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Humorous Quotes

Browse 3047 quotes about Humorous.

Humorous Quotes

“If I freely may discover What should please me in my lover, I would have her fair and witty, Savouring more of court than city; A little proud, but full of pity; Light and humorous in her toying, Oft building hopes, and soon destroying, Long, but sweet in the enjoying; Neither too easy nor to hard; All extremes I would have barr'd.”

Source: Delphi Complete Works of Ben Jonson (Illustrated)

“In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It’s called Karoshi. I don’t want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you see a bright light and hear dead relatives beckon.”

Want Light Happens Funny Death Work Break Humorous Tricks Department Employee Japan Bright Lights

Book:The Dilbert principle: a cubicle's-eye view of bosses, meetings, management fads & other workplace afflictions

Source: The Dilbert principle: a cubicle's-eye view of bosses, meetings, management fads & other workplace afflictions

“The attempt to develop a sense of humor and to see things in a humorous light is some kind of a trick learned while mastering the art of living.”

Kind Art Light Humorous Tricks Sense Of Humor Search For Meaning Art Of Living Mans Search For Meaning

Book:Man's Search For Meaning, Gift Edition

Source: Man's Search For Meaning, Gift Edition

“Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.”

Love Life Light Funny Happiness Success Attitude Family Humorous Blessed Witty Cracked

Author:Groucho Marx

“The ladies men admire, I've heard, Would shudder at a wicked word. Their candle gives a single light, They'd rather stay at home at night. They do not keep awake 'till three, Nor read erotic poetry. They never sanction the impure, Nor recognize an overture. They shrink from powders and from paints... So far I've had no complaints.”

Men Giving Home Light Night Three Heard Humorous Paint Admire Awake Wicked Candle Complaints Erotic Shrinks Sanctions Powder Stay At Home Ladies Man

Book:Not So Deep as a Well

Source: Not So Deep as a Well

“It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one’s hat keeps blowing off.”

Humor Light Funny Science Impossible Humorous Faster Hats Funny Travel Desirable Speed Of Light

Book:The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose

Source: The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose

“In my experience, you run into trouble when you ask a group of beer-drinking men to perform any task more complex than remembering not to light the filter ends of cigarettes.”

Men Ends Humor Light Running Funny Remember Asks Trouble Groups Drink Humorous Tasks Wine Drinking Complexes Alcohol Beer Cigarette Liquor Filters Beer Drinking

Book:Dave Barry's Greatest Hits

Source: Dave Barry's Greatest Hits

“As a profession advertising is young; as a force it is as old as the world. The first four words ever uttered, Let there be light, constitute its charter. All nature is vibrant with its impulse.”

World Firsts Light Young Force Four Humorous Profession Advertising Impulse Charter

Author:Bruce Barton

“I was told to hand over my disposable lighter, to prevent, I suppose, any threat of "Do what I say or I'll light this Marlboro and you'll all die - in thirty years due to inhalation of secondhand smoke."”

Years Humor Hands Light Funny Dies Food Humorous Threat Dues Smoke Thirty Airline Thirty Years Lighters Disposable Air Travel Secondhand Smoke

Book:Peace Kills

Source: Peace Kills

“Babies should enjoy the freedom to vocalize whether it be in church, a public meeting place, during a movie, or after hours when the lights are out. They have not yet learned that joy and laughter have to last a lifetime and must be conserved.”

Should Children Humor Light Kids Funny Lasts Joy Enjoy Hours Church Baby Laughter Humorous Meetings Lifetime After Hours

Book:Forever, Erma: Best-Loved Writing From America's Favorite Humorist

Source: Forever, Erma: Best-Loved Writing From America's Favorite Humorist