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Alaska Quotes

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Alaska Quotes

“Even with all their threats of eternal damnation and soul roasting, Christian missionaries have run across some who were not so quick to swallow their drivel. Pleasure and pain, like beauty, are in the eye of the beholder. So, when missionaries ventured to Alaska and warned the Eskimos of the horrors of Hell and the blazing lake of fire awaiting transgressors, they eagerly asked: "How do we get there?"!”

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Book:The Satanic Bible
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“With all the global warming going around nowadays, it would only take the stubbornness of a mule and the patience of a sitting duck to achieve what no man has ever done before – namely melt the ice in a wax figure’s beaten heart that was chopped off and hidden 50 meters under the polar ice caps in Alaska, to protect it from feeling.”

HeartFeelingsBearsAchievementPatienceWarmProtectionIceWarmthFeelingStubbornMeltingAlaskaManlyStubbornnessMaleGlobalHiddenWarmingFigureWaxMulePolarDuck Feel
Book:Nothing is here...
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“She lifted me back into the seat with a wicked grin, and breathed, 'Just don’t stop talking. Whatever you do, just don’t stop talking,' and swallowed my manhood. I scrambled desperately through the darkened corners of my memory until I couldn’t take it anymore. I grabbed her by the hair and said, 'Now bend over, and I’ll do to you what the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries wants to keep the Federal government from doing to the state of Alaska.”

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Book:Indecision Now! A Libertarian Rage
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“This was informal, like most things in Alaska. Something we’d noticed already in our brief stay. People wore the clothes that were most comfortable for them, and obviously, that wasn’t any different in Faith Hospital. They weren’t taken aback by my appearance or haphazard stop. The causal family atmosphere drew me in, and I prayed silently for God’s guidance.”

FaithPrayerComfortChristian LifeCasualAlaskaInterviewAlaskanInformalAlaskan Author
Book:Alaskan Calibration: Alaskan Women of Caliber Series
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“In naming Gallery B for Elizabeth, we honor her today for her vision, her wisdom, and her courage in speaking out for what she believed to be right. She symbolizes the role the gallery plays in the legislative process. She reminds us that a single person, speaking from the heart, can affect the future of all Alaskans. -Fran Ulmer”

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Book:Fighter in Velvet Gloves: Alaska Civil Rights Hero Elizabeth Peratrovich
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“You Can See Russia From America! There are two small Islands in the middle of the Bering Straits that are 2.4 miles apart, and have the “International Date Line” running between them. The larger Island to the west is Russian and is named Ratmanov Island. It is considered the last island in the far eastern reach of Asia. Little Diomede Island or Ignaluk Island, belongs to Alaska and is the easternmost of the two islands. It is as far west as you can go before reaching the “International Date Line.” Although the two islands are within easy sight of each other they are 24 hours apart, with one being in tomorrow and the other being in today. There are approximately 170, mostly Native Americans, living on the smaller American island. During winter, an ice bridge usually spans the distance between these two islands, therefore there are times when it is possible to walk between the United States and Russia. This little stroll can be dangerous and is not advised; however at this location you can definitely see Russia from America.”

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Book:The Exciting Story of Cuba: Understanding Cuba's Present by Knowing Its Past
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“On Friday the 13th of April 2029, an asteroid large enough to fill the Rose Bowl as though it were an egg cup, will fly so close to Earth, that it will dip below the altitude of our communication satellites. We did not name this asteroid Bambi. Instead, it's named Apophis, after the Egyptian god of darkness and death. If the trajectory of Apophis at close approach passes within a narrow range of altitudes called the 'keyhole,' the precise influence of Earth's gravity on its orbit will guarantee that seven years later in 2036, on its next time around, the asteroid will hit Earth directly, slamming in the Pacific Ocean between California and Hawaii. The tsunami it creates will wipe out the entire west coast of North America, bury Hawaii, and devastate all the land masses of the Pacific Rim. If Apophis misses the keyhole in 2029, then, of course, we have nothing to worry about in 2036.”

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Author:Neil deGrasse Tyson
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“Genie understood that everyone would be trapped together inside this crippled city for the foreseeable future--in the snow, in the dark, with no electricity, in below-freezing temperatures. Under those circumstances, she felt 'mass hysteria would have meant total destruction.' (pg. 79)”

AlaskaModern HistoryEarthquakeRadio ShowsNews History
Book:This Is Chance!: The Shaking of an All-American City, a Voice That Held It Together
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“In ancient times, at this shallow cove, the Koyukon attacked our people. The women fought alongside the men, running half-naked from their homes to show their courage. The Elders took the children into their umiaqs, fleeing to the sea. The Elders shielded the children’s eyes but could not shield their ears, and land went silent. The Elders and children buried the Inupiaq and Koyukon people side-by-side on the stilts of the whalebone, then they journeyed north to begin again.”

Historical FictionIndigenousAlaskaArcticAncestorsIndigenous PeoplesInupiaqWhaleboneBowheadKoyukon
Book:Sivulliq: Ancestor
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“My husband trudged up the ridge, stumbling, but determined. My children and I watched him until he disappeared over the ridge, out of view, vanishing into the abyss. It wasn’t an extraordinary day, not foggy, not stormy, or a bright day. It was grey and cloudy when a good man and a good father walked up to face death like our people have done for a millennia.”

DeathHistorical FictionDeath And DyingIndigenousAlaskaArcticNative American LiteratureInupiaqAlaska Native Literature
Book:Sivulliq: Ancestor
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“Below deck is suffocating, smelling of sweaty, spermy, unwashed armpits, unwashed groins, moldy wood, bilge water, and the green smell of algae, all congealed in thick streams. I’ve learned to sleep by breathing out of my mouth. On deck, we escape the bed bugs biting away at our skin, clicking cockroaches hiding in the shadows, and the rats gnawing away at every cask. I look forward to the cold sea air.”

Historical FictionIndigenousAlaskaArcticNative American LiteratureInupiaqAlaska Native LiteratureYankee WhalersNew Bedford
Book:Sivulliq: Ancestor
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“At the Galapagos Islands, the cook wanted fresh wild pigs. He said we needed fresh meat to last until San Francisco. We tried. We heard pigs squealing on the island, running, large leaves moving as they ran underneath the foliage. Merihim said we’ve no time. So, we killed two large turtles, the biggest I’ve ever seen. The cook dried and cured the meat into jerky.”

Historical FictionSan FranciscoIndigenousAlaskaArcticNative American LiteratureInupiaqAlaska Native LiteratureGalápagos Islands
Book:Sivulliq: Ancestor
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“Gerald and I saw the Azore Islands, Talcahuano, Tumbez, San Francisco, and Nome from afar while the captain and officers rowed to shore for fresh food and fresh whalers. Even at Nome, not two days ago, Gerald and I watched the Alaskan town from the ship. We saw Talcahuano at night, the town alive with lights and torches. We heard music across the water. People celebrated an event on shore. We thought it might be a wedding. We imagined walking the clay, brick roads, ordering crabs and clams near the sea, sampling the local exotic fruits and plants growing in their vibrant colors and prickly skins, and of course, seducing the dark- skinned indigenous women emanating macadamia oil, musk, and leafy air. Merihim laughed at our children’s eyes and said to act like men, not like guttersnipes at a bakery window.”

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Book:Sivulliq: Ancestor
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“To wake up on a gloriously bright morning, in a tent pitched beneath spruce trees, and to look out lazily and sleepily for a moment from the open side of the tent, across the dead camp-fire of the night before, to the river, where the light of morning rests and perhaps some early-rising[240] native is gliding in his birch canoe; to go to the river and freshen one's self with the cold water, and yell exultingly to the gulls and hell-divers, in the very joy of living; or to wake at night, when you have rolled in your blankets in the frost-stricken dying grass without a tent, and to look up through the leaves above to the dark sky and the flashing stars, and hear far off the call of a night bird or the howl of a wolf: this is the poetry, the joy of a wild and roving existence, which cannot come too often”

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Book:Through the Yukon Gold Diggings
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“La mia novella di Natale, Un Cuore nella Bufera, inizia così... Mi sveglio di soprassalto, gli occhi spalancati nel buio, la notte rischiarata dal bagliore della neve che fuori continua a cadere. Trattengo il respiro, quasi in preda al panico. Non oso muovermi. Qualcosa non va. Mi faccio coraggio e giro appena il viso. Qualcosa decisamente non va. C’è un uomo incollato alla mia schiena. Il suo braccio destro mi stringe la vita, la sua mano avvolge il mio seno e che io sia dannata se quello che sento premere contro la mia schiena non è il suo… Oh.Mio.Dio! Mi alzo di scatto, accendo la luce del comodino e sbalordita fisso l’intruso. Mugugnando, quello si volta dall’altra parte, innocente come un serafino. Il suo cane-orso, ai piedi del letto, apre un occhio, poi riappoggia il grosso muso sulle zampe e riprende a russare. Il mio sguardo passa da uno all’altro senza posa, mentre invano cerco di respirare. Finalmente un refolo d’aria s’infila lungo i bronchi e cede ai polmoni l’ossigeno necessario affinché io possa elaborare una domanda sensata. Che cavolo ci fa Kyle Hartson nel mio letto?”

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Book:Un cuore nella bufera
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