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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for business purposes. For example, if you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax decision: Where else are you going to read the paper? Outside? What if it rains?”

“Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.”

Funny Justice Powerful Humorous Rivers Definitions Witty Denial Egypt Stressed

Book:Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist

Source: Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist

“I'm no model lady. A model's just an imitation of the real thing.”

Real Women Justice Models Humorous Witty Sarcastic Imitation Modeling Real Things

Book:The wit and wisdom of Mae West

Source: The wit and wisdom of Mae West

“Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.”

Play Eye Remember Women Justice Fire Humorous Witty Smoke Sarcastic

Book:The wit and wisdom of Mae West

Source: The wit and wisdom of Mae West

“The humorous man recognizes that absolute purity, absolute justice, absolute logic and perfection are beyond human achievement and that men have been able to live happily for thousands of years in a state of genial frailty.”

Men Years Humans Has Beens States Able Justice Atheism Achievement Humorous Perfection Logic Absolutes Positive Atheism Purity Frailty

Book:Once Around the Sun

Source: Once Around the Sun

“I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it.”

Ifs Hate Justice Food Humorous Cooking Glad Culinary Spinach

Author:Clarence Darrow

“When love is gone, there's always justice. And when justice is gone, there's always force. And when force is gone, there's always Mom. Hi, Mom!”

Love Mother Force Justice Love Is Gone Mom Humorous

Author:Laurie Anderson

“I'll tell you how I'd like to be remembered: As a black man who won the heavyweight title - Who has humorous and who never looked down on those who looked up to him - A man who stood for freedom, justice and equality - And I wouldn't even mind if folks forgot how pretty I was.”

“As a writer and as a human being, Susan Dworkin has always had the ability to draw us into new dreams of justice, and to make them irresistibly practical, humorous and human. She makes clear that progress and pleasure go together.”

Humans Dream Together Justice Human Beings Ability Pleasure Clear Progress Draws Humorous Practicals

Author:Gloria Steinem

“Our civilization has decided that determining the guilt or innocence of men is a thing too important to be trusted to trained men. When it wants a library catalogued, or the solar system discovered, or any trifle of that kind, it uses up its specialists. But when it wishes anything done which is really serious, it collects twelve of the ordinary men standing round. The same thing was done, if I remember right, by the Founder of Christianity.”