“Do you know anything at all that nobody else knows or, for that matter, gives a damn about? If you do, then sit tight, because one of these days you're going to Hollywood as a technical supervisor on a million dollar movie.” IfsKnowsGivingMatterFunnyMillionsHollywoodDollarsThese DaysCaliforniaDamnDo You KnowMillion DollarsSupervisors Author:S. J. Perelman
“FREEDLEY: Will I feel better after I take it? DR. FITCH (coldly): I, am a physician, Freedley, not an astrologer. If you want a horoscope, there's a gypsy tearoom over on Lexington Avenue.” IfsWantFeelsHumorFunnyMedicineFeel BetterPhysiciansDrsAvenuesGypsyHoroscopesLexington Author:S. J. Perelman
“If, at the close of business each evening, I myself can understand what I've written, I feel the day hasn't been totally wasted.” IfsFeelsWrittenEvening Author:S. J. Perelman
“I don't know where we're going or how we'll get there, but when we get there we'll be there - and that's something, even if it's nothing.” IfsKnows Author:S. J. Perelman
“Where would the Rockefellers be today if old John D. had gone on selling short-weight kerosene ... to widows and orphans instead of wisely deciding to mulct the whole country.” IfsCountryWholeTodayGoneWeightEntrepreneurSellingWidowsOrphanWidows And Orphans Author:S. J. Perelman
“If travel has taught me nothing more, and it certainly has, it's this: you never know when some trifling incident, utterly without significance, may pitchfork you into adventure or, by the same token, may not.” IfsKnowsMayTaughtAdventureTravelSignificanceIncidentsTokensTriflingPitchforks Author:S. J. Perelman
