“Of course a politician's promise isn't worth the paper it's written on.”
Funny Oxymoron Quotes
Browse 28 quotes about Funny Oxymoron.
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Funny Oxymoron Quotes
“I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead.”
“If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive.”
“Any man who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.”
“The scene is dull. Tell him to put more life into his dying.”
“I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them at least five years.”
“Don't worry about the war. It's all over but the shooting.”
“I have a terrible memory; I never forget a thing.”
Source: Allegra Maud Goldman
“You should always go to other people's funerals, otherwise, they won't come to yours.”
“It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.”
Source: Bite-Size Twain: Wit and Wisdom from the Literary Legend
“Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.”
“We learn from history that man can never learn anything from history.”
“You should always live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.”
“Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.”