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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for business purposes. For example, if you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the cost of your house, because, in the words of U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren Burger in a landmark 1979 tax decision: Where else are you going to read the paper? Outside? What if it rains?”

IfsUseBigsPurposeHouseJusticeDecisionStreetsExampleWallCostTaxesPaperHumorousRainCourtPossessionNewspapersSupremeChiefsCorporationsRelatedWhat IfJournalSupreme CourtBurgersLandmarksBig CorporationsDepreciateWall Street JournalChief JusticeBusiness Related
Author:Dave Barry
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“So she went into the garden to cut a cabbage leaf to make an apple pie; and at the same time a great she-bear, coming up the street pops its head into the shop. What! no soap? So he died, and she very imprudently married the barber; and there were present the Picninnies, and the Grand Panjandrum himself, with the little round button at top, and they all fell to playing the game of catch as catch can, till the gunpowder ran out at the heels of their boots.”

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Author:Samuel Foote
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“... Waiter! raw beef-steak for the gentleman's eye,-nothing like raw beef-steak for a bruise, sir; cold lamp-post very good, but lamp-post inconvenient-damned odd standing in the open street half-an-hour, with your eye against a lamp.”

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Book:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club, Volume 1 (of 2) (Illustrations)
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