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Humorous Quotes

Browse 3047 quotes about Humorous.

Humorous Quotes

“A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns.”

Men Funny Feet Humorous Hundred Gun Libertarian Lawyer Stealing Attorney Briefcases Corleone Best Lawyer

Author:Mario Puzo

“I have a love interest in every one of my films: a gun.”

Funny Film Interest Humorous Gun Witty Gun Control Funny Relationship

Author:Arnold Schwarzenegger

“There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.”

Hands Seems Funny America Humorous Gun Circles Smoking Acceptable Cigarette Cigar Smoking Cigarettes Smoking Cigars Smoking A Pipe Tobacco Smoking Funny Smoking Pipe Smoking

Author:Katharine Whitehorn

“The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.”

Source: A Wodehouse Bestiary

“Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”

Humorous Gun Witty Pockets Sarcastic Female Characters Unspeakable Great Aviation Just Be Happy Innuendo Double Entendre Risque Happy To See You

Author:Mae West

“We have federal regulations and state laws that prohibit hunting ducks with more than three rounds. And yet it's legal to hunt humans with 15-round, 30-round, even 150-round magazines.”

Humans States Funny America Law Three Violence Society Politician Humorous Gun Killing Rounds Absurd Magazines Usa Hunting Ducks Regulation Senators Gun Control Hunts Duck Hunting

Author:Dianne Feinstein

“Guns don't kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).”

People Ifs Funny Humorous Gun Killing Comedian Monkeys Killing Each Other

Author:Eddie Izzard

“Funny, isn't it? The airlines go to all that trouble to keep you from taking a gun on board, then they just hand you a dinner roll you could kill a musk ox with.”

Humor Hands Funny Trouble Food Humorous Gun Dinner Boards Airline Air Travel Musk

Book:The World According to Dave Barry

Source: The World According to Dave Barry