Best Bars Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 12

“According to Life & Style, Lance Armstrong was seen canoodling with fitness model Kim Strother, and the night before, he was with Ashley Olsen. He's going from bar to bar picking up women - how does he get them home? Does he put them on the handlebars, or does he have a banana seat?”

Doe Home Night Style Models Bars Seats Bananas Kim Armstrong Ashley

Author:Chelsea Handler

“For a degenerate like me, Vegas is like a walk down memory lane. Last time I went to Vegas, I went to my old coke dealer's kid's bar mitzvah.”

Kids Lasts Memories Walks Bars Like Me Last Time Vegas Lanes Dealer Coke Degenerates Bar Mitzvah Mitzvah Memory Lane

Author:Artie Lange

“It was easy to get a job at the Cedar Bar because people came and went, but I didn't like the atmosphere. Instead, I got a job at Cooper Union Library. I stayed at Cooper Union for seven years; it was my salvation. While I worked there, I also read books of every kind.”

People Years Kind Book Jobs Easy Salvation Unions Seven Library Bars Atmosphere Seven Years Easy To Get Cedars

Author:Claes Oldenburg

“Through working with amazing people, the bar is always raised to do your own best work. I want to be a part of unique stories that are smart, heartfelt, funny and sad, and have a general sense of good quality.”

People Want Stories Quality Unique Smart Raised Bars Best Work Heartfelt Good Quality Amazing People

Author:Ari Graynor

“The Republican presidential candidate [Donald Trump] provoked condemnation from leaders in both parties and around the world. He did that by proposing to bar all Muslims from entering the United States.”

World States United Party Leader United States Trump Republican Bars Around The World Presidential Candidates Entering Condemnation Presidential Candidate Provoked

Author:Steve Inskeep

“We've been working on the visual effects for a year, so we're trying to raise the bar. Stuff will absolutely come out at the screen, but it will absolutely not look as bad as that tire in Final Destination.”

Trying Years Looks Stuff Effects Raises Finals Screens Bars Visuals Destination Tire Raising The Bar Final Destination Visual Effects

Author:Paul W. S. Anderson

“New York Stat agreed to pay $12 million to settle a lawsuit filed three decades ago by inmates swept up in the bloody 1971 revolt at Attica prison. The settlement will be paid in the form of chocolate bars and packs of Newports that can be picked up in the commissary.”

Form Three Pay Millions New York Paid Prison Decades Bars Settling Chocolate Bloody Packs Revolt Settlement Lawsuit Inmates Chocolate Bars

Author:Colin Quinn

“I wanted to be self-sufficient, I wanted to take care of myself, and I wanted to learn. I wanted to travel, I wanted to see the world and have my eyes opened. I wanted to be consistently challenged, and I knew I needed to be creative in some way. When I got my job in a bar and I could pay for my tuition and go on auditions and sometimes get jobs that I loved and pay my rent, I knew that I would be all right. That's when my dreams came true, long before the telephone rang and someone said, 'Come and meet Tom Cruise'".”

“Farrell's Bar in Brooklyn had urinals so large they looked like shower stalls for Toulouse-Lautrec.”

Bars Showers Brooklyn Toulouse

Author:Joe Flaherty

“My dad's all I've ever had. When I was 3 and 4, my mom used to take me to bars. I understand why now - babysitters cost beer, beer and-a-half an hour.”

Used Hours Half Mom Dad Cost My Dad My Mom Bars Beer Take Me Babysitter Why Now

Author:Christopher Titus

“My parents' divorce settlement involved a bar tab.”

Parent Involved Divorce Bars Settlement Parents Divorce

Author:Christopher Titus

“My girlfriend loves to eat chocolate. She's always eating chocolate. And she likes to joke she's got a chocolate addiction. You know, she'd be like keep me away from those chocolate bars, I'm addicted to them. And it's really annoying. So one day I put her in the car and I drove her downtown and I pointed out a crack addict. And I said you see that honey? Why can't you be that skinny?”

Said Car Eating Jokes Addiction Bars Likes Girlfriend Chocolate Cracks Honey Annoying Addict Skinny My Girlfriend Downtown Eating Chocolate Hershey Always Eating

Author:Anthony Jeselnik

“And I don't want you thinking that my girlfriend is a bad person. She is an amazing woman, the fact that I only have seven stories about her in eight years, says a lot. You know, don't get me wrong, five of them happened this year, but that's still way below the bar, you know what I am saying.”

Thinking Knows Way Want Years Persons Stills Facts Stories Five Happened Seven Eight Bars Girlfriend My Girlfriend Amazing Woman

Author:Gabriel Iglesias

“When you have nothing but big friends, you never get into arguments - except one. And that is, who is the biggest? I'll let you know right now, there's only one way to settle this. We all get in a bus and we go to Disney and we get on a roller coaster - whoever gets the least amount of clicks on the safety bar is the big one.”

Knows Way Bigs Amount Right Now Argument Safety Bars One Way Settling Bus Clicks Roller Coaster Coasters Fluffy

Author:Gabriel Iglesias

“Television for a child creates such a high bar of stimulus that nothing else competes. A beautiful day is absolute crap to a kid who watches tv.”

Children Kids Beautiful Watches Television Tvs Absolutes Bars Crap Stimulus Beautiful Day

Author:Louis C. K.

“Although I love the taste of Nutrageous bars, I am nutraged at their new, high price.”

Taste Bars High Prices

Author:Dana Gould

“Whoever thought to name a candy bar Butterfinger has either never seen Last Tango In Paris or seen it far too many times.”

Lasts Names Bars Paris Candy Tango Candy Bar

Author:Dana Gould

“When you ask a girl out and she suggest a bar, you're answer shouldn't be great, I like that bar and they'll have the Rockets game on too.”

Girl Asks Games Answers Bars Rockets Ask A Girl

Author:Iliza Shlesinger

“Oh my god, Jenny McCarthy is the coolest chick. She's the kind of girl you can play volleyball with and she's diggin' it out in the dirt. She's the girl that's playing softball - not worrying about breaking a nail. She's out there breaking nails and diving at second. And then, she's going to out-drink you at the bar.”

Kind Play Girl Worry Drink Bars Nails Dirt Chicks Softball Volleyball Diving Kind Of Girl Not Worrying Jenny

Author:Bill Bellamy

“I don't remember much about my bar mitzvah. The only thing I remember - I killed! That's what I remembered. Nobody could follow me at my bar-mitzvah. It was over when I was done.”

Done Remember Bars Remembered Follow Me Bar Mitzvah Mitzvah

Author:Andy Kindler

“My cousin Louie, we walk into a bar, and he says, Dom, I think that waitress knows me. What do you think she knows, Louie? The fact that your belly came in four steps ahead of you?”

Thinking Knows Facts Walks Steps Four Bars Know Me Belly Cousin Waitress My Cousin Doms

Author:Dom Irrera

“You're in a bar - grow up. You're drinking poison. You're trying to have sex unsafely with someone you don't know. Is secondhand smoke really the chiefest of your health concerns at this point?”

Knows Trying Sex Grows Growing Up Concern Drinking Bars Smoke Poison Smoking Drinking Poison Secondhand Smoke

Author:Greg Proops

“I've done everything. Selling door-to-door fire extinguishers... In bars, I used to repair those machines that have 10 different buttons on them to spray club soda and seltzer.”

Different Done Used Fire Doors Machines Clubs Bars Selling Buttons Spray Soda Fire Extinguishers

Author:J. B. Smoove

“Strangers come up to me in bars and tell me about their sex lives. I'm thinking, 'You think I can make it better somehow?'”

Thinking I Can Sex Come Up Stranger Bars

Author:Chris Harrison

“Playboys' was an authentic junkie record. Art Pepper was just out of jail, Chet was arrested a week after the session, and piano player Carl Perkins would die two years later. When the record was recorded I was behind bars myself. In 1955 I was caught with narcotics and had to serve almost five years. Luckily, I was allowed to keep my saxophone in the cell, and I composed a lot during the time. They had to come fetch the music for Playboys from jail.”

Years Art Two Dies Behinds Records Five Player Week Caught Bars Cells Piano Five Years Two Years Jail Session Arrested Junkie Playboy Peppers Saxophone Narcotics Fetch

Author:Jimmy Heath

“I have a very personal view of what I want in a café. I don't spend a lot of time thinking about what other people want. I have my enthusiasms, and it's exciting to work through them in this medium of coffee bars.”

People Thinking Want Views Exciting Coffee Bars Mediums Enthusiasm Personal Views

Author:James Freeman

“What we need now is the greatest generation of young adults in the history of the Church. We need your whole heart and soul. In other words, it's time to raise the bar not only for missionaries but also for returned missionaries and for your entire generation.”

Needs Heart Soul Whole Young Church Generations Adults Raises Young Adult Bars Heart And Soul Raising The Bar Greatest Generation

Author:M. Russell Ballard

“If something comes along that you don't like, there are a few sort of four-letter words that you can use to push it out of the sphere of discussion. If you were in a bar downtown, they might have different words, but if you're an educated person what you use are complicated words like "conspiracy theory" or "Marxist." It's a way of pushing unpleasant questions off the agenda so that we can continue in our own happy ideology.”

“I grew up in a house where there was lots of teasing and language play and laughter; it was very important. When I was a teenager, you wouldn't go to a bar and find lots of televisions everywhere. People were talking. Talk was the mental fire you would gather around in the evening. It occupied a big part of your existence.”

People Important Play Bigs House Language Existence Talking Fire Television Grew Grew Up Laughter Bars Evening Teenager Tease

Author:Dylan Moran

“Between 1995 and 2005, the prison population grew by 30 percent, meaning an additional half million criminals were behind bars, rather than lurking in dark alleys with switchblades. You can well imagine liberals' surprise when the crime rate went down as more criminals were put in prison. The New York Times was reduced to running querulous articles with headlines like Number in Prison Grows Despite Crime Reduction and As Crime Rate Drops, the Prison Rate Rises and the Debate Rages.”

Source: Godless: The Church of Liberalism

“Paul McCartney is a genius ... Paul married Rock & Roll to beauty, and forever raised the bar for composers, musicians, and fans ... an incredible solo performer ... the creator of our favorite songs.”

Song Forever Fans Rocks Genius Married Musician Raised Incredibles Creator Bars Performers Composer Solo Favorite Song

Author:Alec Baldwin

“I learned a lot about lead; you don't have to blow your cookies in the first bar. It is much harder to be simple that to be complicated during solos.”

Firsts Simple Harder Blow Complicated Bars Solo Cookies

Author:Tommy Bolin

“The idea that guys should walk into a bar and confidently initiate contact and then seduce a woman based on a short term conversation is a toxic cultural myth that robs guys of self-confidence and that holds them up to an unrealistic standard that they have to become a super-extraverted narcissist in order to 'score with women'”

Should Ideas Self Guy Order Term Walks Conversation Standards Myth Self Confidence Bars Contact Score Toxic Short Term That Guy Seducing Narcissist Initiate

Author:Tucker Max

“It's progress I think, that science has joined philosophy, metaphysics & religion as subjects drunk people argue about in bars.”

People Thinking Philosophy Progress Subjects Arguing Bars Drunk Metaphysics Drunk People

Author:Neil deGrasse Tyson

“When I first started, I worked with three chords in every bar, but I found that tied me down - I'm not a chord-change writer, I'm a songwriter.”

Firsts Three Found Bars Tied Songwriters Chords

Author:Neil Diamond

“I bad a piano long before I bad a guitar, and the practice I got just playing those three chords in a basic 12-bar blues song was very important.”

Long Important Song Three Practice Guitar Bars Piano Chords

Author:Mark Knopfler

“I remember back in Detroit, I used to go to the Apex Bar every night after I got off work. The bartender there used to call me Boom Boom. I don't know why, but he did.”

Knows Remember Used Night Bars Call Me Every Night Detroit Bartender Apex

Author:John Lee Hooker

“I used to play pianos in bars. You know in hotels, you'd see guys playing piano with a snifter? That was me, with a painted-on mustache. I was about 15.”

Knows Play Used Guy Bars Piano Hotel Mustache Playing Piano

Author:Brian McKnight

“When I was 13, I was playing in the bars. I guess it's a changing world. Some things are better today, like the internet. We have different ways of reaching each other. E-mail and all that stuff is wonderful. I actually think the kids are missing out on a lot of stuff.”

Thinking World Way Different Kids Today Stuff Wonderful Missing Internet Bars Different Ways Reaching Mail Missing Out

Author:Ray Parker, Jr.

“Good Lord's been kind to me, that's all I can say. I wake up in the morning with music in my head a lot of times. I won't say every morning, but I wake up in the morning sometimes with eight bars in my head and I just go to the piano.”

Kind I Can Sometimes Lord Morning Wake Up Eight Bars Piano Every Morning

Author:Horace Silver

“Just go to a bar, watch football - that's fun to me because I've not gotten to see anything because I've been travelling so much. Playing some shuffleboard and some pool and darts. I like kind of dive-y bars.”

Kind Fun Watches Football Bars Pool Darts

Author:Miles Teller

“I would rather people not smoke. I certainly appreciate the fact that smoking is not legal in restaurants and bars. That used to stop me from going out at night because you'd go someplace and your clothes would reek and you wouldn't enjoy the experience and that affects your rights. It's always a question.”

People Facts Used Night Enjoy Rights Clothes Appreciate Bars Smoke Restaurants Smoking Going Out

Author:Ian Bremmer

“I grew up bar-singing and saw all kinds of ways people tried to outrun their emotional pain. It doesn't work. You end up with the original pain, as well as new pain added on top of it from the tactics you used trying to avoid it in the first place. It's best to take a deep breath, bolster yourself, and walk through it.”

People Way Trying Firsts Wells Kind Ends Pain Used Walks Saws Emotional Grew Grew Up Singing Breaths Originals Bars All Kinds Tactics Emotional Pain Deep Breath Take A Deep Breath Outrun

Author:Jewel

“When I'm writing in my bedroom, in a bar, at my kitchen table or wherever, I'm conjuring it all up on the page. That's all well and good, but it is going to be a limited perspective at that point and time. Occasionally, what I write might read really well initially, but then you change your mind while hunting for locations when you discover settings which offer even better opportunities for drama or dramatic staging.”

“You have bits of canvas that are unpainted and you have these thick stretcher bars. So you see that a painting is an object; that it's not a window into something - you're not looking at a landscape, you're not looking at a portrait, but you're looking at a painting. It's basically: A painting is a painting is a painting. And it's what Frank Stella said famously: What you see is what you see.”

Said Bits Objects Painting Window Bars Landscape Thick Frank Canvas Portraits Stella

Author:Frank Stella

“Before too long I was playing badly out in some bars around Memphis, but as soon as I learned a few chords I started writing my own stuff.”

Writing Long Stuff My Own Bars Chords Memphis

Author:Bryan Hayes

“A lot of my buddies enjoy the writing part or the studio part, and I love the live show part. That's the reason I got into all this, to play keg parties and bars. I still love playing live.”

Writing Stills Reason Play Shows Enjoy Party Studios Bars Buddy Kegs

Author:Kevin Fowler

“The first time I go out to Nashville, ever (at this point I had only heard the rumors about what it's like) I had three writing sessions set up. The first two canceled on me. I was kind of pissed off at that point. So I just went back to my hotel room and started writing. And even though I've been to L.A. and experienced a lot of things, at the end of the day I just start to feel like I'm playing acoustically at the first bar I ever played at.”

Feels Writing Firsts Kind Two Ends Three Rooms Heard First Time Bars The End Of The Day Hotel Session Rumor Nashville Hotel Rooms Pissed Off

Author:Curtis Grimes

“Music was fundamental in my family. Sang at bars, all the way to church on Sunday. Music in school, played guitar pulls at the house, go to other people's houses and break out the guitars, it was fun. It was always there, I've just been a part of it.”

People Way School House Fun Church Break My Family Fundamentals Guitar Bars Sunday Break Out Church On Sunday Music In Schools

Author:Jamey Johnson

“I play in bars all the time in the States, so I'm kind of used to it. I've just got off the road with the family in Australia, and I enjoyed it but it feels really good to be getting back to doing this stuff.”

Feels Kind States Play Used Stuff Bars Enjoyed Australia

Author:Martha Wainwright

Bars Quotes

Related topics

Bars Quotes