“My mate asked me "What do you think of voluntary work?" I said "I wouldn't do it if you paid me."” IfsThinkingSaidHumorFunnyPaidMates Author:Tim Vine
“Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother, Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin.” PeopleThinkingWorldHumorFunnyFatherFiveBrotherDadMy FamilyMy DadChineseMumOlder BrotherDysfunctional FamilyYounger BrotherMy Little BrotherYoung Brother Author:Tim Vine
“I sit in places like Costa Coffee in Banstead and write rubbish. I need a deadline. I think about the 44 tour dates and keep imagining standing in front of all these people. Then every day I write 15 jokes minimum.” PeopleThinkingNeedsWritingFrontsJokesStandingCoffeeMinimumDeadlineRubbish Author:Tim Vine
“People think that because of my act that I must have a really busy mind and I must be driven. I really am not. I quite like going outside and looking at spiders on a hedge in my garden and stuff.” PeopleThinkingMindStuffGardenBusyDrivenSpiders Author:Tim Vine
