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“I sat still for awhile, and I saw something when the mist cleared that I had never fully seen before. If you see my truth as a sign of disrespect (because it conflicts with your truth), then nothing I can ever say can ever have an effect that isn't negative... So I didn't contradict anything. Anything. I just took it all in. And then, yes, I get to go back to my world and do with it what I will. I wouldn't do it for just anyone. But for them, it was worth it. It was so worth it.”

“Not just the Congress is capitulating to 45/47 and the dismantling of our government: industry, lawyers, even esteemed, independent colleges. It's a horrifying difficult-to-fully-process time. Some of us still have our lives intact-- barely affected by the clenching at our throats and the rising terror-- but there are others losing their life's work-- there are others being kidnapped on the streets-- people who can't stay, people who can't come back, people who are just thrown in prisons of one kind or another here or elsewhere. Whose life matters anyway?”

“...many women have almost always done it differently, power without control, leading without terrorizing, nurturing community and communal input and output like nurturing a family. Maybe that's one of the main reasons powerful men resist women in power; it's not just control they don't want to give up, not just privilege, but exploitation.”

“Every fire burns itself out, but only when all the fuel has been exhausted. Here we are, surrounded by fire. Who throws fodder on the flames? Who is lost in the blaze to the blaze? And what damage will it do before it burns itself away completely? Here we are, surrounded by fire, fire starters, fire growers, and fire revelers. Where are the firefighters? We are the firefighters.”

“I am memorializing the just-barely-adults (mostly boys, mostly less privileged) who have died fighting wars that for the most part were not their own... the families who have had to go on without them... those who gave their life to this country by standing for our freedoms in non-wars--struggles-- struggles about race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, contraception and abortion rights, the environment, eradication of global disease and world hunger, the right to collectively bargain and unionize... who paid the ultimate price through their civil disobedience, protest, collective action, or just by living in a way that was so challenging to others that they were executed for it... the ones from whom we stole this land and those whose lives we stole to build it... those who were just trying to go to school, pray, shop, watch a movie, be, when they were gunned down in a country that loves its guns far more than its people... those who were killed for driving while black, walking while black, talking while black, sleeping while black. On Decoration Day we are decorated with their blood and their memory”

“How do you make hope? For me, it's writing, reading, researching, rehearsing, teaching, coaching, loving--partnering, parenting, friending, all those things that take me outside of myself and take me deeper inside myself at the same time, a beautiful contradictory co-existing reality. We do not know yet what is still to come, but we do know what we can do to find our way through it. Keep making things, keep making hope. It's the least we can do. It's the most we can do.”

“See," she said, "I can hold on to you while everything else changes." And she thought she was safe and so, in that safety, could face whatever was to come. And then all of a sudden that you is gone-- that person, that family, that home, that job (maybe even that occupation), maybe even that country, that world-- and there's nothing to hold onto at all, and that self, that life, is gone as well, and yet more self--truer self--than ever before. And how can that all be so true at the same time? And yet it is.”

“He used to be like a Snake Oil Salesman in the wild west hawking his wares in the town square as if at the carny. Branded tower condos. Steaks. Deodorant. Water. Vodka. Ostensible educations--those were pure scam. Sneakers. Playing cards. NFTs. Bibles. Swatches of his found-guilty suit. A Used Car salesman selling cars designed to run just long enough off the lot to get him the bucks and the battle win and plow down everyone around him. But now he's desperate, losing even his ability to coerce and con, which is the only ability he ever had.”

“He's already been president. We know his policies, his jurist picks, and all his methodologies. We know who he cozies up to and who he leaves out in the cold and diseased air... He's become a Used Trump Salesman. And all his marketers, campaign officials, and media strategists are Used Trump Salesmen with a desperate, deteriorating Used Trump they're equally as desperate to sell.”

“Setting boundaries is easy... Holding boundaries is what's hard. But then, over time, something miraculous happens. You set the boundary, you do what you need to do, and you immediately feel lighter, freer, less burdened-- not every time, not with every person-- but with some people every time-- and with every person sometimes-- and a new habit forms of doing it in a way that works better for you and not making yourself suffer for that. I love feeling that I've made a good decision for myself, for the situation, for the long-range outcome.”

“I'm thinking about how as a human being Trump is immune from all the normal inhibiting factors that cause people to be good, and caring, and careful (whether because they believe in humanity or they fear God's wrath). No self-awareness. No empathy. No humility. No shame. I'm thinking about how as a society we can never wholly become immune from diseased minds like his because if we ever did find a 'perfect' structure, we would calcify the findings of that moment and create a new kind of 'originalism' that could become equally as dangerous as any other (the origin story of the United States, the constitution, the Bible). That belief that it was perfect would itself defeat us.”

“Hypocrisy may be the acknowledgement of how one is falling short of one's objectives and ideal behavior but at other times hypocrisy may be the acknowledgement that one is not meeting the external standards of the systems and the society where they are trying to belong, to "fit in" and so may choose to hide aspects of their truest self. Different kind of hypocrisy. Can you recognize the difference? Can you feel the difference?”

“The native population of this continent deserves more notice taken than on Indigenous Peoples Day. But this day at least, please, let's learn more about the people whose land we stole (yes, even we whose forebearers came more recently, because we continue to benefit from the theft), and to sit in the complexity that is the building and continuation of our civilization.”

“Sympathy is not action, and does not absolve us of the need to do something. Action is effective with this travesty, pushing back creates friction and exposure if incapable of stopping the destruction altogether. He's weak tea. Not just Putin can bully him. Even Musk can bully him, even Musk's young son. We have to keep remembering that. And the political minions following him can even more easily be bullied-- that's how he got them on board in the first place. They don't want to lose their place and their power. Do something. Make a call. Write a letter. Attend a protest or a town hall. It may not stop everything, but it may stop something. And at least we'll have tried.”

“Might the safest space be this: Safe from having to wear your armor. Safe from having to laugh off your pain. Safe to laugh at your pain, at yourself. Safe to know your truth... Safe to feel... Safe to disagree... Not safe from struggling with the conundrums of life, Safe to struggle with them To sit in the dis-comfort of no-extremes... Safe to spin through all the chaos... And feel the shoulder of another traveler... And know you are not alone. You are not alone.”

“I'm sorry'--like 'I love you'--like many phrases--means more than one thing, even on its surface. So people get confused what they're saying and what they're hearing when the words 'I'm sorry' are spoken... But even when you're clear which kind of 'sorry' is in play, the words of an apology only mean what they are invested with. 'I'm sorry' is the vessel. What's inside the 'sorry' container makes all the difference.”

“For white Americans (whiteness itself a societal construct that has changed in it definition over time), this new national holiday of Juneteenth, this day off from work, should be like an American Yom Kippur, a Day of Atonement, a day of reflection, a day to keep learning more about how we have failed as a society to live up to our ideals, and what we as individuals can do to make it better, more real, closer to our vision of justice and liberty, a vision that our founding forefathers could not even imagine. 'Do better' should be what all who carry any kind of privilege in this society should say to ourselves and to each other - what can we do, what can you do, to 'do better'?”

“It's called Gelotology. (Because it gives you Gelo Belly?) Beyond a giggle, a titter, a chuckle, and way past groaning (although groaning has its profound effects as well), it shakes your very corpuscles, a good belly laugh. It releases endorphins, stimulates the body's painkillers, increases neuropeptides which boosts the immune system, expands blood vessels. What????? It relaxes tension and makes you feel happier no matter what the current conditions.”

“It's a balancing act, keeping hope but not letting it drive you to distraction. Because the flip side of hope, the dark side, is the side that keeps you wanting to be somewhere else from where you are, with something else from what you've got-- the side that keeps you from appreciating and feeling fully and deeply what there is in this moment. Hope keeps us in the flow--moving forward-- and I will not underestimate its value, but hopelessness keeps us present in the moment, whether it is the Buddhist hopelessness of non-attachment or the hopelessness of despair.”

“I think there is a place where hopefulness and hopelessness co-exist, one of my beloved contradictory co-existing realities (what others call a paradox, but paradoxes can be mis-defined themselves, not owning their true contrari-ness and/or co-existence): something like joy-and-hope-in-the-process-of-being-and-becoming, something like awareness-of-distant-goals-without-attachment-to-getting-them, something like satisfaction-in-dissatisfaction. Like riding a roller coaster, being and feeling where it is and feeling where it's going all at the same time, since where it's going is part of where it is, and, whatever the now is, it will never stay there. Something like life.”