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Humorous Quotes

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Humorous Quotes

“It was pleasant to me to get a letter from you the other day. Perhaps I should have found it pleasanter if I had been able to decipher it. I don't think that I mastered anything beyond the date (which I knew) and the signature (which I guessed at). There's a singular and a perpetual charm in a letter of yours; it never grows old, it never loses its novelty. Other letters are read and thrown away and forgotten, but yours are kept forever - unread. One of them will last a reasonable man a lifetime.”

“There's a lot of different ways that a song would be a challenge to parody. There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can't think of a clever enough idea. Some songs are too repetitive for me to be able to fashion a humorous set of lyrics around. Some songs flat-out just don't work creatively for me.”

Thinking Way I Can Ideas Different Enough Would Be Able Song Challenges Fashion Humorous Clever Different Ways Candidates Flats Parody Repetitive

Author:Al Yankovic

“When I was born, I was almost fourteen years old. That's why I was able to understand more easily than most what it was all about.”

Years Able Born Humorous Fourteen

Author:Eugene Ionesco

“I was able to read poets that were - allowed me to be humorous without being silly.”

Able Poet Humorous Silly Being Silly

Author:Billy Collins

“Entrepreneurs are simply those who understand that there is little difference between obstacle and opportunity and are able to turn both to their advantage.”

Littles Able Turns Opportunity Differences Decision Humorous Advantage Entrepreneur Obstacles Business Opportunity Life Opportunity

Author:Niccolo Machiavelli

“I have more ideas than I'll ever be able to write in five lifetimes.”

Life Writing Book Ideas Able Funny Five Humorous Lifetime

Author:Rick Riordan

“Government is like junior high. Your status depends upon whom you're able to persecute.”

Government Able Depends Humorous Sarcastic Juniors Junior High

Book:The Web: An Alex Delaware Novel

Source: The Web: An Alex Delaware Novel

“When I finally embraced abstinence it was because of the simple urge to work a longer day. Thus, without joining Alcoholics Anonymous, I was at last able to leave Piss-Artists Notorious.”

Humor Able Funny Lasts Artist Simple Drink Humorous Wine Drinking Alcohol Urges Alcoholics Joining Liquor Abstinence Notorious Alcoholics Anonymous Longer Days

Book:Always Unreliable: Memoirs

Source: Always Unreliable: Memoirs

“I would like to be able to admire a man's opinions as I would his dog - without being expected to take it home with me.”

Men Home Able Opinion Dog Humorous Witty Expected Admire Insightful

Author:Frank A. Clark

“An actor who knows his business ought to be able to make the London telephone directory sound enthralling.”

Knows Able Funny Actors Sound Acting Ought Humorous London Telephones

Author:Donald Sinden

“The humorous man recognizes that absolute purity, absolute justice, absolute logic and perfection are beyond human achievement and that men have been able to live happily for thousands of years in a state of genial frailty.”

Men Years Humans Has Beens States Able Justice Atheism Achievement Humorous Perfection Logic Absolutes Positive Atheism Purity Frailty

Book:Once Around the Sun

Source: Once Around the Sun

“He was a long, stripy policeman, who flowed out of his uniform at odd spots, as if Nature, setting out to make a constable, had had a good deal of material left over which she had not liked to throw away but hardly seemed able to fit into the general scheme.”

Ifs Long Able Left Deals Materials Fit Humorous Setting Settings Spots Odd Schemes Uniforms Policemen

Author:P. G. Wodehouse

“Everyone I talked to was a recording-the bank, the elevator, your office, the school, a wrong number. You used to be able to call a wrong number and get a person.”

Persons Able School Used Numbers Office Humorous Phones Used To Be Telephones Elevators Answering Machines Wrong Number

Book:Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession

Source: Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession

“The Russians will never be able to get their missiles thought the dense protective layer of delayed flights circling over the United States in complex, puke-inducing holding patterns.”

States Humor Able Funny United United States Food Humorous Complexes Patterns Flight Layers Protective Airline Missiles Dense Delayed Air Travel Puke

Author:Dave Barry