“Lindsey Graham is now the seventh Republican running for president. If you're keeping score, that's basically one Republican candidate for every two Republican voters.” IfsTwoRunningPresidentRepublicanCandidatesScoreVoters Author:Conan O'Brien
“I can't wait for the Republican debates to start and there's literally 65 guys on one stage.” I CanGuyWaitingStageRepublicanDebate Author:Conan O'Brien
“The U.S. unemployment rate is the lowest it's been in nearly seven years. The job sector that has seen the most growth is in the field of Republican presidential candidates.” YearsJobsGrowthFieldsRepublicanSevenRatePresidentialCandidatesUnemploymentLowestSeven YearsPresidential CandidateUnemployment Rate Author:Conan O'Brien
“A new presidential poll reveals that Democrats have the edge among voters under 30. The good news for Republicans is that there's only six people under 30 who actually vote.” PeopleRepublicanSixNewsVoteDemocratEdgesPresidentialVotersGood NewsPolls Author:Conan O'Brien
“The big story is Bruce Jenner. In last week's interview, Jenner said he's a woman who is transitioning his body from male to female, and he's also a conservative Republican. Bruce said he looks forward to bashing Obamacare as soon as he finishes using it.” LooksSaidStoriesBodyBigsLastsWeekRepublicanFemaleMalesConservativeInterviewsObamacare Author:Conan O'Brien
“The top 15 contenders for the Republican nomination own at least 40 guns among them. If we elect a Republican president no one is hopping over the White House fence ever again.” IfsHousePresidentWhiteRepublicanGunWhite HouseFenceNominationsHopping Author:Conan O'Brien
“House Speaker John Boehner said the Republican Party will no longer stand in the way of gay marriage. Then Boehner said, 'Now can I go to Elton John's Oscar party?'” WaySaidHousePartyRepublicanGaySpeakersOscarsRepublican PartyGay Marriage Author:Conan O'Brien
“In a speech today, President Obama said that Michelle Obama is very strong and talented and she frequently tells him that he is wrong. As a result, Michelle Obama is now the Republican front-runner for 2016.” SaidTodayStrongPresidentResultsFrontsRepublicanSpeechPresident ObamaVery StrongRunners Author:Conan O'Brien
“According to a new poll, nearly six out of 10 Republicans want Mitt Romney to run for president. So do 10 out of 10 Democrats.” WantRunningPresidentRepublicanSixDemocratPollsRomney Author:Conan O'Brien
“A new Republican Congress is taking over. Sen. Ted Cruz has been appointed tooverseeing NASA in Congress. He says he wants NASA to focus on finding aliens so he can deport them.” WantHas BeensFocusRepublicanFindingsCongressAliensNasaCruz Author:Conan O'Brien
“This morning, due to a massive storm, at least 150,000 people in San Francisco were left without power. Of course, people in San Francisco without power are usually called Republicans.” PeopleCoursesLeftMorningRepublicanStormDuesMassiveSan Francisco Author:Conan O'Brien
“The Republican Party had a big day in yesterday's midterm elections and now controls the House and Senate. And don't ask me how this happened, but the Republican Party also gained control of three seats in our show's band.” ShowsBigsThreeAsksHousePartyHappenedRepublicanBandElectionYesterdayAsk MeSeatsSenateRepublican PartyMidtermsMidterm Elections Author:Conan O'Brien
“For the first time ever, a black Republican woman has been elected to Congress. President Obama told her, 'You are all set. This country never turns against a black anything.'” FirstsHas BeensCountryTurnsBlackPresidentRepublicanFirst TimeCongressPresident Obama Author:Conan O'Brien
“Utah could elect its first black Republican woman to Congress. In other words, Utah finally got one black person and the first thing they want to do is send her to Washington.” WantFirstsPersonsBlackRepublicanCongressUtahBlack Person Author:Conan O'Brien
“Republicans are already trying to paint Hillary Clinton as too old to be president. In fact, a new ad claims she’s so old that she could be a Republican.” TryingFactsPresidentRepublicanClaimsClintonPaintAds Author:Conan O'Brien
“President Obama, by the way, has set a Guinness World Record as the fastest person to get a million Twitter followers. Obama now has as many followers as the Republicans have presidential candidates.” WorldWayPersonsPresidentMillionsRecordsRepublicanPresidentialCandidatesFollowersPresident ObamaPresidential CandidateWorld RecordsGuinness Author:Conan O'Brien
“During last night's Republican debate, Mike Huckabee got a big laugh when he said that Congress has been spending money like John Edwards at a beauty salon. Then Huckabee got an even bigger laugh when he said he's running for president” Has BeensSaidBigsRunningLastsNightPresidentLaughingRepublicanBiggerCongressSpendingDebateLast NightMikeSpending MoneySalonsBeauty Salon Author:Conan O'Brien
“Political analysts are saying that as a candidate, Donald Trump is 'a totally unqualified nuisance.' In other words, he is a legitimate contender for the Republican nomination.” PoliticalTrumpRepublicanCandidatesNominationsAnalystsNuisanceUnqualified Author:Conan O'Brien
“Republican Congressman Duncan Hunter has filed papers to run for president. But in his official filing, he misspelled the word 'president.' Political experts say it's all part of Hunter's plan to attract Bush supporters.” RunningPoliticalPresidentPlansRepublicanPaperExpertsOfficialsSupporterHuntersPapersCongressmanFilingDuncan Author:Conan O'Brien
“Earlier tonight the second Republican debate took place here in California. With 10 men and only one woman, everyone thought they were watching 'The Bachelorette.'” MenRepublicanDebateCaliforniaTonightOne WomanBachelorette Author:Conan O'Brien
“Republicans have called for a National African-American Museum. The plan is being held up by finding a location that isn't in their neighborhood.” PlansRepublicanFindingsAfrican AmericanNeighborhoodMuseumsLocation Author:Conan O'Brien
“The Republican-controlled House voted to repeal the healthcare bill. If that goes well, they'll see what they can do about this whole 'women voting' thing.” IfsWellsWholeHouseCan DoRepublicanBillsVotingControlledHealthcare Author:Conan O'Brien
“President Obama held a ceremony at the White House to celebrate the first night of Hanukkah. In response, Republicans said, 'It's even worse than we thought. He's a Jewish Muslim.'” FirstsSaidNightHousePresidentWhiteRepublicanResponseCelebrateWhite HousePresident ObamaCeremonyHanukkah Author:Conan O'Brien
“Arnold Schwarzenegger is in trouble after tapes surfaced of him saying negative things about other Republicans. Actually the Schwarzenegger tapes surfaced last year, but they weren't deciphered until this week.” YearsLastsTroubleWeekRepublicanNegativeTapeLast YearSchwarzenegger Author:Conan O'Brien
“The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig. Political experts say that if Obama keeps insulting Palin, he could lose the election and win a job at MSNBC.” IfsStillsStoriesBigsTodayJobsPoliticalWinningLosesPolicyRepublicanElectionBarackExpertsPigsAccusedInsultingLipstickPalin Author:Conan O'Brien
“Possible controversy for the Obama campaign. Republicans are now accusing Barack Obama's campaign of voter fraud, because some of the people they've registered sound like they have fake names. Apparently, the fakest-sounding name is Barack Obama.” PeopleNamesSoundRepublicanCampaignsBarackFakeVotersFraudControversyAccusingVoter FraudObama Campaign Author:Conan O'Brien
“When it comes to being visionary in stealing, the Republicans do better than anybody. It's really something to see.” RepublicanFinancialStealingSkepticalVisionaries Author:Conan O'Brien
