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Humorous Quotes

Browse 3047 quotes about Humorous.

Humorous Quotes

“Saturday night in Toledo Ohio, Is like being nowhere at all, All through the day how the hours rush by, You sit in the park and you watch the grass die.”

Night Dies Hours Watches Humorous Grass Parks Saturday Ohio Saturday Night Toledo

Author:John Denver

“Go to humorous events at comedy clubs and watch laughable movies.”

Watches Comedy Events Humorous Clubs Laughable Comedy Clubs

Author:Jeffrey Gitomer

“Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.”

People Inspiration Attitude Watches Military Humorous Profound Insane Cynical Bad Ass

Author:George S. Patton

“I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.”

“Why do they bother with a suicide watch when someone is on death row? "Keep an eye on this guy. We're gonna kill him, and we don't want him to hurt himself."”

Want Eye Guy Hurt Watches Humorous Suicide Bother This Guy Want Him Death Row

Book:Napalm & Silly Putty

Source: Napalm & Silly Putty

“There's nothing on it worthwhile, and we're not going to watch it in this household, and I don't want it in your intellectual diet.”

Want Funny Watches Television Intellectual Humorous Diets Worthwhile Household Inventor Pioneers

Author:Philo Farnsworth

“Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults as rotten SOB's given to fistfights, gunplay, and other mayhem. Kids who believe this about grownups aren't likely to argue about bedtime.”

Source: The Bachelor Home Companion: A Practical Guide to Keeping House Like a Pig