that -- Bush demanding an apology for someone stumbling over his words? ... Kerry should have tried the Bush strategy: say so many stupid things, no one cares anymore.”

Should Care President Imagine Stupid Should Have Strategy Apology Imagine That Apologizing President Bush Stumbling Stupid Things No One Cares

Author:Jay Leno

“John Kerry now getting slammed by the Republicans because of a botched joke he did about President Bush and Iraq in a recent speech. Kerry was stunned about this. He said, 'What? People are listening to my speeches?'”

People Said President Listening Republican Speech Jokes Iraq President Bush John Kerry Stunned

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush said John Kerry is on both sides of every issue. And Kerry replied, 'No, I'm not ... but there is some truth to that.'”

Said Sides President Issues Both Sides President Bush John Kerry

Author:Craig Kilborn

“President Bush listed his income as $822,000. You know what John Kerry calls someone who earns $822,000? Not even worth dating.”

Knows President Dating Income President Bush John Kerry

Author:Jay Leno

“John Kerry accused President Bush of catering to the rich. You know, as opposed to John Kerry who just marries them.”

Knows President Rich Accused President Bush John Kerry Catering

Author:Jay Leno

“John Kerry says that foreign leaders want him to be president, but that he can't name the foreign leaders. That's all right, President Bush can't name them either.”

Want Names President Leader President Bush Want Him John Kerry

Author:David Letterman

“John Kerry says that he wants to debate President Bush once a month until the election. This could be a risky move for Senator Kerry. If Bush doesn't show up for the debates, John Kerry may end up debating an empty chair. And that could be pretty much a toss up as to which one has the better personality.”

Ifs Want May Ends Shows Moving President Months Personality Empty Election Debate Chairs Senators President Bush Better Person Toss John Kerry

Author:Jay Leno

“Earlier today, President Bush said Kerry will be a tough and hard-charging opponent. That explains why Bush's nickname for Kerry is math.”

Said Hard Today President Tough Math Opponents President Bush Nicknames Charging

Author:Conan O'Brien

“In an interview with Rolling Stone, Senator John Kerry, who is running for president, said that when he voted for the war in Iraq, he didn't expect President Bush to 'f--- it up as badly as he did.' Here's some breaking news, tomorrow former Vice President Al Gore expected to endorse Howard Dean as the Democratic nominee for president of the United States - and you thought John Kerry was using four letter words before! Actually, to John Kerry, Dean is a four letter word.”

“President Bush broke the law and lied to the American people when he unilaterally authorized secret wiretaps of U.S. citizens. But rather than focus on this constitutional crisis, Attorney General Gonzales is cracking down on critics of his friend and boss. Our nation is strengthened, not weakened, by those whistle-blowers who are courageous enough to speak out on violations of the law.”

People Enough Law Speak Nations President Secret Focus Citizens Crisis Critics Broke Courageous Boss Lied Violation President Bush Attorney Speaks Out

Author:Anthony Romero

“President Bush was widely ridiculed for consulting the Reverend Billy Graham before the Gulf war.”

War Christian President Religious President Bush Consulting Gulf War Reverends

Book:The De-valuing of America: The Fight for Our Culture and Our Children

Source: The De-valuing of America: The Fight for Our Culture and Our Children

“When, President Bush asks me to go with his father to the Tsunami impacted areas and help raise money, I was thrilled to do that, because I think we have to always keep looking for common ground.”

Thinking Helping Asks Father President Common Areas Raises Ask Me President Bush Common Ground Tsunami

Author:William J. Clinton

“Did you folks see President Bush's State of the Union Address? How about that surprise announcement? Howard Dean has been captured and he's in the hands of interrogators.”

Has Beens States Hands President Unions Surprise Folks Addresses President Bush Captured Dean Announcements

Author:David Letterman

“People made a big deal out of the fact this is the first time a sitting president has done a late-night show. We tried to have other presidents on, but President Bush went to bed every night at 9:00. And President Clinton always seemed to have other late-night plans.”

People Firsts Made Done Facts Shows Bigs Night President Deals Plans Bed Late Sitting First Time Clinton Every Night Big Deal President Bush Late Night President Clinton

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush announced that the war in Iraq has been won. It's all over, it's been won. I believe this would be Bush's first uncontested victory.”

Firsts Believe Has Beens War Would Be I Believe President Victory Iraq Over It President Bush

Author:David Letterman

“American forces in Iraq found $650 million in American cash sealed in a hidden cottage. See, this is why President Bush wants to invade Iraq, the whole place is oil and cash. It's like Republican Disneyland.”

Want Whole Found Force President Millions Republican Iraq Oil Cash President Bush Disneyland Cottages

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush admitted that the United States went to war in Iraq based on bad intelligence. But he says knowing what we know now he would still do it again. So at least we're learning from our mistakes.”

Knows Stills War States President United Mistake United States Knowing Iraq President Bush Learning From Our Mistakes

Author:Jay Leno

“In his speech President Bush said we need to rebuild Iraq, provide the people with jobs, and give them hope. If it works there maybe we'll try it in New Orleans.”

People Ifs Needs Giving Trying Said Jobs President Speech Iraq New Orleans President Bush

Author:Jay Leno

“According to CNN, Donald Rumsfeld said the war in Iraq did not go according to plan. And President Bush said, 'What? We had a plan?'”

Said War President Plans Iraq President Bush Cnn According To Plan

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush got an early Christmas gift. This week, President Bush was chosen as 'Person of the Year' by Time magazine. Not only that, Martha Stewart was chosen as person of the year by Doing Time magazine.”

Years Persons President Week Chosen Magazines President Bush Christmas Gift Time Magazine

Author:Conan O'Brien

“As you know President Bush has been traveling around the country trying to sell his new Social Security plan. He wants to take our retirement money and invest it in the stock market. He says nothing can go wrong. I'll mention that to Martha Stewart the next time I see her.”

Knows Want Trying Has Beens Country Next Social President Plans Security Sells Retirement Next Time Social Security President Bush

Author:Jay Leno

“The corporate scandals are getting bigger and bigger. In a speech on Wall Street, President Bush spoke out on corporate responsibility, and he warned executives not to cook the books. Afterwards, Martha Stewart said the correct term was to saute the books.”

Said Book President Term Responsibility Streets Wall Speech Bigger Cooks Corporate Spokes Executives Scandal President Bush Corporate Responsibility

Author:Conan O'Brien

“But down in Florida in the early voting, there were computer glitches, confusing ballots, long lines and chaos. And when President Bush heard about this, he said, 'Mission accomplished!'”

Long Said President Lines Heard Computer Chaos Missions Accomplished Voting Florida Confusing President Bush Ballots Long Lines Glitches Mission Accomplished

Author:David Letterman

“Republicans are now saying that Dan Rather should lose his job because he misled the country with bogus information. Which is odd because the Democrats are saying the exact same thing about President Bush.”

Should Country Jobs President Loses Information Republican Democrat Odd President Bush Misled

Author:Jay Leno

“Is it me or is Bush going everywhere Kerry goes? So far in the past week, President Bush has followed John Kerry to Davenport, Iowa; New Mexico; Las Vegas; Los Angeles; and he follows him to Portland, Oregon. The only place he never followed John Kerry was Vietnam.”

Past President Week Los Angeles Vietnam Mexico President Bush Vegas Las Vegas John Kerry Iowa Oregon Portland New Mexico Portland Oregon

Author:Jay Leno

“As the Democrats get revved up at their convention in Boston, President Bush is fighting back the only way he knows how: by going on vacation! Ah, it's nice to take a rest, replenish your supply of smirks. The vacation was expected, because Bush traditionally takes a month off every summer to relax and avoid reading National Security Warnings.”

“Former President Bush, to celebrate his 80th birthday, jumped out of an airplane. And if you've seen the polls, you know he's not the only Bush in freefall.”

Ifs Knows President Celebrate Former Airplane Polls President Bush

Author:David Letterman

“The L.A. Times reports that al Qaeda terrorists have been traced to Iran, and President Bush is talking tough. In fact he said he will attack the minute he has evidence his approval rating is under 45 percent.”

Has Beens Said Facts President Talking Minutes Percent Evidence Tough Terrorist Reports Iran Als Approval President Bush Rating Al Qaeda Approval Rating

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush fell off his mountain bike down on his ranch in Texas. A couple weeks ago, John Kerry fell off his bicycle. See, doesn't this make you miss President Clinton? That guy, he could ride anything without falling off.”

Guy Fall President Week Missing Couple Mountain Clinton Texas Bike President Bush Bicycle That Guy John Kerry President Clinton Falling Off

Author:Jay Leno

“President Bush announced he has a five-point strategy for getting out of Iraq. Points six through 10 will be handled by the Kerry administration.”

President Five Six Strategy Iraq Administration President Bush

Author:David Letterman

“President Bush fell off his bicycle this weekend and you know what was really sad? It's a stationary bike.”

Knows President Weekend Bike President Bush Bicycle Really Sad Stationary

Author:Jay Leno

“Newly released transcripts reveal that President Nixon was drunk during the Arab-Israeli crisis of 1973. After hearing this, President Bush said, 'Hey, so was I!'”

Said President Crisis Hearing Drunk Hey Israeli President Bush President Nixon

Author:Conan O'Brien

“The prison scandal is really hurting President Bush's poll numbers. In fact, I hear he's already working on his concession smirk.”

Facts President Hurt Numbers Prison Scandal Polls President Bush Concessions Smirk

Author:Craig Kilborn

“President Bush delivered a commencement speech at a university in Wisconsin. A very inspirational speech. Apparently Bush told the students, 'You can do anything in life if your parents work hard enough.'”

Ifs Hard Enough Parent President Can Do Students Hard Work Speech University President Bush Wisconsin Commencement Anything In Life Commencement Speech Very Inspirational Inspirational Speech

Author:Conan O'Brien

“President Bush's campaign is now attacking John Kerry for throwing away some of his medals to protest the Vietnam War. Bush did not have any medals to throw away, but in his defense he did have all his services records thrown out.”

War President Records Defense Campaigns Thrown Protest Throwing Vietnam Medal Attacking President Bush Vietnam War John Kerry Throwing Away

Author:Jay Leno

“With Iraq plunging into chaos and gas prices at record highs President Bush took time out this weekend for a ride on his bicycle, but unfortunately he fell off and sustained cuts to his face and hands. Apparently Bush was distracted by the enormous responsibilities of the presidency. I'm just kidding. He hit some gravel or something.”

Hands Faces President Responsibility Records Cutting Chaos Iraq Enormous Gas Weekend Presidency Distracted President Bush Bicycle Gravel Gas Prices Just Kids

Author:Craig Kilborn

“We ought to thank President Bush. He made it a lot easier for people to do taxes this year. No job, no income tax this year.”

People Years Made Jobs President Ought Easier Taxes Income Made It President Bush Income Tax

Author:Jay Leno

“One critic in the L.A. Times said John Kerry looks like he is thinking too much. Well this is one place President Bush has him beat.”

Thinking Wells Looks Said President Too Much Beats Critics President Bush John Kerry Thinking Too Much

Author:Jay Leno

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