“The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.” CompanyMillionsTeacherDollarsShyRetirementQuartersRetiringMillion DollarsAccountingAccountantsFunny Retirement Author:Milton Berle
“One teacher recently retired with a half-million dollars after 30 years of working hard, caring, dedicating herself and totally immensing herself in the problems of the students. That gave her $50. The rest of the money came from the death of a rich uncle.” YearsHardProblemEducationHalfMillionsRichTeacherTeachingStudentsDollarsCaringUnclesRetiredMillion Dollars Author:Milton Berle
“At Christmas you can get real bargains. I saw one item marked down ten dollars. It was a yacht.” RealSawsTenDollarsChristmasItemsGet RealBargainsYacht Author:Milton Berle
“I bought a Christmas tree for twenty dollars. When I came home the next day, my wife was wearing it in her hair.” HomeNextWifeTreeHairTwentiesDollarsMy WifeChristmasNext DayChristmas Tree Author:Milton Berle
“I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.” UsedFiveWifeTwentiesDollarsMy WifeChristmasCoatsPaymentTwenty FiveCertificatesMinkMink Coats Author:Milton Berle
