Filter quotes by topic
Famous Jeff Foxworthy Quotes
“You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.”
“You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet.”
“You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born.”
“You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.”
“You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.”
“You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap.”
“You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.”
“You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.”
“You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.”
“You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.”
“You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.”
“You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.”
“You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.”
“You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.”
“You might be a redneck if your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.”
“You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.”
“You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.”
“You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.”
“You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.”
“You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.”
“You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.”
“You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.”
“You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.”
“You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.”
“You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress.”
“You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.”
“You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.”
“You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.”
“You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.”
“You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.”
“You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.”
“You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.”
“You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.”
“You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.”