J.S. Mason Quotes

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Browse famous quotes by J.S. Mason.

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Famous J.S. Mason Quotes

“The guests also clanked together the special romantic shaped forks with hearts on the points, called valentines.”

Funny Romance Romantic Witty Clever Valentine Hearts Forks Quirky Valentine S Day

Book:A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

Source: A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

“The groomer wasn’t provided any dental care or skin care and that’s the truth. Just ask his dentdermatautologist, he’ll tell you.”

Funny Humorous Logic Witty Clever Absurd Satire Dentist Quirky Dermatology

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

Source: The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

“That and the music was blaring. So loud that the radio station asked if they could keep it down as they cared about the safety of their listeners.”

Humor Funny Music Listening Radio Witty Caring Clever Absurd Quirky

Book:A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

Source: A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

“her hips were having an argument with the upper half of her body as to who was to get more eye contact”

Funny Fun Beauty Humorous Argument Witty Clever Hips Hilarious Quirky

Book:Whisky Hernandez

Source: Whisky Hernandez

“She could see a police car zooming into the parking lot and she ushered with her hands like a bullfighter on a runway that had lost his cape, but needed to get out of Spain to atone for his sins”

Funny Sin Humorous Witty Clever Spain Hilarious Quirky Sins Matador

Book:Whisky Hernandez

Source: Whisky Hernandez

“The following morning, Wilhelmina awoke to a lone lily pad moaning after escaping from an exquisite Monet painting piece that was hosting some shades of watercolor chips that were a century and half-oldish that subbed as a dish for artsy gourmet-eating tadpoles that had both a yearning for the foggy past and longing for their froggy future.”

Humor Funny Painting Longing Witty Clever Absurd Yearning Quirky Frog

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

Source: The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

“I’d say he’s about 5’12,” Sebastian said. “That’s 6’,” Whisky said. “Yeah, same thing.”

Funny Fun Humorous Witty Silly Clever Height Hilarious Quirky Approximation

Book:Whisky Hernandez

Source: Whisky Hernandez

“much like a when a bullfighter comes home he struts through the matadoor”

Humor Funny Humorous Witty Wit Clever Absurd Quirky Bullfighting Matador

Book:A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

Source: A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious Bites

“The vet was open this late, because he needed the business and the money to keep the “not closed” sign lit.”

Funny Witty Medical Clever Evening Quirky Nighttime Veterinarian Vet

Book:The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand Delights

Source: The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand Delights

“He had been shuffled out so quickly he didn’t even realize what he was wearing, like a King of Spades who wanted to file a complaint to the playing card company manufacturer for not drawing him a garden tool like he specifically asked for.”

Funny Humorous Witty Complaining Clever Cards Gardening King Quirky Playing Cards

Book:The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand Delights

Source: The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand Delights

About the Author

Known for: Author
Quotes: 77

Books & Sources

A Dragon, A Pig, and a Rabbi Walk into a Bar...and other Rambunctious BitesRelated source material

The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating TreatsRelated source material

Whisky HernandezRelated source material

The Ghost Therapist...And Other Grand DelightsRelated source material

The Stork Ate My Brother...And Other Totally Believable StoriesRelated source material