Filter quotes by topic
Famous Lenny Bruce Quotes
“If I just stuck to pot I might have found out what a drag being an aging hipster actually was.”
“You can't just run out and start the car until some cat invents a car.”
“I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal.”
“If you're going to stop masturbating, you can't taper off. You've got to quit, cold jerky!”
“Sex and obscenity are not synonymous.”
“There is only what is and that's it. What should be is a dirty lie.”
“I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.”
“Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.”
“The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.”
“The only truly anonymous donor is the guy who knocks up your daughter.”
“When you're eight years old, nothing is any of your business.”
“I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon in the park there's nothing else to do.”
“The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.”
“If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.”
“If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish”
“If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer.”
“The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it.”