“Donald Trump is attacking President Obama's background. And I said, 'Wait a minute, Trump also is from a mixed background. He's half jack and half ass.'” SaidWaitingPresidentHalfMinutesTrumpBackgroundsAssPresident ObamaAttacking Author:David Letterman
“Donald Trump may be running for president. He said he is sick and tired of the rest of the world laughing at the United States. Well, President Trump will certainly put an end to that.” WorldWellsMaySaidEndsStatesRunningPresidentUnitedUnited StatesLaughingTrumpSickTired Author:David Letterman
“President Obama and his wife are going to Kenya. Donald Trump said, 'While you're there, pick up your birth certificate.'” SaidPresidentWifeTrumpBirthPicksPresident ObamaKenyaCertificatesBirth Certificate Author:David Letterman
“I was 13 or 14 and I met Donald Trump at a bar mitzvah of a good friend of ours, who's friends with him. He had his girlfriend at the time with him, that Melania with him. He said, 'Hey guys, if you work hard and be successful, you'll get one of these.' I'll never forget that. And now he's married to her.” IfsSaidHardGuyForgetSuccessfulHard WorkTrumpMetsMarriedBarsHeyGirlfriendBeing SuccessfulNever ForgetHockeyGood FriendNhlBar MitzvahMitzvah Author:Jason Spezza
“Presidential candidate Donald Trump had a meeting with Ted Cruz. He said he does not know why he agreed to fly to New York to meet Ted Cruz and then he promised to bring that kind of leadership to the Oval Office.” KnowsKindDoeSaidNew YorkTrumpOfficeMeetingsPresidentialCandidatesCruzPresidential CandidateOval Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump announced that he's running for president. During his speech he told the crowd that if elected he would be 'the greatest jobs president that God ever created.' Then God said, 'Hey, don't drag me into this publicity stunt.'” IfsSaidWould BeRunningJobsPresidentTrumpSpeechCrowdsHeyDragPublicity Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Donald Trump's not backing down. Yesterday he said he doesn't need to be lectured by the other Republican candidates, who he says have no business running for president. Not to be confused with Donald Trump, who ran for president and now has no business.” NeedsSaidRunningPresidentTrumpRepublicanYesterdayRanConfusedCandidatesBacking Down Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Donald Trump got in some trouble for saying that John McCain is not a war hero, and said, 'I like people that weren't captured.' Not good. In fact, Trump's people are telling him to lay low for a while until this all combs over.” PeopleSaidWarFactsTroubleTrumpHeroLowsLaysCapturedMccainCombsWar Hero Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Rick Perry said Donald Trump is unfit to be president and called for him to immediately withdraw from the race. Then he said, 'And that's coming from ME!'” SaidPresidentRaceTrump Author:Jimmy Fallon
“After Donald Trump wrote Lindsey Graham's cellphone number on a piece of paper and showed it to everybody, Graham said he's getting a new phone. Which explains Lindsey Graham's latest campaign slogan, 'New phone, who dis?'” SaidNumbersPiecesTrumpPaperPhonesCampaignsSlogansCellphone Author:Jimmy Fallon
“In a recent interview, John McCain addressed Trump's campaign rally in Arizona and said that he just quote, 'fired up the crazies.' Not to be confused with Trump's show 'Celebrity Apprentice,' where he just FIRED the crazies.” SaidShowsTrumpCampaignsConfusedInterviewsArizonaMccainApprenticeFired Up Author:Jimmy Fallon
“MSNBC host Lawrence O'Donnell is saying Donald Trump lied when he said he made $20 million a year off his 'Apprentice' series on NBC. NBC also denied Trump's claim, saying, 'We don't have $20 million. We're NBC.'” YearsMadeSaidMillionsTrumpClaimsSeriesHostDeniedLiedApprenticeNbc Author:Jimmy Fallon
“It’s said that the shuffling of the cards is the earth, and the pattering of the cards is the rain, and the beating of the cards is the wind, and the pointing of the cards is the fire. That’s of the four suits. But the Greater Trumps, it’s said, are the meaning of all process and the measure of the everlasting dance.” SaidEarthProcessFireGreaterFourWindTrumpRainCardsSuitsEverlastingPointingShuffling Book:The Greater Trumps Source: The Greater Trumps
“It seems like everybody's weighing in on Trumps campaign - even Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban. He said that Trump is 'probably the best thing to happen to politics in a long, long time.' Then Trump was like, 'Well, at least one Cuban loves me.'” WellsLongSaidSeemsHappensTrumpLong TimeMarkCampaignsBest ThingsOwnersCubanDallasWeighingMaverick Author:Jimmy Fallon
“I saw that Donald Trump is selling his penthouse suite at the Trump Park Avenue building here in New York City for $21 million. When asked why he's selling it now, Trump said 'Hey, Americans seem to be buying everything else I'm selling, so why not strike while the iron's hot.'” SaidSeemsCitiesMillionsSawsNew YorkBuildingTrumpHotStrikesSellingHeyParksBuyingIronWhy NotNew York CityAvenuesPenthouses Author:Jimmy Fallon
“In several speeches and interviews, Donald Trump has brought up his book 'The Art of the Deal,' and said that Obama would have negotiated a better deal with Iran if he had read it. It got even more awkward for Obama when Iran was like, 'It worked for us - you guys got screwed!'” IfsArtSaidBookGuyDealsTrumpSpeechInterviewsIranAwkward Author:Jimmy Fallon
“In a speech in Texas, Donald Trump called Hillary Clinton 'easily the worst Secretary of State in the history of our country.' When asked what he based that on, Trump said, 'I heard ME say it just now. So it's gotta be true.'” SaidCountryStatesHeardWorstTrumpSpeechClintonBeing TrueOur CountryTexasSecretary Author:Jimmy Fallon
“One GOP Congressman named Carlos Curbelo actually suggested that Donald Trump may be a 'phantom candidate' that has been planted by Democrats. The DNC strongly denied this - while Hillary said, 'Crap, they figured it out! Take off the wig, Bill.'” MayHas BeensSaidTrumpBillsDemocratCandidatesDeniedCrapPhantomsCongressmanWigsGop Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Chris Christie said he will top Donald Trump's Iowa State Fair helicopter entrance by riding in on a pony. As a result, all the ponies in Iowa have gone into hiding.” SaidStatesResultsGoneTrumpFairsHidingRidingEntrancesIowaHelicoptersPoniesChristie Author:Conan O'Brien
“A top aide to Donald Trump says he quit the campaign this weekend because of Trump's public feuds, but Trump said he was fired. When asked what he was fired for, Trump said, 'Quitting!'” SaidTrumpQuittingCampaignsWeekendFeuds Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Donald Trump insisted he's always had a great relationship with women. He said, 'I believe a woman can be anything she wants to be, whether that's Miss USA or Miss Universe. Either one.'” WantBelieveSaidUniverseI BelieveMissingTrumpUsaGreat Relationship Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump said prior to the debate that he wants to be very civil. He said that instead of referring to all Hispanics as criminals, he'll call them criminal Americans.” WantSaidTrumpCriminalsDebateReferring Author:Conan O'Brien
“In an exclusive interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network Donald Trump said "I believe in god." But of course The Donald was talking about Himself.” BelieveSaidChristianCoursesI BelieveTalkingTrumpI Believe InInterviewsBelieve In GodExclusiveBroadcastingI Believe In God Author:Jay Leno
“Today Donald Trump reaffirmed his stance against gay marriage. Trump said marriage is between a rich guy and his much younger third wife.” SaidTodayGuyRichWifeTrumpGayThirdsGay MarriageStanceAgainst Gay Marriage Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up. Say what you want about Trump, at least this guy has his priorities in order. He doesn't want to let actual reality get in the way of his reality show.” WayWantSaidShowsRealityRunningGuyOrderTrumpSeasonsCurrentsWhat You WantPrioritiesPresidencyThis GuyWrapsApprenticeReality Shows Author:Jay Leno
“At his campaign launch, Donald Trump apparently paid extras $50 to cheer for him at the rally. Trump said, 'Usually when I pay a person to like me, it's my wife.'” PersonsSaidPayWifeTrumpPaidMy WifeCampaignsLike MeExtrasCheer Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump said he still wants to look more closely at Obama's birth certificate to make sure that it's real. Incidentally, President Obama said the same exact thing about Donald Trump's hair.” WantLooksSaidStillsRealPresidentHairTrumpBirthPresident ObamaCertificatesBirth Certificate Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Gary Busey said on the Today Show yesterday that Donald Trump would make a great President. Now Trump just needs endorsements from Randy Quaid and Charlie Sheen.” NeedsSaidShowsTodayPresidentTrumpYesterdayCharlieGaryEndorsementsRandyGreat PresidentsQuaid Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump said that if President Obama releases his birth certificate, Trump will release his tax return. Obama said he won't run for a second term if Trump releases that thing on his head.” IfsSaidRunningPresidentTermReturnTrumpBirthTaxesReleasePresident ObamaCertificatesBirth CertificateTax Returns Author:Conan O'Brien
“On Fox News, Donald Trump said Obama's birth certificate could indicate that he's a Muslim. Trump said he doesn't trust anyone with a foreign-sounding name, and neither does his daughter Ivanka.” DoeSaidNamesTrumpBirthNewsDaughterFoxesFox NewsCertificatesBirth Certificate Author:Conan O'Brien
“Trump said that he hoped bin Laden suffered a lot. It looks like he got his wish, because the CIA said bin Laden spent his last hour watching 'Celebrity Apprentice.'” LooksSaidLastsWishHoursTrumpCiaBin LadenApprentice Author:Conan O'Brien
“People are mad a Donald Trump for allegedly making a joke about Megyn Kelly having her period. Trump said, 'Trust me, I know what goes on down there, because I'm a huge douche.'” PeopleKnowsSaidHugeGoes OnTrumpPeriodsJokesMadTrust MeDouches Author:Conan O'Brien
“Once having said no to Donald Trump, Mitt Romney can't go back and say, I changed my mind, I'm bowing to the pressure from you.” MindSaidChangedTrumpPressureRomney Author:Chris Matthews
“I thought the Wall Street Journal quote, they got a guy in Iowa to say I think exactly where I think this race is right now for a lot Republicans. He said, "Nobody in Iowa wants [Donald]Trump for president. But everybody in Iowa wants somebody like Trump for president." That's what you need.” ThinkingWantNeedsSaidGuyPresidentRaceStreetsWallTrumpRepublicanRight NowJournalIowaWall Street Journal Author:Dalia Mogahed
“Because people were attracted to him because he was not elected to an office. He was not a politician. And like you said before, he was a person that people say "Wow! He has the idea!" But the more and more you listen to Donald Trump, the more you have the sense that he is not the person that's going to run the country. And I have strong views.” PeoplePersonsSaidIdeasCountryRunningStrongViewsLike YouTrumpPoliticianOfficeWow Author:Dalia Mogahed
“Donald Trump's mother, who said, Donnie! Stop playing Monopoly and get in that barber's chair! Never got a dinner!” SaidMotherTrumpDinnerChairsMonopolyBarbers Author:Red Buttons
“As one person said to me , Republicans know [Donald] Trump is a stain on their party.” KnowsPersonsSaidPartyTrumpRepublicanStains Author:Mara Liasson
“I think that's why we see this mixed reaction - Republican congressional leaders like Paul Ryan speaking out very firmly, but Republican candidates not as much, with the exception of the candidates in the single digits like Jeb Bush or Lindsey Graham, who said how to make America great again tell - Donald Trump to go to hell.” ThinkingSaidAmericaLeaderHellTrumpRepublicanReactionsCandidatesExceptionGo To HellSpeaking Out Author:Mara Liasson
“Michael Rubio said Trump's plan was impulsive and not well thought out. The other thing that's really annoying Republicans is that this was supposed to be their great week. The president gave a speech on terrorism that was not well received. They were working hard to tie Hillary Clinton to the president. Then along comes Donald Trump, and the story changes dramatically.” WellsSaidHardStoriesPresidentPlansWeekTrumpRepublicanSpeechClintonTerrorismSupposed To BeTiesAnnoyingImpulsive Author:Mara Liasson
“The [Hillary] Clinton campaign posted a pretty clever online quiz that makes a similar point with the Republican presidential field. Who said it? Donald Trump or not Donald Trump? For example, quote, "I mean you can prove you are a Christian. You can`t prove it, then you err on the side of caution." That was not Donald Trump. It was this guy, who strongly denounced Trump`s proposed Muslim ban but supports a religious test for refugees.” MeanSaidChristianGuySidesReligiousSupportExampleFieldsTrumpRepublicanProveTestsClintonCampaignsCleverPresidentialOnlineRefugeeThis GuyCautionBansProve ItQuiz Author:Chris Hayes
“Donald Trump has opened [ politically correct enforcement] up wide. He`s made a very bold statement and he`s backed it back just a little bit when he said it is temporary.” LittlesMadeSaidBitsTrumpLittle BitWideStatementsTemporaryEnforcementPolitically Correct Author:Ted Cruz
“I think Steve King is absolutely wrong and I just hope that we can try to reach higher ground, because when you are spewing this kind of nonsense, things that Donald Trump says, Ben Carson says, but also [Marco] Rubio and [Ted] Cruz and even Jeb Bush have said.” ThinkingTryingKindSaidTrumpKingsHigherNonsenseCruzMarcosHigher GroundBen Carson Author:Steve King
“Even though me and Paul Ryan disagree on a whole lot of things, when he stood up and confronted those ugly words that [Donald] Trump said, I was proud of him.” SaidWholeTrumpProudUglyDisagreeStood UpProud Of Him Author:Steve King
“Two months ago Donald Trump said that ISIS was not our fight. Just two months ago he said that Hillary Clinton would be a great negotiator with Iran. And he gets his foreign policy experience from the shows.” SaidTwoShowsWould BeFightingPolicyMonthsTrumpClintonIranForeign PolicyIsisTwo Months Author:Jeb Bush
“I think it's very sad that CNN leads Jeb Bush, down a road by starting off virtually all the questions, "Mr. Trump this, Mister" - I think it's very sad. I watched the first debate, and the first long number of questions were, "Mr. Trump said this, Mr. Trump said that. Mr. Trump" - these poor guys - although, I must tell you, [Rick] Santorum, good guy. Governor [Mike] Huckabee, good guy. They were very nice, and I respect them greatly. But I thought it was very unfair that virtually the entire early portion of the debate was Trump this, Trump that, in order to get ratings, I guess.” ThinkingFirstsLongSaidGuyOrderPoorNumbersNiceTrumpStartingDebatePortionsGovernorsUnfairMikeVery NiceGood GuyRatingCnnVery Sad Author:Jeb Bush
“Donald Trump said it was his idea for [Sarah] Palin to bring up her son at the rally.” SaidIdeasSonTrumpPalin Author:Chris Hayes
“One was Donald Trump said he didn't think Megyn Kelly had been fair to him. But he also talked about Fox's response to this. And multiple sources have said that this was authored by Roger Ailes himself.” ThinkingSaidSourceTrumpFairsResponseMultipleFoxesRoger Author:Ryan Grim
“Roger Ailes said, we learned from a secret back channel that the ayatollah and Putin both intend to treat Donald Trump unfairly when they meet with him if he becomes president.” IfsSaidPresidentSecretTrumpTreatsPutinRoger Author:Michel Martin
“Donald Trump said he didn't think Megyn Kelly had been fair to him. But he also talked about Fox's response to this.” ThinkingSaidTrumpFairsResponseFoxes Author:Michel Martin