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Karl Pilkington Quotes

Television personality

Karl Pilkington is a British television personality known for his humor and genuine personality. Born on September 23, 1972, he gained popularity through his appearances on shows like 'The Ricky Gervais Show' and 'QI'.

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All Ifs People Knows Funny Thinking Bits Stuff Wells Problem Eye Should Animal Bigs Ends Holiday Looks Reason Wonder Annoying Done

Famous Karl Pilkington Quotes

“There is someone for everyone, i'nt there. That's always my thing. And it's reassuring I think.”

Thinking Reassuring

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I'm a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, "I wasn't as bad as I thought I would be", then I'll be happy. Until then, I'll be thinking, "I shouldn't be here!"”

Ifs Thinking I Can Would Be Bits Knowing Rubbish

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I am pessimistic, I think that's the best way to be, because if you're always expecting the best - the best doesn't always happen. Nine times out of 10 it doesn't. I'm surprised when things go smoothly. I don't know what's wrong with being pessimistic - unless you are such a pessimist that you don't do anything.”

Ifs Thinking Knows Way Happens Nine Best Way Expecting Pessimist Pessimistic Expecting The Best

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I just sort of go along and say what I think -and that's all you can do in life, really.”

Thinking Can Do

Author:Karl Pilkington

“The other day I was thinking - because I get a lot of headaches - I was wondering whether the head should be where it is. Because, at the end of the day, it's probably the heaviest part of your body, right? And yet it's at the top as opposed to, I don't, dangling at the bottom somewhere.”

Thinking Should Ends Body Wonder Bottom Your Body The End Of The Day Headache

Author:Karl Pilkington

“People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone!”

People Thinking Wells Chickens Ducks Load

Author:Karl Pilkington

“The problem I have with all this religion stuff is that I can't relate to it. I think most people got into 'cos it gave them something to do on a Sunday, but since all the shops are now open it isn't required as much.”

People Thinking I Can Problem Stuff Relate Shops Sunday

Book:An Idiot Abroad: The Travel Diaries of Karl Pilkington

Source: An Idiot Abroad: The Travel Diaries of Karl Pilkington

“I told her that I can't be doing with the Wonder part of these trips, but she said it should be the icing on the cake... I've never liked wedding cake due to the amount of icing, but then imagine a wedding cake without it; just a dark, stodgy, horrible dry sponge. The icing covers up the mess, and that's how I feel about most of the Wonders. They use them to get people to visit a place that you probably wouldn't think about visiting.”

Source: An Idiot Abroad: The Travel Diaries of Karl Pilkington

“I think people would live a bit longer if they didn't know how old they were. Age puts restrictions on things.”

People Ifs Thinking Knows Age Bits Know How Restriction

Author:Karl Pilkington

“Well I'm trying to think what I put in... I think I put in 'why?' to see if I'd confuse the computer.”

Ifs Thinking Trying Wells Computer

Author:Karl Pilkington

“People moan about drugs being tested on animals. I sort of think it depends innit. If the drug's aspirin and the monkey's got a headache, is it right?”

People Ifs Thinking Animal Depends Drug Monkeys Tested Headache Aspirin

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I think it's clever how Rome have kept a load of old stuff. There's no overheads, yet people are going over there to see it.”

People Thinking Stuff Clever Rome Load Overhead Old Stuff

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I don’t think I’ve ever felt this lost, even in Wales.”

Thinking Lost Felt Wales

Author:Karl Pilkington

“Classes teaching you how to breathe. I'm 32, I think I've got the hang of it.”

Thinking Funny Class Teaching Breathe

Author:Karl Pilkington

“I don't think I'd be a very good parent. I'd be too honest.”

Thinking Parent Honest Very Good Good Parent

Author:Karl Pilkington

“There’s fish in here that I’ve read about that are so see-through that they’re invisible. So I don’t even think they know they exist.”

Thinking Knows Fishes Invisible

Author:Karl Pilkington

About the Author

Born: September 23, 1972
Known for: Television personality
Quotes: 196

Books & Sources

An Idiot Abroad: The Travel Diaries of Karl PilkingtonRelated source material

Happyslapped by a Jellyfish: The words of Karl PilkingtonRelated source material

The World of Karl PilkingtonRelated source material

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