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Fruitcake Quotes

Browse 30 quotes about Fruitcake.

Fruitcake Quotes

“A sharp bolt of hunger hit Luther hard. His knees almost buckled, his poker face almost grimaced. For two weeks now his sense of smell had been much keener, no doubt a side effect of a strict diet. Maybe he got a whiff of Mabel's finest, he wasn't sure, but a craving came over him. Suddenly, he had to have something to eat. Suddenly, he wanted to snatch the bag from Kendall, rip open a package, and start gnawing on a fruitcake.”

HumorHumourDietFruitcakeSkipping Christmas
Author:John Grisham
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“There's still a hefty amount of protocol, and even if the bride and groom look like they've respectively stepped out of The Nightmare Before Christmas and an Archie comic, the royal tradition is---" "The brandy-soaked, raisin spotted, intestine-clogging brick known as fruitcake," Pet interrupted. "Will look and taste the same whether it was made yesterday or two decades ago. And at no time during its lengthy existence will anyone want to eat it. I've told you, the bride likes chocolate cake. Specifically and vitally, she apparently likes your Death by Chocolate fudge cake. Very little about this couple conforms to royal standards, which is half the reason the bookies are already taking revolting odds on how long the marriage will last, or if they'll actually make it to the altar. Rose is infamously a strong personality and a massive pain in her family's arse. I guarantee that however she has to bend to tradition, she'll wrangle final say over details like the inside of her cake.”

PrincessUnorthodoxWedding CakeFruitcakeBride And GroomOdd CoupleWedding PlanningDeath By Chocolate
Book:Battle Royal
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“Food for the Gods was a rich, buttery date and walnut bar, which doesn't sound all that special, but there was something absolutely addictive about it. Bernadette claimed to hate dates, yet she could eat an entire tray of these bars all by herself, they were that good. Between the five of us, we demolished Lola Flor's desserts, despite how full we were before they arrived. There truly was a separate stomach for sweets.”

BarsDessertFilipino CuisineFruitcakeAddictive
Book:Blackmail and Bibingka
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“I didn't believe in systems. Everything human was imperfect and ultimately absurd. What did I believe in then? In humor. In laughing at systems, at people, at one's self. In laughing even at one's need to laugh all the time. In seeing life as contradictory, many-sided, various, funny, tragic, and with moments of outrageous beauty. In seeing life as a fruitcake, including delicious plums and bad peanuts, but meant to be devoured hungrily all the same because you couldn't feast on the plums without also sometimes being poisoned by the peanuts.”

PeopleNeedsBelieveHumansSelfSometimesMomentsI BelieveLaughingSeeingIncludingVariousI Believe InAbsurdTragicMeant To BeImperfectDeliciousContradictoryOutrageousPeanutsPlumsFruitcake
Author:Erica Jong
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“Once upon a time there was a girl who discovered that if she played a certain tune on a jade flute, she could summon up jade gnomes, a peculiar, harmless, but rather creepy looking spirit of the underground. The fact is that many of us have talents like this, but generally never discover them due to lack of opportunity, since one can go one's entire life without playing a jade flute, or discovering that one can speak the language of ground sloths, or turning fruitcake into solid tungsten by singing Sinatra tunes to it under a quarter moon.”

IfsFactsSpiritCertainGirlOpportunitySpeakLanguageTalentMoonSingingDuesTunesPeculiarQuartersDiscoveringCreepyOnce Upon A TimeSlothFlutesGnomeJadeFruitcake
Author:Ursula Vernon
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“Am I a fruitcake? I don't know. Perception is reality, so if I sit here and say, "I'm not a fruitcake, I'm a lemon cake," it doesn't matter. What you see me as in your world is what I am; it doesn't matter what I am - do you know what I mean? To me, I know what my real problems are - and they're certainly not about cake. And that's just the way it is.”

IfsKnowsWorldWayMeanRealMatterProblemRealityPerceptionDo You KnowCakeLemonsReal ProblemsFruitcakePerception Is Reality
Author:Macy Gray
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“As her skin sizzled under the delicious heat, she supposed she should’ve been giving serious thought to the lunacy of what she was doing playing with a vampire, who was, for all his charm, as lethal as a stiletto across the throat. But then again, most of her friends already thought she was half a nut short of a fruitcake. Why disappoint?”

GivingShouldHalfSeriousSkinsVampireHeatCharmThroatNutsDeliciousDisappointLunacyStilettosFruitcake
Book:Angels' Flight: A Guild Hunter Collection
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