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Famous Bo Burnham Quotes
“Comedy is very strange to me and I don't fully understand it's purpose or function.”
“I don't need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.”
“And an anteater plus a large hungry mutant ant? An ironic way to die.”
“Twitter is a lot like crystal meth, because it's really fun to do and Oprah's on it.”
“Women are like fingers and toes because they're easy to count on.”
“Back home they call me the tie-dye shirt kid. Well, that and faggot.”
“I stopped and I thought, 'What would Jesus do?' So I didn't exist.”
“All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.”
“Squaring numbers are just like women. If they're under thirteen, just do them in your head.”
“If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn't respect that.”
“Do unto others as you would have them do to you, said the rapist.”
“Is there anything better than pussy? Yeah, a really good book.”
“I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.”
“Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.”
“Even if he is your friend, never, ever call an Asian person.”
“Bitches and hoes don't exist because the hoes know Bo's a feminist.”
“What's a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy”