Best Computer Programming Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 3

“Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to find an easy way of doing it.”

Men Way Hard Done Funny Jobs Easy Learning Hard Work Programming Lazy Laziness Computer Programming Programming Languages Sloth Computer Language Easy Way Indolence Lazy Man

Author:Walter Chrysler

“There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in their home.”

“The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.”

“There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.”

“Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork.”

People Technology Computer Programming Programmers Computer Programming Bikinis Computer Programmers Guesswork

Author:Sam Ewing

“The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it's too late.”

“Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the 'most reliable Windows ever.' To me, this is like saying that asparagus is 'the most articulate vegetable ever.'”

Technology Computer Window Versions Programming Vegetables Microsoft Computer Programming Asparagus

Book:Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, but Some Actual Journalism

Source: Boogers Are My Beat: More Lies, but Some Actual Journalism

“The best way to prepare [to be a programmer] is to write programs, and to study great programs that other people have written. In my case, I went to the garbage cans at the Computer Science Center and I fished out listings of their operating systems.”

“There's an old story about the person who wished his computer were as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone.”

Knows Persons Stories Use Wish Easy Technology Know How Computer Programming Software Telephones Computer Programming Computer Science Software Design Computer Software

Author:Bjarne Stroustrup

“If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.”

“When someone says, "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I want done," give him a lollipop.”

Want Needs Giving Done Language Programming Funny Inspirational Geek Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Developers Software Engineering Funny Computer Lollipop

Author:Alan Perlis

“Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind.”

Mind Reading Computer Following Programming Instruction Funny Inspirational Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Computing Software Engineering Computer Software Funny Computer Following Instructions

Book:The texbook

Source: The texbook

“A great lathe operator commands several times the wage of an average lathe operator, but a great writer of software code is worth 10,000 times the price of an average software writer.”

Technology Computer Average Command Code Programming Software Computer Programming Programming Languages Great Writers Computer Language Operators Computer Software Writing Code

Author:Bill Gates

“Any fool can use a computer. Many do.”

Use Technology Fool Computer Programming Computer Programming Developers Funny Computer Programming Funny

Author:Ted Nelson

“Computer language design is just like a stroll in the park. Jurassic Park, that is.”

Language Technology Design Computer Parks Programming Computer Programming Computer Language Jurassic Park Funny Computer Coders

Author:Larry Wall

“Computer science education cannot make anybody an expert programmer any more than studying brushes and pigment can make somebody an expert painter.”

Technology Study Computer Painter Code Experts Programming Brushes Programmers Computer Programming Computer Science Computer Programmers Pigment Science Education

Author:Eric S. Raymond

“Computers are getting smarter all the time. Scientists tell us that soon they will be able to talk to us. (And by 'they', I mean 'computers'. I doubt scientists will ever be able to talk to us.)”

Mean Able Technology Doubt Computer Scientist Programming Smarter Computer Programming

Author:Dave Barry

“Considering the current sad state of our computer programs, software development is clearly still a black art, and cannot yet be called an engineering discipline.”

“For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless. And then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are, in short, a perfect match.”

“It is not about bits, bytes and protocols, but profits, losses and margins.”

Bits Loss Technology Computer Profit Programming Margins Computer Programming Protocol

Author:Lou Gerstner

“It's ridiculous to live 100 years and only be able to remember 30 million bytes. You know, less than a compact disc. The human condition is really becoming more obsolete every minute.”

Knows Years Humans Able Remember Millions Technology Minutes Conditions Becoming Computer Ridiculous Programming Human Condition Obsolete Becoming More Computer Programming Compact Discs

Author:Marvin Minsky

“Most of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are three, of course: laziness, impatience, and hubris.”

“Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more 'user-friendly'... Their best approach so far has been to take all the old brochures and stamp the words 'user-friendly' on the cover.”

Trying Has Beens Technology Computer Approach Programming Friendly Software Users Stamps Packages Computer Programming Suppliers User Friendly Brochures

Author:Bill Gates

“The bulk of all patents are crap. Spending time reading them is stupid. It's up to the patent owner to do so, and to enforce them.”

Reading Technology Stupid Computer Spending Programming Owners Crap Computer Programming Patents Spending Time

Author:Linus Torvalds

“There are only two industries that refer to their customers as 'users'.”

Two Technology Industry Computer Customers Programming Users Computer Programming

Author:Edward Tufte

“They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.”

May Technology Computer Weapons Mass Destruction Programming Weapons Of Mass Destruction Mass Destruction Computer Programming

Author:Janet Reno

“Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.”

“Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.”

Should Technology Computer Compromise Programming Consideration Software Rejected Funny Inspirational Programmers Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Software Engineering Software Design Computer Programmers Computer Software

Author:Stan Kelly-Bootle

“Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand.”

Source: Refactoring: Ruby Edition

“The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.”

“As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in my own programs.”

“Complexity kills. It sucks the life out of developers, it makes products difficult to plan, build and test, it introduces security challenges, and it causes end-user and administrator frustration.”

“It has been said that the great scientific disciplines are examples of giants standing on the shoulders of other giants. It has also been said that the software industry is an example of midgets standing on the toes of other midgets.”

Has Beens Said Technology Example Industry Discipline Computer Standing Shoulders Giants Programming Software Toes Programmers Computer Programming Computer Programmers Midget Computer Software

Author:Alan Cooper

“That's what's cool about working with computers. They don't argue, they remember everything, and they don't drink all your beer.”

Remember Technology Drink Computer Arguing Beer Programming Computer Programming Remembers Everything

Author:Paul Leary

“The only people who have anything to fear from free software are those whose products are worth even less.”

People Technology Products Computer Programming Software Computer Programming

Author:David F. Emery

“You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic, but you cannot have both at the same time.”

Quality Technology Computer Programming Software Computer Programming Arithmetic Computer Software Pointers

Author:Bertrand Meyer

“You cannot teach beginners top-down programming, because they don't know which end is up.”

Knows Ends Teach Trust Programming Computer Programming Programming Languages Beginners Software Engineering Top Down

Author:Tony Hoare

“I will, in fact, claim that the difference between a bad programmer and a good one is whether he considers his code or his data structures more important. Bad programmers worry about the code. Good programmers worry about data structures and their relationships.”

Important Facts Differences Worry Trust Claims Structure Data Code Programming Programmers Computer Programming Computer Programmers Data Structures

Author:Linus Torvalds

“C is quirky, flawed, and an enormous success.”

Computer Enormous Programming Flawed Programmers Computer Programming Computer Science Programming Languages Quirky Computer Language Computer Programmers Programming Funny

Author:Dennis Ritchie

“The function of good software is to make the complex appear to be simple.”

Simple Computer Function Complexes Simplicity Programming Software Programmers Computer Programming Computer Programmers

Author:Grady Booch

“Just remember: you're not a 'dummy,' no matter what those computer books claim. The real dummies are the people who-though technically expert-couldn't design hardware and software that's usable by normal consumers if their lives depended upon it.”

“Optimism is an occupational hazard of programming; feedback is the treatment.”

Technology Computer Optimism Programming Treatment Feedback Hazards Computer Programming Computer Software Occupational Hazards

Book:Extreme Programming Explained: Embrace Change

Source: Extreme Programming Explained: Embrace Change

“If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution.”

Ifs Computer Program Programming Collections Execution Garbage Computer Programming Computer Science Programming Languages Computer Language Java Programming Funny

Author:Robert Sewell

“There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.”

“It should be noted that no ethically-trained software engineer would ever consent to write a DestroyBaghdad procedure. Basic professional ethics would instead require him to write a DestroyCity procedure, to which Baghdad could be given as a parameter.”

“That language is an instrument of human reason, and not merely a medium for the expression of thought, is a truth generally admitted.”

Humans Reason Language Learning Expression Instruments Mediums Programming Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Human Reason Lisp

Book:An Investigation of the Laws of Thought: On which are Founded the Mathematical Theories of Logic and Probabilities

Source: An Investigation of the Laws of Thought: On which are Founded the Mathematical Theories of Logic and Probabilities

“FORTRAN is not a flower but a weed - it is hardy, occasionally blooms, and grows in every computer.”

Grows Flower Computer Programming Weed Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Hardy

Book:Introduction to computer science

Source: Introduction to computer science

“It is easier to port a shell than a shell script.”

Easier Scripts Programming Shells Port Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language

Author:Larry Wall

“I made up the term "object-oriented," and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.”

Mind I Can Term Objects Programming Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language

Author:Alan Kay

“Computer system analysis is like child-rearing; you can do grievous damage, but you cannot ensure success.”

Children Can Do Computer Analysis Damage Programming Computer Programming Programming Languages Computer Language Child Rearing Computer Systems Systems Analysis

Book:Structured analysis and system specification

Source: Structured analysis and system specification

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Computer Programming Quotes